AIM Classics
These'll be updated every now and then. I'll take the quotes that I'm deleting from my profile (to make room for more) and put them on here.
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Entries Entered Last Are at the Top.
(So I could have something in my profile for
a long time, so it's actually pretty old.)
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06/11/08
Tom (Away Message): whose feeling what?
Joe: I'm feeling you
Joe: clearly
Tom: how did I know exactly what you'd say?
Joe: because it'd be weirder if I said "you're feeling me"
Joe: at least I'm on top?
Tom: ...
Tom: I need to study
Joe: kk, bjoli
Tom: stop throwing your body at me
Joe: nevarrr
Joe: one of these days
Tom: haha
Tom: ...
Joe: <3
Joe: is it who's or whose?
Tom: what?
Joe: which is proper english?
Tom: ... I think they both are
Joe: who's (contraction for who is) vs. whose (who+posessive)
Tom: yeah
Tom: I know whose that is
Joe: so you mean "who's feeling what"?
Tom: yeah
Joe: not that I notice
Tom: as in: who is
Joe: exactly
Tom: contracted
Joe: much like its and it's
Joe: it's = it is
Tom: yeah
Joe: contraction
Tom: basically
Joe: so um.
Tom: ok
Joe: correct it
Tom: stop talking
Joe: then go back to hw
Joe: <3
Tom: there
Joe: bjoli
Tom (Away Message): who's feeling what?
Joe: that is quite chill, ol' chap
Travis: lol it is definitely colder than the average
Tom: you're a nerd
Tom: a big cuddly one
Joe: takes one to know one
Alex: Hey. I was at Circuit City this morning. Took me half an hour to do my price match.
Amanda: It doesn't at my store!!!
Alex: Your store doesn't have what I want anyway.
11/19/06
XT: Lance Bass is GAY!
Joe: I know
Joe: *wink*
06/05/06
Auto-Response from Joe: I'm playing Final Fantasy XI
Ashley R: You're my final fantasy
(I've taught her well)
For those of you that remember when I was playing Metal Gear Solid a few months ago, this is exactly what happens.
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/297383
Just try to tell me this isn't amazing:
http://www.satugo.com/
Tom: I need a good idea for a film
Joe: Big Boobies Vol. 43
Tom: that Chris and I can make
Joe: oh
Joe: damn
Tom: yeah...about that
Tom: Taylor and Joe duke it out over who has the real C cup
Tom: i mean
Joe: the winner gets Tom
Joe: the loser gets Chris?
Tom: ...
Tom: exactly
Tom: *wink*
Tom: i mean
Tom: ...
05/24/06
bipolartendencys: CHANGE YOUR PROFILE!!!
XTreme Skater777: <3
bipolartendencys: yeah yeah
bipolartendencys: dont think yu can love your way out of this one
[08:11.59] Adrienne: what is the wierdest response youv'e gotten back from one of thoes *rub* things
Brandon: so alex and I were talking...
Brandon:
Brandon: nooo the dl speed is going down
Brandon: STOP DOWNLOADING YAOI
Brandon: oh wait thats my end
Brandon: ok now its going up
Joe: oh dear
Joe: hahaha
Brandon: the rest
Brandon:
Alex: b-chang
Alex: tell that to joe
Brandon: i will submit it
Brandon: for his approval
Alex: you batard
Brandon: submission sent
Alex: lmao
Alex: did I ever tell you
Alex: I hate you sometimes
Joe: hahahahahaha
Joe: <3
Brandon: just wanted you to know
Brandon: ;P
Joe: night mr cutie
Joe: <3
Brandon: nite honeybuns
Brandon: lemme taste you in the mor-nin
4/23/06
Adrienne: can i IM you whenever I want?
Adrienne: HECK YES i CAN
Adrienne: because im adrienne.
Adrienne: bihatches aint got shiza on me
Ashley R: joe, you're a new breed. you're joemosexual
Alex: only go halfway too
Alex: so it's like
Alex: you feel it go
Alex: but then you're like, "it's not going deep enough"
Joe: i daresay. you're the first asian man to ever say, "it only goes in halfway."
Alex: that can be SO misquoted out of context
Alex: HOLY SHIT
Joe: What's your craziest fantasy?
Adrienne: hm
Adrienne: playing super smash bro's with joseph smith... *flutters eyelashes*
Joe: i'm thinking about starting up a trip to Japan over the summer
Joe: but we'll see
Kelly: Have fun crazy foreigner
Kelly: I can teach you how to pick up girls
Joe: alex stated his interest
Joe: haha
Joe: good
Joe: with my overconfidence and your techinique
Joe: alex will have plenty of pictures
Kelly: "ore wa SUGEE okane mochi" will prolly work
Kelly: that means you're SUPER rich
Joe: hahahahaha
Kelly: it's kind of a universal turn-on
Joe: alex is a universal turn-on
Kelly: no
Kelly: no he isn't
Joe: lol
Kelly: considering his type is small underaged Asian girls though, I think he might do well
3/21/06
AND THUS ENDS THE RECOVERY WEEK. *sigh*
Wes: joe lol my mom saw my airsoft gun today
Wes: dude it was crazy
Wes: she wasn't mad or anything
Wes: i told her, "uhh its not mine ...joe let me borrow it in acse we ever have an airsoft war...don't worry, plus its ages 16+ and i'm 16"
Wes: she was like, "ok you return it to joe whenever and no questions asked."
Wes: "you think you'd have learned your lesson after 8th grade..."
Wes: talk about luck...
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
GUYS DISTANCE TEAM:
Next week is 22 miles. FOR THE WHOLE WEEK. YES. TWENTY-TWO MILES. I LOVE RECOVERY WEEKS. (we were running high 40s/low 50s for the past 6 weeks)
Adrienne: PORKY MY BUTT
Joe: well .. yes, actually. that was the point of the whole statement.
XT: the beginning of your screen name is xt
XT: i thought you'd like to know
Joe: tom is a pretty good lay, so dun worry about that
XT: hahahaha
XT: alright thanks
XT: for the info.
Ashley R: hahaha oh joe... do you pay people to say weird things in your profile? i seriously can't imagine them that weird all the time
02/22/06
Roger: also, as a volunteer, I can make love to everyone's sister on the team
Joe: ...
Roger: don't worry i use protection sometimes
Alex: it'll be good for you to get into me
obby: duuuuuude, did u know Eckert loves SoaD???
Robby: it's okay
Robby: I'm sensitive too
Robby: That's why I kill stuff.
Chris C: i hate you
Joe: I love you too.
Chris C: no
Chris C: you can die
Joe: <3
Robby: but when i'm old, i intend to be a perv
(I'm showing Adrienne bash.org)
Adrienne: my friend seriously said this yesterday
Adrienne: he was like "what the fuck is wtf?"
Joe: THOMAS
Joe: I LOVE YOU IN A STRAIGHT WAY
Tom: sorry joe, but that's not enough
Joe: ...
Tom: ;-)
Joe: in a homos....
Joe: ...
Joe: oh my
Wes: I'm trying to do something
Joe: *someone...?
Wes: *Joe
Joe: profiled
Wes: i hope nobody gets the wrong idea about that statement, but i'm pretty sure they won't cuz it is in your profile and all..
Joe: sarcasm at it's finest
Alex: *shows me a picture of a fake magic card titled, "That Ass" that only has 1 ability: "Tap."*
Alex: Joe
Joe: Yo
Alex: i play That Ass
Alex: and i'll tap it
Joe: YEEAAaaaaaAAAaaHHHHhhHhh!
Alex: and end my turn.
Biruke: I could picture jo like freaking with guys instead of girls
Joe: biruke
Joe: that was a SHAMELESS attempt
Joe: to get in the profile
Joe: but I think it succeeded
Biruke: no im serious though
Biruke: lol haha like i seriously would picture u comin up on me and freaking with me
Biruke: then i turn around and notice and ull play it off like ur just walkin and trying to get through the crowd
01/03/06
Adrienne: my friend lauren, she was on the phone last night, the girl with the knife..really wants to meet you guys..
Adrienne: like REALLY wants to
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 18:13:54 2005
[06:13.55] djIhcoro: nigga
[06:13.55] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
[06:13.59] djIhcoro: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 18:14:58 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 19:32:41 2005
[07:32.43] djIhcoro: nigga nigga
[07:32.43] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 19:45:23 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 20:44:10 2005
[08:44.14] djIhcoro: joe you eggroll
[08:44.15] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
[08:44.17] djIhcoro: return
[08:44.26] djIhcoro: because you never pick up your phone
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 20:45:02 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sun Jan 01 00:09:04 2006
[12:09.10] djIhcoro: happy new year's negrotem
[12:09.10] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
Session Close (Joe): Sun Jan 01 00:09:12 2006
Mike Yi: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Mike Yi: u big hunky sexy man
Dan: Happy New Years Gay Man who just turned 18.
Roger: ur making sweet gay love to chris huh on new years eve, u faggots
Kedar: y Put this in your profile if you or someone you know is fighting, has survived, or has died in a pokemon battle.
12/26/05
robby duncan just gave me 18 bags of swedish fish. oh damn.
Ashley: i can't believe its almost your birthday!!! are you having strippers?
Ashley: male onessss
Mike Yi: How come all your profile entires all are about you being gay? How about a few
Mike: JOE SMITH IS AWESOME!!!!
Joe: gosh
Joe: you and your irresistible shameless plugs
Mike: well I take i back. some are about ..... ........ robby not killing things, so i guess i was wrong.
Mike: but the majority are about......................guys.........................or being naked
Mike: take me out
Mike: is a great song
M: my name is mike jones
M: nigga what
M: i like to move it
J: WTF
J: negro
J: what
M: wtf am i saying? hahaha
M: u know
M: when u say irresistible shameless plugs
M: that sounds like a butt plug to me
J: *rub*
Robby: stickers suck balls
Joe: *sigh* if only
Robby: ...........
Robby: Joe would love playboy stickers then
Mike: you know how to make a boy blush
Joe: ...temple?
Joe: like ...
Joe: nudist temple?
Roger: like jews
Robby: man
Robby: i haven't killed something
Robby: in a good
Robby: like
Robby: 48 hours or so
Robby: that's unhealthy
Roger: hi2u
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (1:16:35 PM): <3
Roger: i like autoresponse joe, he's less homo
12/14/05
Roger: you don't speak english anymore, do you?
Roger: it's all just rubbish
Robby: at the top of Accelerator and Boomerang, I let out a cry in your name:
Joe: whaaa?!
Robby: "LLEEERROOOOOYYYYYYY JENKINNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS!!!!!!"
"There's no time to stop for gas, we're already late"
-- Karin Donker
Roger: i hate papers
Roger: i suck at grammar
Roger: and life
Joe: and pen15
Roger: its not eww to rub another guy but its eww to rub yourself
Joe: *rub*
The Shark: ..........................
The Shark: gues what time is it!!???!!?!?!?!
Joe: LICK THE SHARK TIME!
The Shark: hahaha
The Shark: whatever u want joe
Tom: joe if you verbalized the things you say online ...... you would get shot
The Shark: rub time
Roger: *soft but gentle rub*
12/06/05
Roger: *turns into woman*
Roger: hah now u don't want to rub
Joe: *rub*
Roger: damn...u go both ways
Mike Yi: joseph smith, whos that? just the manliest man on earth
Mike: not.......
Joe: so I can put Iron Maiden as one of my interests, right?
Mike Yi: sure sure
Mike Yi: don't say guys though
Mike Yi: it might hurt your chances
Biruke: i've given up on you
Biruke: rub all you want
Birkue: its useless to fight it
Long: what's a liberal art?
Joe: *rub*
Tom: *activate anti-rub suit*
Joe: damn ...
Tom: yeah, I've been thinking of that one for so long
(I swear, this is true)
Essay Typo: Rather than continuing on with a sport I hated, I discovered my true competitive love is rubbin--- ... running.
Tom at the CC Banquet: Our next senior hates work more than almost anyone I know. And yet ... he's the one that scheduled our frickin' 6 AM morning weight lifting practices ... Yes, we also wonder if Joe is insane.
Kedar: do you like wrestling?
Joe: no
Kedar: then quit.
Kedar: tada!
Tom: ur not going to college are you
Kedar: raunchily wonderful
Tom: I know you don't have any self restraint
Tom: oh no
Tom: *covers eyes*
Tom: lol i was reading ur profile
Tom: (to see myself, of course)
Tom: and realized that I was the one that asked Roger to winter formal
Tom: are you back home
Tom: have you returned from the forsaken lands to the north
Tom: the place called el capital
Tom: it shall never steal your loving presence from me again
Tom: i swear it on whatever i choose to swear it on
Joe: *rub*
Tom: yay
Tom: *gets short of breath*
Roger: ooo u touched my tralala
Roger: oooH! i got asked to wf! :-o
Joe: WHAT?!
Joe: DAMN IT!
Joe: SOMEONE ALWAYS TAKES THE CUTE ONES BEFORE I CAN!!!!
11/26/05
(alberto has the dubious honor of having the funniest response to my 11/21/05, 9:20 P.M. *rub* spamming, in which 17 people got rubbed, and Shivu got a *no rub*)
Joe: *rub*
Albert: *turns around, gets up...*
Albert: *slap!*
Albert: you homo...
Albert: <3
Joe: you're so cute and cuddly, there's NO WAY anyone can rub you too much
Biruke: joe
Biruke: if u dont stop ill knock u the FUCK out
Tom: when I wake up in your be.....i mean
Kurt: You know, I've just realized something.
Kurt: Your internet rubs are a wonderful thing.
Kurt: It allows you to get some of your daily gayness out, and I feel loved- without actually "feeling" loved.
Tom: remember when it wasn't weird to suck on a lollipop any way you wanted?
Joe: i really shouldn't be allowed to drive. my vision is so crappy.
Tom: yeah I know. you could almost close your eyes and see better.
10/27/05
Sandesh: I've been laughing for twelve minutes now. I really need a straight-jacket.
Joe: "Hey coach! We've got a great new ab-workout for Sandesh!! Hey David! Look at Sandesh!"
Tom: It's really kinda scary
Joe: awww, it's alright. Here, have a hug.
Joe: <(^_^)>
Joe: *hug*
Tom: thanks, I feel better *comforted smile*
Tom: how do you have so much physical contact with people on aim
Tom: it's unbelieveable
Tom: The laws of time and space can't contain you mr joseph
Tom: I salute you
Joe: haha. so profiled
Tom: YES!
Tom: thats what I've been working toward all night lol
Joe: well, you certainly can work it.
Tom: man, the ways I could interpret that lol
Tom: I hate the possibilities
Tom: each and every one
Joe: hahaha. profiled too hahaha
Tom: oh dang this is above and deyond my wildest dreams
Tom: the convo not you
Tom: calm down
Joe: mmmmm ... cocky
Wes: Joe ... cocky is an adjective ...
Wesley: Joe
Wesley: I saw in the news today
Wesley: that a bunch of gay men in san francisco
Wesley: were running around naked while carrying whips
Wesley: the guy they showed in the video was wearing a white thong and black kinky straps all over him
Wesley: it made me think of you at the moment.
Joe: < rub
Dan: Rub a dub dub
Dan: three men in a tub.
Dan: but that's on slow nights
Dan: lol
Dan: that's the slogan of a gay hotel in san francisco
10/04/05
Chris: go to sleep at 9 ... or else
Joe: kk
Chris: :O
Chris: :-)
*Chris signs off*
Joe: rubbly mubbly schmubbly
Shivu: ok ... don't ever do that again
Joe: hahahahahaha
Shivu: No, I'm serious...
Shivu: don't ever do that again
What the ...
http://www.1up.com/do/newsStory?cId=3143782
Type "miserable failure" in google, and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky." Whether or not it's true is sorta being debated, but it's still hilarious.
Sen. Joseph Biden, a Delaware Democrat, complained that Roberts' answers were so vague that both Republicans and Democrats thought he agreed with them.
Ryan: alright, then be there
Ryan: or be a triangle
Mr. Nick: who goes to chicago
Mr. Nick: honestly
Kedar: text messages received from paige in chicago:
Kedar: i have never seen so many gay men before in my life
Kedar: so please inform joe
Kedar: [end transmission]
Joe(3 hours later): WHAT
Kedar: lol
Joe: #1 - I'm not gay
Joe: #2 - I do not find gay men attractive
Joe: #3 - But God damn do I wish I was in Chicago right now.
Kedar: shutup
Kyle Hoops: I hate you.
Robby: haha, u replace the J in mikes last name, he becomes mike Luberg
Robby: he is like, RG Lube
Robby: his own brand
Joe: back
Joe: well, I thought about it, and, all my knowledge, experience beyond my years, ancient buddhist meditation techniques, and the magic 8 ball came up with one solution:
Joe: you got owned.
Dan: what you doing?
Joe: thinking of you
Dan: Good.
7/26/05
Ashley R: today at the mall, my friend and I were getting hit on by this creepy guy. it was just as creepy as when you hit on guys.
Dan: i don't think people think you're gay
Joe: I hope not
Joe: that might put a crimp in my social life
Biruke: i luw u jo
Biruke: ur sooo kool ur almost black in my eyes
Kedar: im sitting here wondering if you're gay
Kedar: i DARE you to go one day
Kedar: without making such a remark
Kedar: lol
Joe: alright, if i win
Joe: i get to rub u
Joe: deal?
Kedar(8:12:38 PM): no
Joe(8:12:47 PM): hahaha. that totally defeats the purpose
Kedar(8:12:47 PM): that defeats the purpose of the bet
Umair: no joe i wouldn't hook up with you
Robby: u know ur a geek when u make ur gf a paper tank for her birthday
Robby: and I dunno what you are if you even include a moveable turret ...
Umair: disgusten yet so seductive u r joseph
Kedar: just get an annual pass to knotts
Kedar: well I don't like squishy things
Kedar: that's for dam sure
Joe: so should I play FF X-2?
Dan: lol
Dan: no
Dan: its stupid
Joe: awwww ... might I like it though?
Dan: Maybe
Dan: If you're a homosexual!
Joe: so I'll like it
Joe: ...
Joe: I'll ... hate it ...
Biruke: Joe, you're a cool guy
Biruke: and I know you're not gay
Joe: haha. profiled
Biruke: WOOOHOOOO
Joe: lol
Biruke: I FEEL SPECIAL
7/5/05
Joe: WHAT
Joe: YOU ARE SO NOT INCLINED TO THE SAME SEX
Joe: WHAT THE HECK
Joe: DAGNABBIT
Dan: maybe not around you
Joe: BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, AND YOU'VE BEEN HOLDING OUT ON ME
Joe: ...
Dan: i only do around attractive guys
Dan: :D
Joe: (*&$()*!@^#*)&!()KJBSDB&*@B!NDS(*&#Q(KJL
Joe: *instant death*
Dan: Uh...
Dan: Pheonix down that shit?
Daniel: talk to you tomorrow
Joe: kk, night
Daniel: durka durka durka
Umair: honestly
Umair: i know ur not gay
Umair: so its all good
Joe: ***hope
Joe: ...
Umair: lolol
Joe: ******* KNOW
Umair: I could see u
Umair: in a few years
Umair: on a commercial
Umair: "Hi. I'm Joe Smith, and I'm a chronic masturbator."
Kedar: ew
Kedar: EW
Joe: UGH ...
Kedar: lol
Kedar: DONT GRUNT AND MENTION SLEEPOVERS AT THE SAME TIME
Kedar: and whatever you do
*Joe stops typing*
Joe: hm?
Kedar: don't make a gay joke outta this one
Joe: aw man ...
Paige: he pms's
Kedar (about an hour later): who's paigers talking about in ure profile
Joe: I can't lie to you. we were poking fun at a certain cuddly brownie
Joe: it was all in good jest though =P
Joe (5 minutes later): and kedar never speaks to me again ... smooth joe, real smooth ...
Kedar: haha it WAS me lol
Kedar: she's right
Kedar: i do PMS
Joe: hahah-- ... ... ~_~;; ... ummm ... profiled? ...
Kedar: well, not technically
Kedar: but ya know
Roger: im out to conquer new york
Roger: and all women within the state
Roger: that are attractive
Roger: and not beastly
Joe: lol ... profiled?
Roger: NO PROFILE MOMENT
Roger: I KEED I KEED
Roger: anyways, i'm gone
Joe: <3
Roger: Take me home to the paradise city
Joe: haha
Joe: =D
Roger: <3
6/26/05
Sandesh: because someone has a birthday party
Sandesh: that I don't want to go to
Joe: oh, Indian
Sandesh: some in-- ...
Joe: gotcha
Sandesh: I like how you automatically knew that
Dan: dude
Dan: you are ac/dc
Joe: *rub*
Brandon: *orgasm*
Albert: put me in your profile
Albert: hahaha
Joe: dude
Joe: nice guy
Joe: you need originality
Albert: your profile is like ... the hall of fame
Albert: you know people just randomly say the stupidest things to you, hoping they'll get in
Joe: well I sure hope that's not the case ... =P
Kedar: theres this line
Joe: what line?
Kedar: that one should not pass
Joe: oh
Joe: where?
Kedar: hahahah
Kedar: waaaaaaaaay past where you are
Kedar: THE LINE IS AN ANT TO YOU
Joe: is that bad?
06/23/05
Michelle: "soooooo profiled" ROFL
Michelle: you know the "this is a kodac moment" saying?
Michelle: instead of something like that, I use "profile moment"
Michelle: XP
Kedar: so you just admitted to being gay.
Kedar: alright
Kedar: cool
Joe: I'm just going to have to make up something for father's day...
Ryan: pshh you're goin to hell for not being a good son
Ryan: jk lol
Ryan: lovers can't go to hell
Joe: hahahahaha. soooo profiled
Ryan: lol. but its true!
Ryan: I mean, someone that luvs everyone, or at least tries to make love to everyone can't go to hell.
Ryan: lol
Dan: nah, you're 50% gay, 50% bi.
Dan: add the straightness anywhere that fits in the ratio
Joe: WTF?! haha. wait a second ... that means I'm ...
Dan: yeah, you're bihomosexual
Dan: the first of its kind
Dan: You prefer men, but you'd do both sexes
Joe: ROBBY
Robby: what?
Joe: You know what I just thought about?
Joe: Why didn't we
Robby: ?
Joe: go online
Joe: to look for java help?!?!
Robby: hahahahaha
Joe: O_O
Joe: honestly
Joe: think about it ...
Robby: yeea ........
Robby: haha
Joe: too bad the school year's over today ... dammit ... (and I'm still working on over-over-overdue AP Java assignments)
Robby: yuuuuup :-X
Joe: *rub rub*
Albert: I love you Joe.
Albert: Here, let ME rub you!
Albert: *rub rub*
Joe: ewwwwwww ... that feels weird ...
06/15/05
AXEffect1121 (10:15:14 PM): dont be gay on teh field
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:18 PM): oh yeah
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:19 PM): duh
AXEffect1121 (10:15:19 PM): lol
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:20 PM): lol
AXEffect1121 (10:15:28 PM): the other ppl r ur enemy
AXEffect1121 (10:15:30 PM): u wanna kill em
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:51 PM): well, here's how i look at it
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:59 PM): *ahem*
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:05 PM): although i've never played paintball ...
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:11 PM): 1) i'm damn athletic (well shit son, I BETTER be ...)
AXEffect1121 (10:16:16 PM): right
AXEffect1121 (10:16:23 PM): i concur
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:27 PM): 2) i know tactics from all the FPSes i play/I can think up tactics randomly on my feet. (If I can take an SAT cold ... =D ) Also, I kicked ass at Lasertag, but it always blew having to pretend not to "Run or Duck" whenever one of those bums came around. I can sprint and leap around as much as I want ... right?
AXEffect1121 (10:16:30 PM): yes
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:37 PM): (YES!) 3) i know how to lead and assist leaders
AXEffect1121 (10:16:44 PM): wonderful
AXEffect1121 (10:16:52 PM): and u like...brothely love in combat right?
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:54 PM): 4) when i want to compete, it's game over for the ****CENSOR***** (anti-nice guys) on the other team
XTreme Skater777 (10:17:36 PM): 5) the only love on the field of combat is that for the thrill of the honor and glory of victory
AXEffect1121 (10:17:48 PM): hallelujah
(Alright, that last part was total BS, I'll admit. but for a red-blooded americ-- ... chinese boy, it sure got him excited ... =P)
OnceUponaBrownie (6:42:36 PM): hey
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (6:42:36 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:20:10 PM): hey
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (9:20:10 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:20:13 PM): ok
OnceUponaBrownie (9:31:58 PM): ball boy!! where art thou!!
OnceUponaBrownie (9:33:46 PM): the one of curved desires?
OnceUponaBrownie (9:33:53 PM): are you present?
OnceUponaBrownie (9:35:38 PM): are you trapped in an interdimensional chasm?
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (9:35:38 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:36:36 PM): are you reaching for excellence
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:08 PM): unless you're tied up to a pole surrounded by man eating sharks which can jump over you
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:20 PM): in the middle of an ocean
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:48 PM): i have no clue where you are
Robby: hardass Robby: ENERGIZE!
Robby: *microwave noise*
Joe: *rub*
Kyle: ew
Joe: ... :'(
Avi: mmmm joe rubs, mmmm, i'm in heaven
Kedar: dead jesus
Kedar: er
Kedar: DEAR JESUS
Kedar: not dead. lol my bad
Robby: What do you DO with all of the cavities in this stuffed animal?! Put drugs in it?!
Michelle: ROBBY! That's a puppet!!!
Joe: Alright. You need to repopulate the Earth, and there's some magic technology that will turn you into a woman. I'm the only man left.
Joe: Would you do it?
Mike Yi: Let me thi... no
Mike: screw the earth
Joe: So precisely how the hell do you keep getting owned?
Kedar: random shiz
Kedar: she thinks me gving her my keys is her owning me lol
Kedar: then she does doughnuts in my car
Kedar: or tries to
Kevin (my tight cousin): that post you had on lj was f'in funny!!! :-)
Kevin: brownie+287hp 350z = burnt clutch
Kevin: no... = bad choice by joe
Joe: hahahahahha
Kevin: no ... = Joe is freakin retarded
Joe: hahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahaha
Kevin: NO... = JOE IS GONNA HAVE HIS ASS HANDED TO HIM BY MY UNCLE ONCE HE FINDS OUT
Ashley P: A friend would bail you out of jail. A BEST friend, however, would be sitting next to you saying, "That was SO DAMN COOL!"
Angelo: dude, ive noticed that the number of homosexual/gay quotes have drastically decreased in ur profile
Joe: hahahaha
Joe: thank god
Joe: hahahahahahahahha
Joe: well, they're sorta common now, so i'll just put up the good ones
Angelo: lol
Joe: i mean, you can only put up so many responses to "I love you." anyways
Angelo: word
06/02/05
XTreme Skater777 (11:24:18 PM): lol
XTreme Skater777 (11:26:44 PM): im going to sleep
XTreme Skater777 (11:26:45 PM): night
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:13 PM): no
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:15 PM): dont go to sleep
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:18 PM): the man will get you tonight
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:22 PM): fuck joe, im not even kidding
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:23 PM): get out.
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:29 PM): i just got a message
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:33 PM): mmmm
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:36 PM): really?
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:38 PM): noo joe
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:40 PM): a big, black man?
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:40 PM): dont.
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:43 PM): get out of the house
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:45 PM): ...
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:46 PM): dan
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:51 PM): ur really scaring me
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:52 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:54 PM): im not fucking kidding.
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:55 PM): is going on?
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:55 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:02 PM): this guy just called me
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:09 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:16 PM): and hes like, im going to get you, and im like.. who are you trying to reach
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:19 PM): and hes like, joe right?
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:25 PM): hahaha
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:27 PM): HAHA
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:28 PM): damn it
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:29 PM): i lost you
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:48 PM): haha
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:50 PM): you dick
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:51 PM): hahaha
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:57 PM): damn
(Yeah, theres no way in Hell I'm changing the names on that one ... *yawn* night everyone. <3)
5/30/05 (Dang it's been a while ...)
Angelo: *sigh* What was I thinking to ask YOU about hw
Ashley R: Did you know a bear hug translates to an Osso hug?! hahahaha ewwwwwww
Robby: Dude, I hate stairs
Robby: My house needs a grav lift
Avi: My love! sup biatch!
Avi: Dude, your profile is like my AIM convos home
Mike: How is my ...cough... lover doing
5/23/05
Tyler: You should have been there! All the guys were hugging and being kind of gay and stuff.
Joe: ... really? =(
Tyler: Just your style
Joe: ......................
Tyler: :-)
Avi: Yeah, but dude ... If chicks like it, and I like chicks, then therefore I like it.
(I hope no one else will get it, but ... WOOOOW AVI. WOW. Now This is what my sister wrote when she saw that in my profile ...)
Michelle: Does that mean girls like gay guys? or is he trying to say he's gay? Because then you can have a bf!
(...)
5/19/05
Wesley: Hey Joe ... leave Mary alone, she's supposed to be doing homework right now ...
(now switch to the Mary/Joe im)
Joe: MARY! DO YOUR HW!
Mary: damn that wes
Joe: <4 u too
Mary: *sigh* <4
Joe: you shoulda said "screw that wes"
Joe: I might've oblige--- HW! GO! NOW! <4
5/18/05
Shivu: anyone who has their computer break right now is screwed. The can't get it fixed for about a good week. star wars is like a national holiday for the nerd nation.
Ashley R: I think you should be Britney Spears for Halloween =D
Avinash: Like how long? 1 or 2 miles?
Joe: hmm
Joe: probably something easy
Avinash: YES!
Joe: like, 4 or 5 miles
Avinash: me no run wel--- ... WTF
Avinash: U CRAZY BITCH
Avi: kedar_gym
Avi: you sure?
Joe: hahahhaha. I'll knock him senseless if I need to. We needa give him a chest.
(we love you keddy!)
Avi: hahaha, two in one day = I'M AWESOME
(merry xmas! =D)
Mike: So
Joe: Yo
Mike: when are we gonna hook up?
Joe: WTF
Joe: hahahahhahahahahahahaha
Mike: what, you don't want to?
(That's Mike Yi btw)
Robby: You could always pretend that you were raised by wolves and have a story that features a variety of growls.
5/17/05
Joe: Do you have any Persian in you?
Dan: I wish I did.
Dan: ...
Dan: OMG ... did I just say that?!
Angelo: u think if i write about breaking my cousins nose with a light saber is believable?
Me: Hahahahahhaha DO IT! DUDE! hahahahha
Angelo: heres line 1
Angelo: A long, long time ago, in a state far, far away, an epic event was unfolding which ended in a tragic fashion
Kyle: absolutely
Kyle: not
(Wow ... THanks for putting me on a head trip there ... lol)
Me: I know, sheesh. Why couldn't one of us have been a girl?
Dan: ... joe. Don't Go There.
Joe: DUDE! You know it's true.
Dan: ... i guess. But I wouldn't dwell upon that.
Dan: I'm not getting a sex change.
Me: hey aaryn ... you know ... we could be friends with benefits ... O:-)
Aaryn: hahaha shame on you joe! haha it hasn't even been 5 min
Me: Damn ... you're right ... I went back to hitting on you in like ... 30 seconds ...
5/16/05
Michelle: wow seriously
Joe: what
Michelle: you and your friends
Joe: my profile?
Michelle: have the best conversations
Michelle: I love it ROFL
Biruke: You know I finished the run right?
(80 LAPS ON THE TRACK!! I LOVE BIRUKE!)
Kyle: I fucking heart Joe. <9 to the extreme
Joe: But that's like ... making out for a week ...
Kyle: ... two weeks
Shivu: I thought you said baby shopping
Joe: NO YOU IDIOT! BABE SHOPPING!
Joe: LIKE ... BABE = HOTTIE = MIKE JUBE--- ... FEMALES!
---------------------------------------------------------
Entries Entered Last Are at the Top.
(So I could have something in my profile for
a long time, so it's actually pretty old.)
---------------------------------------------------------
06/11/08
Tom (Away Message): whose feeling what?
Joe: I'm feeling you
Joe: clearly
Tom: how did I know exactly what you'd say?
Joe: because it'd be weirder if I said "you're feeling me"
Joe: at least I'm on top?
Tom: ...
Tom: I need to study
Joe: kk, bjoli
Tom: stop throwing your body at me
Joe: nevarrr
Joe: one of these days
Tom: haha
Tom: ...
Joe: <3
Joe: is it who's or whose?
Tom: what?
Joe: which is proper english?
Tom: ... I think they both are
Joe: who's (contraction for who is) vs. whose (who+posessive)
Tom: yeah
Tom: I know whose that is
Joe: so you mean "who's feeling what"?
Tom: yeah
Joe: not that I notice
Tom: as in: who is
Joe: exactly
Tom: contracted
Joe: much like its and it's
Joe: it's = it is
Tom: yeah
Joe: contraction
Tom: basically
Joe: so um.
Tom: ok
Joe: correct it
Tom: stop talking
Joe: then go back to hw
Joe: <3
Tom: there
Joe: bjoli
Tom (Away Message): who's feeling what?
Joe: that is quite chill, ol' chap
Travis: lol it is definitely colder than the average
Tom: you're a nerd
Tom: a big cuddly one
Joe: takes one to know one
Alex: Hey. I was at Circuit City this morning. Took me half an hour to do my price match.
Amanda: It doesn't at my store!!!
Alex: Your store doesn't have what I want anyway.
11/19/06
XT: Lance Bass is GAY!
Joe: I know
Joe: *wink*
06/05/06
Auto-Response from Joe: I'm playing Final Fantasy XI
Ashley R: You're my final fantasy
(I've taught her well)
For those of you that remember when I was playing Metal Gear Solid a few months ago, this is exactly what happens.
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/297383
Just try to tell me this isn't amazing:
http://www.satugo.com/
Tom: I need a good idea for a film
Joe: Big Boobies Vol. 43
Tom: that Chris and I can make
Joe: oh
Joe: damn
Tom: yeah...about that
Tom: Taylor and Joe duke it out over who has the real C cup
Tom: i mean
Joe: the winner gets Tom
Joe: the loser gets Chris?
Tom: ...
Tom: exactly
Tom: *wink*
Tom: i mean
Tom: ...
05/24/06
bipolartendencys: CHANGE YOUR PROFILE!!!
XTreme Skater777: <3
bipolartendencys: yeah yeah
bipolartendencys: dont think yu can love your way out of this one
[08:11.59] Adrienne: what is the wierdest response youv'e gotten back from one of thoes *rub* things
Brandon: so alex and I were talking...
Brandon:
Brandon: nooo the dl speed is going down
Brandon: STOP DOWNLOADING YAOI
Brandon: oh wait thats my end
Brandon: ok now its going up
Joe: oh dear
Joe: hahaha
Brandon: the rest
Brandon:
Alex: b-chang
Alex: tell that to joe
Brandon: i will submit it
Brandon: for his approval
Alex: you batard
Brandon: submission sent
Alex: lmao
Alex: did I ever tell you
Alex: I hate you sometimes
Joe: hahahahahaha
Joe: <3
Brandon: just wanted you to know
Brandon: ;P
Joe: night mr cutie
Joe: <3
Brandon: nite honeybuns
Brandon: lemme taste you in the mor-nin
4/23/06
Adrienne: can i IM you whenever I want?
Adrienne: HECK YES i CAN
Adrienne: because im adrienne.
Adrienne: bihatches aint got shiza on me
Ashley R: joe, you're a new breed. you're joemosexual
Alex: only go halfway too
Alex: so it's like
Alex: you feel it go
Alex: but then you're like, "it's not going deep enough"
Joe: i daresay. you're the first asian man to ever say, "it only goes in halfway."
Alex: that can be SO misquoted out of context
Alex: HOLY SHIT
Joe: What's your craziest fantasy?
Adrienne: hm
Adrienne: playing super smash bro's with joseph smith... *flutters eyelashes*
Joe: i'm thinking about starting up a trip to Japan over the summer
Joe: but we'll see
Kelly: Have fun crazy foreigner
Kelly: I can teach you how to pick up girls
Joe: alex stated his interest
Joe: haha
Joe: good
Joe: with my overconfidence and your techinique
Joe: alex will have plenty of pictures
Kelly: "ore wa SUGEE okane mochi" will prolly work
Kelly: that means you're SUPER rich
Joe: hahahahaha
Kelly: it's kind of a universal turn-on
Joe: alex is a universal turn-on
Kelly: no
Kelly: no he isn't
Joe: lol
Kelly: considering his type is small underaged Asian girls though, I think he might do well
3/21/06
AND THUS ENDS THE RECOVERY WEEK. *sigh*
Wes: joe lol my mom saw my airsoft gun today
Wes: dude it was crazy
Wes: she wasn't mad or anything
Wes: i told her, "uhh its not mine ...joe let me borrow it in acse we ever have an airsoft war...don't worry, plus its ages 16+ and i'm 16"
Wes: she was like, "ok you return it to joe whenever and no questions asked."
Wes: "you think you'd have learned your lesson after 8th grade..."
Wes: talk about luck...
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
GUYS DISTANCE TEAM:
Next week is 22 miles. FOR THE WHOLE WEEK. YES. TWENTY-TWO MILES. I LOVE RECOVERY WEEKS. (we were running high 40s/low 50s for the past 6 weeks)
Adrienne: PORKY MY BUTT
Joe: well .. yes, actually. that was the point of the whole statement.
XT: the beginning of your screen name is xt
XT: i thought you'd like to know
Joe: tom is a pretty good lay, so dun worry about that
XT: hahahaha
XT: alright thanks
XT: for the info.
Ashley R: hahaha oh joe... do you pay people to say weird things in your profile? i seriously can't imagine them that weird all the time
02/22/06
Roger: also, as a volunteer, I can make love to everyone's sister on the team
Joe: ...
Roger: don't worry i use protection sometimes
Alex: it'll be good for you to get into me
obby: duuuuuude, did u know Eckert loves SoaD???
Robby: it's okay
Robby: I'm sensitive too
Robby: That's why I kill stuff.
Chris C: i hate you
Joe: I love you too.
Chris C: no
Chris C: you can die
Joe: <3
Robby: but when i'm old, i intend to be a perv
(I'm showing Adrienne bash.org)
Adrienne: my friend seriously said this yesterday
Adrienne: he was like "what the fuck is wtf?"
Joe: THOMAS
Joe: I LOVE YOU IN A STRAIGHT WAY
Tom: sorry joe, but that's not enough
Joe: ...
Tom: ;-)
Joe: in a homos....
Joe: ...
Joe: oh my
Wes: I'm trying to do something
Joe: *someone...?
Wes: *Joe
Joe: profiled
Wes: i hope nobody gets the wrong idea about that statement, but i'm pretty sure they won't cuz it is in your profile and all..
Joe: sarcasm at it's finest
Alex: *shows me a picture of a fake magic card titled, "That Ass" that only has 1 ability: "Tap."*
Alex: Joe
Joe: Yo
Alex: i play That Ass
Alex: and i'll tap it
Joe: YEEAAaaaaaAAAaaHHHHhhHhh!
Alex: and end my turn.
Biruke: I could picture jo like freaking with guys instead of girls
Joe: biruke
Joe: that was a SHAMELESS attempt
Joe: to get in the profile
Joe: but I think it succeeded
Biruke: no im serious though
Biruke: lol haha like i seriously would picture u comin up on me and freaking with me
Biruke: then i turn around and notice and ull play it off like ur just walkin and trying to get through the crowd
01/03/06
Adrienne: my friend lauren, she was on the phone last night, the girl with the knife..really wants to meet you guys..
Adrienne: like REALLY wants to
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 18:13:54 2005
[06:13.55] djIhcoro: nigga
[06:13.55] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
[06:13.59] djIhcoro: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 18:14:58 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 19:32:41 2005
[07:32.43] djIhcoro: nigga nigga
[07:32.43] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 19:45:23 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sat Dec 31 20:44:10 2005
[08:44.14] djIhcoro: joe you eggroll
[08:44.15] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
[08:44.17] djIhcoro: return
[08:44.26] djIhcoro: because you never pick up your phone
Session Close (Joe): Sat Dec 31 20:45:02 2005
Session Start (djIhcoro:Joe): Sun Jan 01 00:09:04 2006
[12:09.10] djIhcoro: happy new year's negrotem
[12:09.10] *** Auto-response from Joe: <3
Session Close (Joe): Sun Jan 01 00:09:12 2006
Mike Yi: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Mike Yi: u big hunky sexy man
Dan: Happy New Years Gay Man who just turned 18.
Roger: ur making sweet gay love to chris huh on new years eve, u faggots
Kedar: y Put this in your profile if you or someone you know is fighting, has survived, or has died in a pokemon battle.
12/26/05
robby duncan just gave me 18 bags of swedish fish. oh damn.
Ashley: i can't believe its almost your birthday!!! are you having strippers?
Ashley: male onessss
Mike Yi: How come all your profile entires all are about you being gay? How about a few
Mike: JOE SMITH IS AWESOME!!!!
Joe: gosh
Joe: you and your irresistible shameless plugs
Mike: well I take i back. some are about ..... ........ robby not killing things, so i guess i was wrong.
Mike: but the majority are about......................guys.........................or being naked
Mike: take me out
Mike: is a great song
M: my name is mike jones
M: nigga what
M: i like to move it
J: WTF
J: negro
J: what
M: wtf am i saying? hahaha
M: u know
M: when u say irresistible shameless plugs
M: that sounds like a butt plug to me
J: *rub*
Robby: stickers suck balls
Joe: *sigh* if only
Robby: ...........
Robby: Joe would love playboy stickers then
Mike: you know how to make a boy blush
Joe: ...temple?
Joe: like ...
Joe: nudist temple?
Roger: like jews
Robby: man
Robby: i haven't killed something
Robby: in a good
Robby: like
Robby: 48 hours or so
Robby: that's unhealthy
Roger: hi2u
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (1:16:35 PM): <3
Roger: i like autoresponse joe, he's less homo
12/14/05
Roger: you don't speak english anymore, do you?
Roger: it's all just rubbish
Robby: at the top of Accelerator and Boomerang, I let out a cry in your name:
Joe: whaaa?!
Robby: "LLEEERROOOOOYYYYYYY JENKINNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS!!!!!!"
"There's no time to stop for gas, we're already late"
-- Karin Donker
Roger: i hate papers
Roger: i suck at grammar
Roger: and life
Joe: and pen15
Roger: its not eww to rub another guy but its eww to rub yourself
Joe: *rub*
The Shark: ..........................
The Shark: gues what time is it!!???!!?!?!?!
Joe: LICK THE SHARK TIME!
The Shark: hahaha
The Shark: whatever u want joe
Tom: joe if you verbalized the things you say online ...... you would get shot
The Shark: rub time
Roger: *soft but gentle rub*
12/06/05
Roger: *turns into woman*
Roger: hah now u don't want to rub
Joe: *rub*
Roger: damn...u go both ways
Mike Yi: joseph smith, whos that? just the manliest man on earth
Mike: not.......
Joe: so I can put Iron Maiden as one of my interests, right?
Mike Yi: sure sure
Mike Yi: don't say guys though
Mike Yi: it might hurt your chances
Biruke: i've given up on you
Biruke: rub all you want
Birkue: its useless to fight it
Long: what's a liberal art?
Joe: *rub*
Tom: *activate anti-rub suit*
Joe: damn ...
Tom: yeah, I've been thinking of that one for so long
(I swear, this is true)
Essay Typo: Rather than continuing on with a sport I hated, I discovered my true competitive love is rubbin--- ... running.
Tom at the CC Banquet: Our next senior hates work more than almost anyone I know. And yet ... he's the one that scheduled our frickin' 6 AM morning weight lifting practices ... Yes, we also wonder if Joe is insane.
Kedar: do you like wrestling?
Joe: no
Kedar: then quit.
Kedar: tada!
Tom: ur not going to college are you
Kedar: raunchily wonderful
Tom: I know you don't have any self restraint
Tom: oh no
Tom: *covers eyes*
Tom: lol i was reading ur profile
Tom: (to see myself, of course)
Tom: and realized that I was the one that asked Roger to winter formal
Tom: are you back home
Tom: have you returned from the forsaken lands to the north
Tom: the place called el capital
Tom: it shall never steal your loving presence from me again
Tom: i swear it on whatever i choose to swear it on
Joe: *rub*
Tom: yay
Tom: *gets short of breath*
Roger: ooo u touched my tralala
Roger: oooH! i got asked to wf! :-o
Joe: WHAT?!
Joe: DAMN IT!
Joe: SOMEONE ALWAYS TAKES THE CUTE ONES BEFORE I CAN!!!!
11/26/05
(alberto has the dubious honor of having the funniest response to my 11/21/05, 9:20 P.M. *rub* spamming, in which 17 people got rubbed, and Shivu got a *no rub*)
Joe: *rub*
Albert: *turns around, gets up...*
Albert: *slap!*
Albert: you homo...
Albert: <3
Joe: you're so cute and cuddly, there's NO WAY anyone can rub you too much
Biruke: joe
Biruke: if u dont stop ill knock u the FUCK out
Tom: when I wake up in your be.....i mean
Kurt: You know, I've just realized something.
Kurt: Your internet rubs are a wonderful thing.
Kurt: It allows you to get some of your daily gayness out, and I feel loved- without actually "feeling" loved.
Tom: remember when it wasn't weird to suck on a lollipop any way you wanted?
Joe: i really shouldn't be allowed to drive. my vision is so crappy.
Tom: yeah I know. you could almost close your eyes and see better.
10/27/05
Sandesh: I've been laughing for twelve minutes now. I really need a straight-jacket.
Joe: "Hey coach! We've got a great new ab-workout for Sandesh!! Hey David! Look at Sandesh!"
Tom: It's really kinda scary
Joe: awww, it's alright. Here, have a hug.
Joe: <(^_^)>
Joe: *hug*
Tom: thanks, I feel better *comforted smile*
Tom: how do you have so much physical contact with people on aim
Tom: it's unbelieveable
Tom: The laws of time and space can't contain you mr joseph
Tom: I salute you
Joe: haha. so profiled
Tom: YES!
Tom: thats what I've been working toward all night lol
Joe: well, you certainly can work it.
Tom: man, the ways I could interpret that lol
Tom: I hate the possibilities
Tom: each and every one
Joe: hahaha. profiled too hahaha
Tom: oh dang this is above and deyond my wildest dreams
Tom: the convo not you
Tom: calm down
Joe: mmmmm ... cocky
Wes: Joe ... cocky is an adjective ...
Wesley: Joe
Wesley: I saw in the news today
Wesley: that a bunch of gay men in san francisco
Wesley: were running around naked while carrying whips
Wesley: the guy they showed in the video was wearing a white thong and black kinky straps all over him
Wesley: it made me think of you at the moment.
Joe: < rub
Dan: Rub a dub dub
Dan: three men in a tub.
Dan: but that's on slow nights
Dan: lol
Dan: that's the slogan of a gay hotel in san francisco
10/04/05
Chris: go to sleep at 9 ... or else
Joe: kk
Chris: :O
Chris: :-)
*Chris signs off*
Joe: rubbly mubbly schmubbly
Shivu: ok ... don't ever do that again
Joe: hahahahahaha
Shivu: No, I'm serious...
Shivu: don't ever do that again
What the ...
http://www.1up.com/do/newsStory?cId=3143782
Type "miserable failure" in google, and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky." Whether or not it's true is sorta being debated, but it's still hilarious.
Sen. Joseph Biden, a Delaware Democrat, complained that Roberts' answers were so vague that both Republicans and Democrats thought he agreed with them.
Ryan: alright, then be there
Ryan: or be a triangle
Mr. Nick: who goes to chicago
Mr. Nick: honestly
Kedar: text messages received from paige in chicago:
Kedar: i have never seen so many gay men before in my life
Kedar: so please inform joe
Kedar: [end transmission]
Joe(3 hours later): WHAT
Kedar: lol
Joe: #1 - I'm not gay
Joe: #2 - I do not find gay men attractive
Joe: #3 - But God damn do I wish I was in Chicago right now.
Kedar: shutup
Kyle Hoops: I hate you.
Robby: haha, u replace the J in mikes last name, he becomes mike Luberg
Robby: he is like, RG Lube
Robby: his own brand
Joe: back
Joe: well, I thought about it, and, all my knowledge, experience beyond my years, ancient buddhist meditation techniques, and the magic 8 ball came up with one solution:
Joe: you got owned.
Dan: what you doing?
Joe: thinking of you
Dan: Good.
7/26/05
Ashley R: today at the mall, my friend and I were getting hit on by this creepy guy. it was just as creepy as when you hit on guys.
Dan: i don't think people think you're gay
Joe: I hope not
Joe: that might put a crimp in my social life
Biruke: i luw u jo
Biruke: ur sooo kool ur almost black in my eyes
Kedar: im sitting here wondering if you're gay
Kedar: i DARE you to go one day
Kedar: without making such a remark
Kedar: lol
Joe: alright, if i win
Joe: i get to rub u
Joe: deal?
Kedar(8:12:38 PM): no
Joe(8:12:47 PM): hahaha. that totally defeats the purpose
Kedar(8:12:47 PM): that defeats the purpose of the bet
Umair: no joe i wouldn't hook up with you
Robby: u know ur a geek when u make ur gf a paper tank for her birthday
Robby: and I dunno what you are if you even include a moveable turret ...
Umair: disgusten yet so seductive u r joseph
Kedar: just get an annual pass to knotts
Kedar: well I don't like squishy things
Kedar: that's for dam sure
Joe: so should I play FF X-2?
Dan: lol
Dan: no
Dan: its stupid
Joe: awwww ... might I like it though?
Dan: Maybe
Dan: If you're a homosexual!
Joe: so I'll like it
Joe: ...
Joe: I'll ... hate it ...
Biruke: Joe, you're a cool guy
Biruke: and I know you're not gay
Joe: haha. profiled
Biruke: WOOOHOOOO
Joe: lol
Biruke: I FEEL SPECIAL
7/5/05
Joe: WHAT
Joe: YOU ARE SO NOT INCLINED TO THE SAME SEX
Joe: WHAT THE HECK
Joe: DAGNABBIT
Dan: maybe not around you
Joe: BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, AND YOU'VE BEEN HOLDING OUT ON ME
Joe: ...
Dan: i only do around attractive guys
Dan: :D
Joe: (*&$()*!@^#*)&!()KJBSDB&*@B!NDS(*&#Q(KJL
Joe: *instant death*
Dan: Uh...
Dan: Pheonix down that shit?
Daniel: talk to you tomorrow
Joe: kk, night
Daniel: durka durka durka
Umair: honestly
Umair: i know ur not gay
Umair: so its all good
Joe: ***hope
Joe: ...
Umair: lolol
Joe: ******* KNOW
Umair: I could see u
Umair: in a few years
Umair: on a commercial
Umair: "Hi. I'm Joe Smith, and I'm a chronic masturbator."
Kedar: ew
Kedar: EW
Joe: UGH ...
Kedar: lol
Kedar: DONT GRUNT AND MENTION SLEEPOVERS AT THE SAME TIME
Kedar: and whatever you do
*Joe stops typing*
Joe: hm?
Kedar: don't make a gay joke outta this one
Joe: aw man ...
Paige: he pms's
Kedar (about an hour later): who's paigers talking about in ure profile
Joe: I can't lie to you. we were poking fun at a certain cuddly brownie
Joe: it was all in good jest though =P
Joe (5 minutes later): and kedar never speaks to me again ... smooth joe, real smooth ...
Kedar: haha it WAS me lol
Kedar: she's right
Kedar: i do PMS
Joe: hahah-- ... ... ~_~;; ... ummm ... profiled? ...
Kedar: well, not technically
Kedar: but ya know
Roger: im out to conquer new york
Roger: and all women within the state
Roger: that are attractive
Roger: and not beastly
Joe: lol ... profiled?
Roger: NO PROFILE MOMENT
Roger: I KEED I KEED
Roger: anyways, i'm gone
Joe: <3
Roger: Take me home to the paradise city
Joe: haha
Joe: =D
Roger: <3
6/26/05
Sandesh: because someone has a birthday party
Sandesh: that I don't want to go to
Joe: oh, Indian
Sandesh: some in-- ...
Joe: gotcha
Sandesh: I like how you automatically knew that
Dan: dude
Dan: you are ac/dc
Joe: *rub*
Brandon: *orgasm*
Albert: put me in your profile
Albert: hahaha
Joe: dude
Joe: nice guy
Joe: you need originality
Albert: your profile is like ... the hall of fame
Albert: you know people just randomly say the stupidest things to you, hoping they'll get in
Joe: well I sure hope that's not the case ... =P
Kedar: theres this line
Joe: what line?
Kedar: that one should not pass
Joe: oh
Joe: where?
Kedar: hahahah
Kedar: waaaaaaaaay past where you are
Kedar: THE LINE IS AN ANT TO YOU
Joe: is that bad?
06/23/05
Michelle: "soooooo profiled" ROFL
Michelle: you know the "this is a kodac moment" saying?
Michelle: instead of something like that, I use "profile moment"
Michelle: XP
Kedar: so you just admitted to being gay.
Kedar: alright
Kedar: cool
Joe: I'm just going to have to make up something for father's day...
Ryan: pshh you're goin to hell for not being a good son
Ryan: jk lol
Ryan: lovers can't go to hell
Joe: hahahahaha. soooo profiled
Ryan: lol. but its true!
Ryan: I mean, someone that luvs everyone, or at least tries to make love to everyone can't go to hell.
Ryan: lol
Dan: nah, you're 50% gay, 50% bi.
Dan: add the straightness anywhere that fits in the ratio
Joe: WTF?! haha. wait a second ... that means I'm ...
Dan: yeah, you're bihomosexual
Dan: the first of its kind
Dan: You prefer men, but you'd do both sexes
Joe: ROBBY
Robby: what?
Joe: You know what I just thought about?
Joe: Why didn't we
Robby: ?
Joe: go online
Joe: to look for java help?!?!
Robby: hahahahaha
Joe: O_O
Joe: honestly
Joe: think about it ...
Robby: yeea ........
Robby: haha
Joe: too bad the school year's over today ... dammit ... (and I'm still working on over-over-overdue AP Java assignments)
Robby: yuuuuup :-X
Joe: *rub rub*
Albert: I love you Joe.
Albert: Here, let ME rub you!
Albert: *rub rub*
Joe: ewwwwwww ... that feels weird ...
06/15/05
AXEffect1121 (10:15:14 PM): dont be gay on teh field
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:18 PM): oh yeah
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:19 PM): duh
AXEffect1121 (10:15:19 PM): lol
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:20 PM): lol
AXEffect1121 (10:15:28 PM): the other ppl r ur enemy
AXEffect1121 (10:15:30 PM): u wanna kill em
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:51 PM): well, here's how i look at it
XTreme Skater777 (10:15:59 PM): *ahem*
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:05 PM): although i've never played paintball ...
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:11 PM): 1) i'm damn athletic (well shit son, I BETTER be ...)
AXEffect1121 (10:16:16 PM): right
AXEffect1121 (10:16:23 PM): i concur
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:27 PM): 2) i know tactics from all the FPSes i play/I can think up tactics randomly on my feet. (If I can take an SAT cold ... =D ) Also, I kicked ass at Lasertag, but it always blew having to pretend not to "Run or Duck" whenever one of those bums came around. I can sprint and leap around as much as I want ... right?
AXEffect1121 (10:16:30 PM): yes
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:37 PM): (YES!) 3) i know how to lead and assist leaders
AXEffect1121 (10:16:44 PM): wonderful
AXEffect1121 (10:16:52 PM): and u like...brothely love in combat right?
XTreme Skater777 (10:16:54 PM): 4) when i want to compete, it's game over for the ****CENSOR***** (anti-nice guys) on the other team
XTreme Skater777 (10:17:36 PM): 5) the only love on the field of combat is that for the thrill of the honor and glory of victory
AXEffect1121 (10:17:48 PM): hallelujah
(Alright, that last part was total BS, I'll admit. but for a red-blooded americ-- ... chinese boy, it sure got him excited ... =P)
OnceUponaBrownie (6:42:36 PM): hey
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (6:42:36 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:20:10 PM): hey
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (9:20:10 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:20:13 PM): ok
OnceUponaBrownie (9:31:58 PM): ball boy!! where art thou!!
OnceUponaBrownie (9:33:46 PM): the one of curved desires?
OnceUponaBrownie (9:33:53 PM): are you present?
OnceUponaBrownie (9:35:38 PM): are you trapped in an interdimensional chasm?
Auto response from XTreme Skater777 (9:35:38 PM): I bailed somewhere really quick, I'll be back soon I sorta promise.
OnceUponaBrownie (9:36:36 PM): are you reaching for excellence
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:08 PM): unless you're tied up to a pole surrounded by man eating sharks which can jump over you
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:20 PM): in the middle of an ocean
OnceUponaBrownie (9:37:48 PM): i have no clue where you are
Robby: hardass Robby: ENERGIZE!
Robby: *microwave noise*
Joe: *rub*
Kyle: ew
Joe: ... :'(
Avi: mmmm joe rubs, mmmm, i'm in heaven
Kedar: dead jesus
Kedar: er
Kedar: DEAR JESUS
Kedar: not dead. lol my bad
Robby: What do you DO with all of the cavities in this stuffed animal?! Put drugs in it?!
Michelle: ROBBY! That's a puppet!!!
Joe: Alright. You need to repopulate the Earth, and there's some magic technology that will turn you into a woman. I'm the only man left.
Joe: Would you do it?
Mike Yi: Let me thi... no
Mike: screw the earth
Joe: So precisely how the hell do you keep getting owned?
Kedar: random shiz
Kedar: she thinks me gving her my keys is her owning me lol
Kedar: then she does doughnuts in my car
Kedar: or tries to
Kevin (my tight cousin): that post you had on lj was f'in funny!!! :-)
Kevin: brownie+287hp 350z = burnt clutch
Kevin: no... = bad choice by joe
Joe: hahahahahha
Kevin: no ... = Joe is freakin retarded
Joe: hahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahaha
Kevin: NO... = JOE IS GONNA HAVE HIS ASS HANDED TO HIM BY MY UNCLE ONCE HE FINDS OUT
Ashley P: A friend would bail you out of jail. A BEST friend, however, would be sitting next to you saying, "That was SO DAMN COOL!"
Angelo: dude, ive noticed that the number of homosexual/gay quotes have drastically decreased in ur profile
Joe: hahahaha
Joe: thank god
Joe: hahahahahahahahha
Joe: well, they're sorta common now, so i'll just put up the good ones
Angelo: lol
Joe: i mean, you can only put up so many responses to "I love you." anyways
Angelo: word
06/02/05
XTreme Skater777 (11:24:18 PM): lol
XTreme Skater777 (11:26:44 PM): im going to sleep
XTreme Skater777 (11:26:45 PM): night
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:13 PM): no
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:15 PM): dont go to sleep
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:18 PM): the man will get you tonight
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:22 PM): fuck joe, im not even kidding
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:23 PM): get out.
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:29 PM): i just got a message
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:33 PM): mmmm
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:36 PM): really?
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:38 PM): noo joe
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:40 PM): a big, black man?
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:40 PM): dont.
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:43 PM): get out of the house
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:45 PM): ...
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:46 PM): dan
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:51 PM): ur really scaring me
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:52 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:27:54 PM): im not fucking kidding.
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:55 PM): is going on?
XTreme Skater777 (11:27:55 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:02 PM): this guy just called me
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:09 PM): what
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:16 PM): and hes like, im going to get you, and im like.. who are you trying to reach
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:19 PM): and hes like, joe right?
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:25 PM): hahaha
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:27 PM): HAHA
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:28 PM): damn it
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:29 PM): i lost you
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:48 PM): haha
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:50 PM): you dick
XTreme Skater777 (11:28:51 PM): hahaha
KrNRiCeBoi29 (11:28:57 PM): damn
(Yeah, theres no way in Hell I'm changing the names on that one ... *yawn* night everyone. <3)
5/30/05 (Dang it's been a while ...)
Angelo: *sigh* What was I thinking to ask YOU about hw
Ashley R: Did you know a bear hug translates to an Osso hug?! hahahaha ewwwwwww
Robby: Dude, I hate stairs
Robby: My house needs a grav lift
Avi: My love! sup biatch!
Avi: Dude, your profile is like my AIM convos home
Mike: How is my ...cough... lover doing
5/23/05
Tyler: You should have been there! All the guys were hugging and being kind of gay and stuff.
Joe: ... really? =(
Tyler: Just your style
Joe: ......................
Tyler: :-)
Avi: Yeah, but dude ... If chicks like it, and I like chicks, then therefore I like it.
(I hope no one else will get it, but ... WOOOOW AVI. WOW. Now This is what my sister wrote when she saw that in my profile ...)
Michelle: Does that mean girls like gay guys? or is he trying to say he's gay? Because then you can have a bf!
(...)
5/19/05
Wesley: Hey Joe ... leave Mary alone, she's supposed to be doing homework right now ...
(now switch to the Mary/Joe im)
Joe: MARY! DO YOUR HW!
Mary: damn that wes
Joe: <4 u too
Mary: *sigh* <4
Joe: you shoulda said "screw that wes"
Joe: I might've oblige--- HW! GO! NOW! <4
5/18/05
Shivu: anyone who has their computer break right now is screwed. The can't get it fixed for about a good week. star wars is like a national holiday for the nerd nation.
Ashley R: I think you should be Britney Spears for Halloween =D
Avinash: Like how long? 1 or 2 miles?
Joe: hmm
Joe: probably something easy
Avinash: YES!
Joe: like, 4 or 5 miles
Avinash: me no run wel--- ... WTF
Avinash: U CRAZY BITCH
Avi: kedar_gym
Avi: you sure?
Joe: hahahhaha. I'll knock him senseless if I need to. We needa give him a chest.
(we love you keddy!)
Avi: hahaha, two in one day = I'M AWESOME
(merry xmas! =D)
Mike: So
Joe: Yo
Mike: when are we gonna hook up?
Joe: WTF
Joe: hahahahhahahahahahahaha
Mike: what, you don't want to?
(That's Mike Yi btw)
Robby: You could always pretend that you were raised by wolves and have a story that features a variety of growls.
5/17/05
Joe: Do you have any Persian in you?
Dan: I wish I did.
Dan: ...
Dan: OMG ... did I just say that?!
Angelo: u think if i write about breaking my cousins nose with a light saber is believable?
Me: Hahahahahhaha DO IT! DUDE! hahahahha
Angelo: heres line 1
Angelo: A long, long time ago, in a state far, far away, an epic event was unfolding which ended in a tragic fashion
Kyle: absolutely
Kyle: not
(Wow ... THanks for putting me on a head trip there ... lol)
Me: I know, sheesh. Why couldn't one of us have been a girl?
Dan: ... joe. Don't Go There.
Joe: DUDE! You know it's true.
Dan: ... i guess. But I wouldn't dwell upon that.
Dan: I'm not getting a sex change.
Me: hey aaryn ... you know ... we could be friends with benefits ... O:-)
Aaryn: hahaha shame on you joe! haha it hasn't even been 5 min
Me: Damn ... you're right ... I went back to hitting on you in like ... 30 seconds ...
5/16/05
Michelle: wow seriously
Joe: what
Michelle: you and your friends
Joe: my profile?
Michelle: have the best conversations
Michelle: I love it ROFL
Biruke: You know I finished the run right?
(80 LAPS ON THE TRACK!! I LOVE BIRUKE!)
Kyle: I fucking heart Joe. <9 to the extreme
Joe: But that's like ... making out for a week ...
Kyle: ... two weeks
Shivu: I thought you said baby shopping
Joe: NO YOU IDIOT! BABE SHOPPING!
Joe: LIKE ... BABE = HOTTIE = MIKE JUBE--- ... FEMALES!