Study....
What else is there to do at 10pm on Tuesday? I can actually think of a number of things I'd rather be doing... oh well.
Renal module is ok, a ton better and more interesting than Respiratory, which kicked my ass. Eh. Starting to worry more about Step 1 than grades, and hoping that research (if I ever get to finish my project) and my endless list of activities will keep me ahead of the game nontheless. It's a constant battle in my mind between what I love and what I think matters to a good program. I hate this game, this rat race, this madness that I thought (naively, now that I think about it) would end when I got my acceptance letter to UM.
I feel that even though I have the opportunity and material to review for Step 1 as I go, I still don't have the time. Plus, trying to balance my activities (getting a tad easier now that I have more help) and getting to the gym more, not to mention trying to relax/sleep more so I don't go crazy, added to my new goal of weekly voice lessons... well, you get the picture. I refuse to give up my life, though, and I just pray that's the right decision in the end. Overall, this year is no less busy and ridiculous than the last. Just in different ways. Sigh.
I realize I sound like a broken record a lot. I swear, the more things change the more they stay the same, and I'm getting kind of sick of that. I want actual change. I want to make differences in my own life and the lives of others. I want to see progress and forward movement. I want Obama to be president. ;) I have a lot more ideals than most medical students, and it's sad that my current environement tends to bring me down more than I deserve. It's hard to remain optimistic in the face of all the obstacles ahead in my path, and this coming from the queen of rose-colored glasses. I hate being jaded and cynical... but I'm getting that way. Or at least moreso than I used to be. And I don't like it one bit.
So it goes. Hopefully the coming months will bring some progress. And hopefully I will continue to find my bearings. 'til next time <3
Renal module is ok, a ton better and more interesting than Respiratory, which kicked my ass. Eh. Starting to worry more about Step 1 than grades, and hoping that research (if I ever get to finish my project) and my endless list of activities will keep me ahead of the game nontheless. It's a constant battle in my mind between what I love and what I think matters to a good program. I hate this game, this rat race, this madness that I thought (naively, now that I think about it) would end when I got my acceptance letter to UM.
I feel that even though I have the opportunity and material to review for Step 1 as I go, I still don't have the time. Plus, trying to balance my activities (getting a tad easier now that I have more help) and getting to the gym more, not to mention trying to relax/sleep more so I don't go crazy, added to my new goal of weekly voice lessons... well, you get the picture. I refuse to give up my life, though, and I just pray that's the right decision in the end. Overall, this year is no less busy and ridiculous than the last. Just in different ways. Sigh.
I realize I sound like a broken record a lot. I swear, the more things change the more they stay the same, and I'm getting kind of sick of that. I want actual change. I want to make differences in my own life and the lives of others. I want to see progress and forward movement. I want Obama to be president. ;) I have a lot more ideals than most medical students, and it's sad that my current environement tends to bring me down more than I deserve. It's hard to remain optimistic in the face of all the obstacles ahead in my path, and this coming from the queen of rose-colored glasses. I hate being jaded and cynical... but I'm getting that way. Or at least moreso than I used to be. And I don't like it one bit.
So it goes. Hopefully the coming months will bring some progress. And hopefully I will continue to find my bearings. 'til next time <3