(no subject)
SO HEY,
Springtime in Tallahasse is this saturday!!! A concert Gala featuring Tod Agnew, Barlow Girl, and Warren Barfield...* sings... im so excited, I jus cant hide it* So anyways, GOD! He has definetly been speaking to me the last couple of days. Ive just been realizing how much ive been trying to find validation of my worth in the world. This can be found in the ammount of things ive been doing to do so, quite embarrasing really. BUT in the past couple of weeks I have joined... loveandseek.com, buddypic.com, and BigChurch.com... All ways to see if others think Im somewhat interesting, perty, smart? But I've realized...um, why? Ive had so many problems with self-image and self worth my whole life and I guess it could all be attributed to one incident in elementary school. lol ya, im going to share it! I was at recess? And we were all playing to classic game of "chase" the boys would chase the girls around, etc... And so they were all chasing after this one cute, perty, popular girl, and I thought it was way past time for her turn to be over. I was playing with them and carrying on, and I scream, HEY, chase me now! And the ring leader was like.. "im not gonna chase u, your too fat and ugly." And I can remember how dejected I felt and I guess thats had a lasting affect on me. I wanted soo much to be chased by those dirty, rude, ugly boys, and it hurt me when they rejected me. But what a paradigm! Isnt that what we do when we seek after the worlds approval and then dont get it? We go after that pimple faced twirp of a world for acceptance and validation of our worth and then when we dont get it were like... whats wrong with me!? Wow Whats wrong with you is right! WHY, Why are u going after dirt when you can have rubies? Its like trusting an iggnorant persons opinion of the "ugliness" of a beautiful work of art, and ignoring the praise of the creator! Last night God spoke to me in the midst of the Devil's lies and stopped satan dead in his tracks... It was like, Nichole, no more. THIS... look at the cross! THIS, THIS is how much you mean to me! THAT is more than enough Nichole, I love you, and I think you are amazing and beautiful and priceless... and tonight at Wesley, He gave me this verse.
"How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from God." John 5:44
Wow, How can I so easliy accept the praise from the world, and just as easliy forget the promises of his undying devotion, etc... Nichole, you cannnot claim Victory untill you start claiming my promises! And the praise of the world is temporal and not full of blessing. My worth is based on something that is eternal,and my validation of that is in God's word. I need only to look to Him. (Hebews 12:2)
Love you Daddy.
Springtime in Tallahasse is this saturday!!! A concert Gala featuring Tod Agnew, Barlow Girl, and Warren Barfield...* sings... im so excited, I jus cant hide it* So anyways, GOD! He has definetly been speaking to me the last couple of days. Ive just been realizing how much ive been trying to find validation of my worth in the world. This can be found in the ammount of things ive been doing to do so, quite embarrasing really. BUT in the past couple of weeks I have joined... loveandseek.com, buddypic.com, and BigChurch.com... All ways to see if others think Im somewhat interesting, perty, smart? But I've realized...um, why? Ive had so many problems with self-image and self worth my whole life and I guess it could all be attributed to one incident in elementary school. lol ya, im going to share it! I was at recess? And we were all playing to classic game of "chase" the boys would chase the girls around, etc... And so they were all chasing after this one cute, perty, popular girl, and I thought it was way past time for her turn to be over. I was playing with them and carrying on, and I scream, HEY, chase me now! And the ring leader was like.. "im not gonna chase u, your too fat and ugly." And I can remember how dejected I felt and I guess thats had a lasting affect on me. I wanted soo much to be chased by those dirty, rude, ugly boys, and it hurt me when they rejected me. But what a paradigm! Isnt that what we do when we seek after the worlds approval and then dont get it? We go after that pimple faced twirp of a world for acceptance and validation of our worth and then when we dont get it were like... whats wrong with me!? Wow Whats wrong with you is right! WHY, Why are u going after dirt when you can have rubies? Its like trusting an iggnorant persons opinion of the "ugliness" of a beautiful work of art, and ignoring the praise of the creator! Last night God spoke to me in the midst of the Devil's lies and stopped satan dead in his tracks... It was like, Nichole, no more. THIS... look at the cross! THIS, THIS is how much you mean to me! THAT is more than enough Nichole, I love you, and I think you are amazing and beautiful and priceless... and tonight at Wesley, He gave me this verse.
"How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from God." John 5:44
Wow, How can I so easliy accept the praise from the world, and just as easliy forget the promises of his undying devotion, etc... Nichole, you cannnot claim Victory untill you start claiming my promises! And the praise of the world is temporal and not full of blessing. My worth is based on something that is eternal,and my validation of that is in God's word. I need only to look to Him. (Hebews 12:2)
Love you Daddy.