Cosmic Conspiracy
From "Free Will Astrology" by Rob Brezny
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Mahatma Gandhi said that "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." You are maybe as close as you've ever been to achieving that mythical state. I'm tempted to say that there's a cosmic conspiracy working to unify elements of your life that have long been at odds. Fragments are weaving themselves together as if directed by a power that's beyond your conscious awareness. Contradictions that have at times threatened to make you feel like a hypocrite are tantalizingly close to melting away. I urge you to drop everything, Capricorn, so that you may give yourself fully to an intense collaboration with this cosmic conspiracy.
I love Rob Brezny's horoscopes because they read to me like really short stories, or transcripts of abbreviated voicemails. I don't expect his predictions to come true, but I sometimes like to pretend that his messages soundtrack my life on any particular week. I think it's because he usually incorporates a recap of an event from his life, or advice from a personal friend of his (not this week, I know) into each horoscope. My favourite was when he worked in an anecdote about his "toxic" ex-girlfriend and explained to his Capricorn readers that what we all really needed was a dose of her toxicity to break down our lives. He always advises Capricorns to break down, "drop everything," and de-compose, because the forces that work against us in every column will soon be thwarted in favour of recomposition and fulfillment of true Capricorn dreams. Each week's horoscope has a happy ending, just like I like my stories.
This past month has been one long pattern of a night's sleep for every two nights of insomnia for me. Last night was sleepless again and early this morning I skimmed through all of my old journals and notebooks, save for the high school one tragically lost in an indirect encounter with my ex-roommate's father. Years and years, pages and pages and even through skimming I noticed the same words repeating in every book. Maybe that's the real reason I like Rob Brezny's horoscopes: because the themes of my life and dreams never change either, and I'm counting on that happy ending.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Mahatma Gandhi said that "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." You are maybe as close as you've ever been to achieving that mythical state. I'm tempted to say that there's a cosmic conspiracy working to unify elements of your life that have long been at odds. Fragments are weaving themselves together as if directed by a power that's beyond your conscious awareness. Contradictions that have at times threatened to make you feel like a hypocrite are tantalizingly close to melting away. I urge you to drop everything, Capricorn, so that you may give yourself fully to an intense collaboration with this cosmic conspiracy.
I love Rob Brezny's horoscopes because they read to me like really short stories, or transcripts of abbreviated voicemails. I don't expect his predictions to come true, but I sometimes like to pretend that his messages soundtrack my life on any particular week. I think it's because he usually incorporates a recap of an event from his life, or advice from a personal friend of his (not this week, I know) into each horoscope. My favourite was when he worked in an anecdote about his "toxic" ex-girlfriend and explained to his Capricorn readers that what we all really needed was a dose of her toxicity to break down our lives. He always advises Capricorns to break down, "drop everything," and de-compose, because the forces that work against us in every column will soon be thwarted in favour of recomposition and fulfillment of true Capricorn dreams. Each week's horoscope has a happy ending, just like I like my stories.
This past month has been one long pattern of a night's sleep for every two nights of insomnia for me. Last night was sleepless again and early this morning I skimmed through all of my old journals and notebooks, save for the high school one tragically lost in an indirect encounter with my ex-roommate's father. Years and years, pages and pages and even through skimming I noticed the same words repeating in every book. Maybe that's the real reason I like Rob Brezny's horoscopes: because the themes of my life and dreams never change either, and I'm counting on that happy ending.