I spent the day thinking about your post, because I wasn't quite sure what to say. I wish I did. I've been going through some stuff with my parents too over the past couple of years, mostly my mom, and for me, a lot of it is just knowing that she's struggling with her own issues.
In the scheme of things, she's been an awesome mom. That doesn't change the fact that there's still hurt there, though. It scares me, too, because I see a lot of her in me -- her positive qualities, and the qualities I wish to God I could erase. I can't change her, so I have to love her for who she is, and focus on myself.
There's a long line of dysfunctional women in my family, and as much as I like to use them for comical fodder, they're not who I want to be. But one thing I've realized is that our parents don't define the people we will become. I don't have to turn into my mother, and you don't have to let your relationship with your father keep you from having the boys lined up around the block. It's going to take a lot of soul-searching for the both of us, but it's the only way we can live happier lives, so it's gotta be worth it.
Aw Lo, that was really nice. You're right though, I guess it will take some soul searching. I didn't really look at it that way. I guess that's what college is for. I'm kinda excited for it, but at the same time I feel kinda guilty for leaving my mom. Well, that's considering I actually pass English LOL I never thought I'd ever have to worry about actually passing a class. It feel interesting. I hope I don't get used to it. Anywaz.....thanx for being such a great friend Lo!
In the scheme of things, she's been an awesome mom. That doesn't change the fact that there's still hurt there, though. It scares me, too, because I see a lot of her in me -- her positive qualities, and the qualities I wish to God I could erase. I can't change her, so I have to love her for who she is, and focus on myself.
There's a long line of dysfunctional women in my family, and as much as I like to use them for comical fodder, they're not who I want to be. But one thing I've realized is that our parents don't define the people we will become. I don't have to turn into my mother, and you don't have to let your relationship with your father keep you from having the boys lined up around the block. It's going to take a lot of soul-searching for the both of us, but it's the only way we can live happier lives, so it's gotta be worth it.
I<3KC.
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You're right though, I guess it will take some soul searching.
I didn't really look at it that way.
I guess that's what college is for.
I'm kinda excited for it, but at the same time I feel kinda guilty for leaving my mom.
Well, that's considering I actually pass English LOL
I never thought I'd ever have to worry about actually passing a class. It feel interesting. I hope I don't get used to it.
Anywaz.....thanx for being such a great friend Lo!
<3
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