@#$&&%$#
Ok. SO. Heres the long and shirt version.
Jeff and I have been dating just a little under a year. We moved in together this past January. Since we moved in things have changed drastically. I'm almost never home, I'm always either at work, out with friends, or just somewhere other than here. Jeff would rather be here than anywhere. Ick.
I think it has alot to do with the age difference. I'm a big kid, a giant goof ball. I like to sit around and do nothing but laugh at nothing. Sit and smoke cigarettes till we die of boredom or need to go to the store for more cigarettes. I like to play pool with friends or even just be with them. I dont necesarily seem like a very social person, but I like being near people, watching, laughing, just enjoying everyone.
Jeff would rather sit at home and read comics. Play video games. See a movie, and then go to the arcade. These are small things.
When he has a rough day at work I'm here to comfort him, listen to his day, take whatever verbal beating he unconciously doles out because I know that its his way of de-stressing after a very long day. He doesnt want to be touched? Thats fine. The apartment is a pig stye? Ok, I'll clean it up a bit just to calm you down. Feet hurt? Lemme rub them for you, I know you work alot on your feet.
When I have a long day? I still do all this for him, because nothing is done for me. I have to stem my anger or I get "thrown out of the truck" or threatened that we'll have to go home unless I cool off. Well excuse fucking me! I'm so fucking sorry that you dont think my job is worth the amount of stress I come home with but it is and sometimes you need to be a good fucking bf and just fucking deal!
I'm not fucking happy ok. I still feel like I'm living with a parent. Except we have sex sometimes. Woop-de-fuckin-do. And thats not all of it. Its alot of things.
I have enough stress at work, and when I come home I need to relax same as you do. I've done it for a long time, making sure you were cool when you got home. Wanna do me a favor and indulge me maybe? Just shut the fuck up and let me rant and rave like I do for you? Perhaps just fucking ignore me but let me rant? Anything but bitch. Stop fucking bitching at me for trying to expell the stress of work, you and the bills.
You stress me out. I'm afraid to leave but this isnt going anywhere. I dont know what the fuck this is, but it defenitely isn't what it once was. God I'm so damned tired. Physically. Stress is just so damn tiring. I just want to go back to bed so bad. Just skip work and sleep. I can't though. Unless I'm falling down I need to be at work. You saw it last night. I got up, I did my paper work even though I fell. I put on those god damned heels and I marched my ass out that building. I am not a little shit. I've got more strength mentally and emotionally then you ever could. I'm just very stressed. My mind may be fine, but if my body is dying because of my mind, what am I to do? I can only force myself to have so much energy. After that I may as well be on the floor.
Jeff and I have been dating just a little under a year. We moved in together this past January. Since we moved in things have changed drastically. I'm almost never home, I'm always either at work, out with friends, or just somewhere other than here. Jeff would rather be here than anywhere. Ick.
I think it has alot to do with the age difference. I'm a big kid, a giant goof ball. I like to sit around and do nothing but laugh at nothing. Sit and smoke cigarettes till we die of boredom or need to go to the store for more cigarettes. I like to play pool with friends or even just be with them. I dont necesarily seem like a very social person, but I like being near people, watching, laughing, just enjoying everyone.
Jeff would rather sit at home and read comics. Play video games. See a movie, and then go to the arcade. These are small things.
When he has a rough day at work I'm here to comfort him, listen to his day, take whatever verbal beating he unconciously doles out because I know that its his way of de-stressing after a very long day. He doesnt want to be touched? Thats fine. The apartment is a pig stye? Ok, I'll clean it up a bit just to calm you down. Feet hurt? Lemme rub them for you, I know you work alot on your feet.
When I have a long day? I still do all this for him, because nothing is done for me. I have to stem my anger or I get "thrown out of the truck" or threatened that we'll have to go home unless I cool off. Well excuse fucking me! I'm so fucking sorry that you dont think my job is worth the amount of stress I come home with but it is and sometimes you need to be a good fucking bf and just fucking deal!
I'm not fucking happy ok. I still feel like I'm living with a parent. Except we have sex sometimes. Woop-de-fuckin-do. And thats not all of it. Its alot of things.
I have enough stress at work, and when I come home I need to relax same as you do. I've done it for a long time, making sure you were cool when you got home. Wanna do me a favor and indulge me maybe? Just shut the fuck up and let me rant and rave like I do for you? Perhaps just fucking ignore me but let me rant? Anything but bitch. Stop fucking bitching at me for trying to expell the stress of work, you and the bills.
You stress me out. I'm afraid to leave but this isnt going anywhere. I dont know what the fuck this is, but it defenitely isn't what it once was. God I'm so damned tired. Physically. Stress is just so damn tiring. I just want to go back to bed so bad. Just skip work and sleep. I can't though. Unless I'm falling down I need to be at work. You saw it last night. I got up, I did my paper work even though I fell. I put on those god damned heels and I marched my ass out that building. I am not a little shit. I've got more strength mentally and emotionally then you ever could. I'm just very stressed. My mind may be fine, but if my body is dying because of my mind, what am I to do? I can only force myself to have so much energy. After that I may as well be on the floor.