Wear the grudge like a crown of negativity...Desperate to control all and everything.
To clear up the situation on what happened with Mike. This is what happened...
I broke up with Mike before we found out I was pregnant. I broke up with him because I was tired of not ever being good enough no matter how much I changed for him. No matter how hard I tried my efforts went unrecognized and never mattered. I loved him so much. I couldn't imagin life without him because he was all I wanted. I really wanted nothing more than Mike and to make him happy and I tried to be the absolutle perfect girlfriend. We argued about things and whatever but it never actually mattered because I still wanted him and us. I can't stand meaning nothing to someone though. Mike didn't treat me like I mattered or had any type of signifigance in his life. So I ended it and we became just friends.
On October 16th Joe and I started dating. Then, while Joe and I were together I found out I was pregnant. Mike said he wanted to take responsibiity and be a father and I thought it was only right to give him another chance. Joe wanted to stay with me and be there for the baby. I broke up with Joe and Mike and I tried again...for about a week.
We both came to the understanding it wasnt going to happen. I started hooking up with Joe again...not dating for a while because I wanted to sure that this was a good idea for the both of us. I also wanted it not to be a rebound thing. Joe and I didn't start dating until later in November. During all that time in between Mike and I fought like all hell because he didn't want to have any responsibility until the baby was born. I asked him -as a friend- to support me a little because this is hard, especially without him. He said -and I fucking quote- "I don't have to support you. I don't any part of you. My only responsibility is to the baby when she is born. And all I have to do is pay for things."
From then on I decided if he wants no responsibility then I won't put any on him any more. There is by far more to the story to back up why this all happened. As far as I am concerned he is nothing to me or my child. He wants no part in her growing inside me and wants nothing to do with me. Yes, he actuallty told me that. He will not be there at the hospital and no one will tell him to come. He will not be informed when the baby is born and I don't want him to be around her. I don't want child support and I don't want his negative influence on my baby. Mike has never been happy since the day I met him and he will never be happy. He will not steal happiness from my baby.
I don't care if he wants to be around after she's born because he can't just pick up from there. If he wanted to be part of her life he would have started 2 months ago. No court would ever give him partial custody and I don't ever want to let him or his fucked up family near my child and poison her in any way. I am fucking out of my first trimester already. Where the fuck was Mike every time I got pains, or was sick, or couldn't eat, or sleep, or stop crying because it hurt so bad he gave up on me and my baby. I can tell you. At home playing fucking video games because that is all that fucking matters to him. Who was there holding me through everything telling me it's alright and he loves me and my little baby...Joe. Joe has been a father to my child and it isn't even his. Joe is not my babys father and never will be. My baby has no father and will be a better person for it.
I AM FUCKING BITTER TOWARDS HIM AND I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE. He blew it. She is not his baby. This child is my life and I will do anything to make her life better. Even if that means Mike won't be in it.
I broke up with Mike before we found out I was pregnant. I broke up with him because I was tired of not ever being good enough no matter how much I changed for him. No matter how hard I tried my efforts went unrecognized and never mattered. I loved him so much. I couldn't imagin life without him because he was all I wanted. I really wanted nothing more than Mike and to make him happy and I tried to be the absolutle perfect girlfriend. We argued about things and whatever but it never actually mattered because I still wanted him and us. I can't stand meaning nothing to someone though. Mike didn't treat me like I mattered or had any type of signifigance in his life. So I ended it and we became just friends.
On October 16th Joe and I started dating. Then, while Joe and I were together I found out I was pregnant. Mike said he wanted to take responsibiity and be a father and I thought it was only right to give him another chance. Joe wanted to stay with me and be there for the baby. I broke up with Joe and Mike and I tried again...for about a week.
We both came to the understanding it wasnt going to happen. I started hooking up with Joe again...not dating for a while because I wanted to sure that this was a good idea for the both of us. I also wanted it not to be a rebound thing. Joe and I didn't start dating until later in November. During all that time in between Mike and I fought like all hell because he didn't want to have any responsibility until the baby was born. I asked him -as a friend- to support me a little because this is hard, especially without him. He said -and I fucking quote- "I don't have to support you. I don't any part of you. My only responsibility is to the baby when she is born. And all I have to do is pay for things."
From then on I decided if he wants no responsibility then I won't put any on him any more. There is by far more to the story to back up why this all happened. As far as I am concerned he is nothing to me or my child. He wants no part in her growing inside me and wants nothing to do with me. Yes, he actuallty told me that. He will not be there at the hospital and no one will tell him to come. He will not be informed when the baby is born and I don't want him to be around her. I don't want child support and I don't want his negative influence on my baby. Mike has never been happy since the day I met him and he will never be happy. He will not steal happiness from my baby.
I don't care if he wants to be around after she's born because he can't just pick up from there. If he wanted to be part of her life he would have started 2 months ago. No court would ever give him partial custody and I don't ever want to let him or his fucked up family near my child and poison her in any way. I am fucking out of my first trimester already. Where the fuck was Mike every time I got pains, or was sick, or couldn't eat, or sleep, or stop crying because it hurt so bad he gave up on me and my baby. I can tell you. At home playing fucking video games because that is all that fucking matters to him. Who was there holding me through everything telling me it's alright and he loves me and my little baby...Joe. Joe has been a father to my child and it isn't even his. Joe is not my babys father and never will be. My baby has no father and will be a better person for it.
I AM FUCKING BITTER TOWARDS HIM AND I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE. He blew it. She is not his baby. This child is my life and I will do anything to make her life better. Even if that means Mike won't be in it.