i feel so
I don't even know. Like I want to write, I want to dance, I want to go running. I feel as if there is too much caffeine in my system but there's only as much caffeine in my system as there is in excedrin because I had a headache and I still have a headache but it's not as bad as it was. And I want more caffeine because I want this to continue because I've thought about writing all day long cuz I haven't written in a long time and I really want to. And I love music. I love it oh so much. I've grown quite fond of the Jack Johnson. There's also an episode of Cowboy Bebop, right in the beginning of the series, that has this beautiful song called Green Bird and I can't tell if it's by Yoko Kanna or Gabriela Robin but it is so nice to listen to. And Nick Drake is always wonderful but I feel as if I have fallen out of touch with him. Perhaps we will reconnect tonight. There is also Ryan Montbleau, whose voice is quite wonderful but my awesome boyfriend does not seem to enjoy him. The best friend and I are going to a Ryan Montbleau concert tomorrow and it will be fantastic. I don't quite know when I will be able to hang with the boyfriend for I am feeling quite busy this weekend and he is going to Chicago for the holidays. That's not the point of this entry. The point of this entry is to speak of internalized things such as brain waves and thoughts and dreams. Should I make a new paragraph now?
I feel repetitive. I always speak about my writing and how difficult it is and how stuck I am in my current work. The thing is, I'm almost always stuck at the same spot as before when I talk about this. It's just so difficult to get in the mind of a villain you've created. Villains are meant to be bad but they're also meant to have a little humanity to them. How do you make them bad without making them 100% evil? 100% evil isn't believable. I want her to be believable. How do you make a villain believable?
Oh my God, I have been watching the Naruto and it has been fucking phenomenal. I know most peoples on here don't watch anime but my GOD it has been good. Throughout almost 400 or so episodes, Sasuke has been trying to get to be a great Ninja and then find his brother, who killed his entire clan leaving only Sasuke alive, so Sasuke can finally get revenge by killing him. These past few episodes, we've realized that Sasuke HAS become a great Ninja and has FINALLY found his brother and had a face-off. And Itachi... is a GREAT villain. He was so mysteriously good and evil and we never knew WHY he killed his entire clan. Maybe now we will. It's just a great story because Sasuke isn't evil, never has been, never will be, and yet he has to face-off with his brother. And if he does kill his brother, what does that mean for him? It'll create yet another scar. I mean, he watched his entire clan die and then spent the next 10 or so years of his life with just one goal in mind - find Itachi and kill him. If he finally does that, then he's left with the question What now? How do you go from kill kill kill to living a normal, peaceful life? Where does he go from there? Will Naruto finally find him and he'll somehow find peace with Konoha?
I know that's all about real stuff but it's also about writerly stuff because it has to do with story telling. Did you hear they're cancelling Dollhouse? And now the story is moving so fast, it's like fast forwarding through what would have been five seasons in a matter of six to eight episodes. You are brought face to face with the storyline, which was awesome, but so fast that you realize Joss is really pissed off at Fox and he also wants to appease his fans by at least giving them the story. God, it's so depressing. I really will stop watching Fox at the end of Dollhouse. Which is sad because my other Fox show, House, is progressing really well. Chase killed someone, Cameron left him, House got his other team back, Cutty is with another guy but is still playing that dance with House, House isn't on painkillers. It's magnificent. Sad to stop watching it. Oh well. C'est la vie.
I need chai. And then I'm going to sit and stare at my story until I write at least five pages. Then I'll check my voice mail and see what my boyfriend left me a few minutes ago.
Now I want to listen to that song again, which'll probably irritate Kurt but I don't care.
I feel repetitive. I always speak about my writing and how difficult it is and how stuck I am in my current work. The thing is, I'm almost always stuck at the same spot as before when I talk about this. It's just so difficult to get in the mind of a villain you've created. Villains are meant to be bad but they're also meant to have a little humanity to them. How do you make them bad without making them 100% evil? 100% evil isn't believable. I want her to be believable. How do you make a villain believable?
Oh my God, I have been watching the Naruto and it has been fucking phenomenal. I know most peoples on here don't watch anime but my GOD it has been good. Throughout almost 400 or so episodes, Sasuke has been trying to get to be a great Ninja and then find his brother, who killed his entire clan leaving only Sasuke alive, so Sasuke can finally get revenge by killing him. These past few episodes, we've realized that Sasuke HAS become a great Ninja and has FINALLY found his brother and had a face-off. And Itachi... is a GREAT villain. He was so mysteriously good and evil and we never knew WHY he killed his entire clan. Maybe now we will. It's just a great story because Sasuke isn't evil, never has been, never will be, and yet he has to face-off with his brother. And if he does kill his brother, what does that mean for him? It'll create yet another scar. I mean, he watched his entire clan die and then spent the next 10 or so years of his life with just one goal in mind - find Itachi and kill him. If he finally does that, then he's left with the question What now? How do you go from kill kill kill to living a normal, peaceful life? Where does he go from there? Will Naruto finally find him and he'll somehow find peace with Konoha?
I know that's all about real stuff but it's also about writerly stuff because it has to do with story telling. Did you hear they're cancelling Dollhouse? And now the story is moving so fast, it's like fast forwarding through what would have been five seasons in a matter of six to eight episodes. You are brought face to face with the storyline, which was awesome, but so fast that you realize Joss is really pissed off at Fox and he also wants to appease his fans by at least giving them the story. God, it's so depressing. I really will stop watching Fox at the end of Dollhouse. Which is sad because my other Fox show, House, is progressing really well. Chase killed someone, Cameron left him, House got his other team back, Cutty is with another guy but is still playing that dance with House, House isn't on painkillers. It's magnificent. Sad to stop watching it. Oh well. C'est la vie.
I need chai. And then I'm going to sit and stare at my story until I write at least five pages. Then I'll check my voice mail and see what my boyfriend left me a few minutes ago.
Now I want to listen to that song again, which'll probably irritate Kurt but I don't care.