(no subject)
Title: Sealed with a Letter
Author: Moppig
Fandom: NCIS
Pairing: Gibbs/DiNozzo
Rating: PG
Spoilers: SWAK and Twilight
For #9, who wanted - Gibbs/DiNozzo, NC-17 post-Twilight Gibbs and Tony finally admit what both have been hiding since Tony first started at NCIS. Sorry it didn't get too smutty.
****
Sealed with a Letter
It had taken Tony a good part of his week to find the perfect paper. He finally decided on a pack of high quality paper with matching envelopes that had just a hint of blue to them. He spent the rest of that week searching for the perfect pen. He found one with a strong almost purple blue ink that flowed smoothly enough to write neatly on the textured paper but didn't flow so much that the ink would smudge.
It took him all of his Friday evening and most of his Saturday to get the words out that he wanted to express.
It only took him a five-minute trip to the local stationers get the last thing to make letter perfect - a sticker of a pair of big red lips.
****
"You gave it to him then?"
Abby raised her eyebrows at the man standing nervously in front of her. "Hello to you too Tony. Yes I gave him it to but maybe you could let me in first."
Tony sheepishly stepped aside, letting Abby into his apartment "Sorry, I'm just a little …"
"Anxious?" Abby finished for him "Nervous? About to pee your pants?"
"Abby." Tony cut her off with a rough laugh "Yeah all of the above. Did he say anything, anything at all?'
"Tony honey, what could he say?" Abby grabbed Tony in a bear hug offering him comfort despite her teasing words earlier. "I gave him the letter like you asked but its not like he was going to read it in front of me. This is Gibbs we're talking about. He'd get all his chores done for the weekend and then read it. Duty always comes first."
"Yeah. I know, that's part of why I …"
"Love him so much? I told him the letter was safe like you asked me to." Abby omitted the part where she told Gibbs that the letter was from someone with a delicate heart and he'd better do right by him. "He'll know how important the letter is and want to read it properly. Give it the respect its due. Give him a chance, hey?"
"Yeah, Abby sorry for taking this out on you. I just hate waiting."
"Then let's not wait. Come on Tony we'll go out and paint the town red." Abby was near bouncing in her excitement. "Burn off some of your nervous energy and show the girls what they're going to be missing out on in the future."
"We hope Abby, we hope. He might say no, god he might laugh in my face." Tony held up a hand stopping Abby's almost instantaneous protest. "I know Abby this is Gibbs, he'll do things right. But there's no guarantees on how he feels about me Abbs, no guarantees at all."
"Aww Tony it'll be all right. At least you'll know for certain soon, know where you stand."
"Yeah." Tony broke from the hug and started pacing his small living room. "God I hate waiting" he repeated.
"So lets hit the clubs Tony. I know this great Goth club where …" Abby stopped at the look on Tony's face. "Ok what about the movies then. Let's go watch some stupid cop flic and laugh at all the things they get wrong."
"Abbs I'm not in the mood, sorry." Tony abruptly slumped into one of his large leather chairs.
"Aww come on Tony. What you gonna do, mooch around home, waiting for Gibbs to call?" Abby crouched down in front of the despondent man. "I know we'll go watch Kong. That'll kill a good three hours of time and THEN you can come home and pine by the phone for Gibbs like a lovelorn puppy."
"Abbs! No ok?"
"Tony! Yes ok?"
Tony closed his eyes in defeat. "Ok, ok movie and then mooching but I get to leave my phone on vibrate in case he calls and I don't have to like the movie. There is no way you can beat the original."
"That'a'boy Tony" Abby bounced up and grabbed Tony's jacket and keys for him. "And this movie's gonna rock, it has special effects to die for and I love Jack Black."
"It'll still won't beat the original Abs, NOBODY can scream the way Fay Wray could."
"Yeah but this is Peter Jackson he is the master of …" Abby was cut off by the ringing of her cell phone. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw who was calling. "Yello …. Ah yeah, yeah that's right …. No we were going out to the movies. We can not …. Yeah Ok. About three or so hours …. Yeah I'll let you know first."
"Abbs? Everything ok?" Tony was a little concerned about the sudden change in the mood of his friend.
Abby started to something but seemed to change her mind. "Nope everything's peachy Tony, just another friend with love troubles. Needs me to do a favour for him."
"You can go now if you want Abbs. You don't need to baby sit me." Tony gestured back to his apartment. "I've got a bottle Scotch that'll keep me company if need be."
"Nope, we're gonna go see Kong and you're just going to enjoy yourself whether you want to or not."
Tony shook his head at Abby's enthusiasm "Ok, ok but I'm driving."
"Nah hah Tony. You're too distracted, wouldn't want us to have an accident would you?"
"Abbs your car's creepy. " Tony protested to her retreating back "Abbs … Abby …. "
****
" .. just cause you can doesn't mean you should. A great director should know when to edit his work."
"So what? You telling me you didn't like the movie. Come on it had dinosaurs and scary natives and a really big ape and everything. What's not to like?" Abby argued as she pulled outside Tony's apartment complex.
"I didn't say that. I just thought it could have been a bit shorter and to be honest nothing going to beat the original."
"Only you Tony would prefer a black and white movie over a modern remake."
"Ah but that's the problem Abbs it’s a remake. It'll never have the same heart as the original." Tony took off his safety belt and twisted slightly in his seat. "You want to come in for a drink? I've still got that Scotch if you want."
"Nah I better not." Abby seemed unsure in her reply. "I've got some things I have to do."
"Oh yeah you're friend with the love problems. Hope you have better luck with him than you did with me."
"Tony, maybe this …"
Tony cut her off with a quick peck on the cheek. "No maybes Abbs. No platitudes ok? What will be will be. I took the risk, now its time to wait to see how it plays out."
He got out of the car before Abby could protest anymore. She seemed to want to say something else but instead blew him a small kiss and drove off.
****
Tony trudged his way up to his third floor apartment and started planly how to fill the rest of his weekend. It was only early evening so he had a good five hours to kill before he even contemplated going to bed for the night. Not that he thought he'd get much sleep that night, but at least he could try.
He was still contemplating ways to while away the time when he enter his apartment so it took him a few moments to realise that he wasn't alone.
"Gibbs …. You …. I ….."
Gibbs strode up to Tony and putting his hands on either side of Tony's face stop his spluttering with ease, by placing a kiss gently on Tony's lips. "I love you too Tony."
"You love me." Tony let go of the breath he didn't even realise he'd been holding. "You love me?"
"Yeah DiNozzo I love you.
"You read the letter then. I got Abby to give it to you so you would know it was safe. I didn't want you to think it was another bad SWAK and that was the best way I could think to do that without giving it to you myself and I'm babbling sorry."
"Its ok Tony its ok." Gibbs smiled calmly. "I read the letter straight away. I guessed from what Abby said that it was from you. I was hoping that it would contain what it did. And I was glad one of us brave enough to say what needed to be said. I'm not good with words Tony, you're probably never going to get a love letter from me. But three marriages have taught me that actions sometimes speak louder than words so sit."
He led Tony over to a nest of pillows and blanket in the middle of the living. A plate of finger food sat next to a bottle of wine chilling in an ice cooler. Flowers in all different colours where scatter around the room. Gibbs smiled at the appraising look it was getting from the younger man. "Pass inspection DiNozzo?"
Tony pursed his lips in mock thought "Finger foods easy to eat when we're lying down and its perfect to feed to each other. Good choice in the wine, light and not bubbly so we won't get too drunk. Flowers, no roses which is good, says you thought about the recipient and didn't go for the safe choice. Might have added a few candles for mood lighting but other than that it's perfect, thank you Jethro."
"Candles could be a fire risk if things got physical. I'd rather this evening didn't end with us having to call the fire department." He slipped off his shoes and nestled himself down in the pile of pillows indicating Tony do the same.
"You planning on this evening getting physical?"
"Not necessarily DiNozzo but I've learnt with you to be prepared for everything."
"Yeah, what else have you learnt about me boss." Tony snuggled into the pillows his eyes never leaving Gibbs'."
"I've learnt that as much as you play the fool to be the centre of attention you hate it when people actually pay enough attention that they may see the real you. I know that being a good cop means more to you than having the best arrest record, it's about doing the right thing and that's the real reason why you've never stayed in a job for more than two years. Until now."
"I've learnt that you like to make other people happy, like to see them smile but don't expect anyone to do the same for you. I've learnt that I want to make you happy Tony, want to make you smile. I've learnt that life really is too short and that we should grab every opportunity for happiness with both hands. I love you Anthony Donald DiNozzo. I love you with all my heart and with all my soul. "
"I thought you weren't good with words Jethro."
"I'm not Tony, I'm not. Just good with honesty."
****
Tony struggled with a pile of photo albums trying to get them into a packing box before he dropped them all. He just managed it but had to straighten a couple that fell slightly askew. As he did an envelope that had been sealed with a pair of big red lips fell out. He looked over to Gibbs, who was packing a shelf full of books.
"You kept the letter" Tony couldn't keep the surprise out of his voice.
"Of course I kept the letter" Gibbs was shocked that Tony would think otherwise "It was the first SWAK I ever received. And it got you and me together."
Tony was too distracted reading the letter in his hand to reply "God I can't believe some of the stuff I wrote in here. It sounds like something out of a Mills and Boons book."
Gibbs took the letter out of Tony hand "No it doesn't. It sounds like someone being honest and it came from the man I love. So no disrespecting it you hear. Now come on back to the packing we've got a new house to move in to."
Gibbs watched as Tony left the room with a couple of filled boxes. His eyes drifted down to the letter he was holding. He would've need his glasses if he wanted to read the neat script on the blue paper in his hands but he didn't reach for them. He had read this letter so many times over the past years that it was etched forever in his heart.
****
Jethro
I finally work up the courage to tell you all the things I've wanted to tell you for so long, all the things I've needed to tell you and here I sit with pen and paper struggling to put down one word let alone the thousands trying to get out.
Its strange but out of all the misery that has been inflicted on us in the last few weeks the saddest thing to me was when I heard that you had never received a SWAK.
Dear god Jethro. You have to be the most passionate and caring person I have ever met. I know that most people just accept the "Gibbs - the second B's for bastard" persona that you present to the world but out of all the men and women that have been in your life, surely one of them has seen past that and seen the real you. If they did, if they saw the real you and never loved you properly then damn them to hell. And if they were too lazy to see the that beautiful heart of yours then damn them all again. Be glad that they are all out of your life. None of them deserved you.
Some may say that writing a letter is the chicken's way out. Hell I didn't even give it straight to you, had to let Abby be my messenger girl instead. Well if the truth be told Jethro I am scared, scared of not saying the right thing and scared of ruining what we have between us now. I admire you Jethro and I respect you. Even if we can never be lovers I value having you in my life. You have given me a chance to excel at my career, given me direction and helped me, and yeah I know this sounds trite but it is so true, grow as a person. Jethro even if this all ends now I can look back on my time with you with happiness. You have made me proud of whom I am and it's been a long time since I've felt that way.
So maybe writing a letter is the easy way of finally telling you how much I feel but I'm hoping that will allows us both the dignity and time to not ruin a good working partnership if you realise you don't feel the same way about me. I don't expect you to lie to me Jethro, I know that's not who you are, just be kind with your honesty.
And that what's this letter all about Jethro, being honest. If losing Kate and almost dying myself is not a wake up call then I don't know what is. So even though I'm scared of losing what we have I'm even more scared of never taking the chance to say how I really feel.
I love you Leroy Jethro Gibbs. I love you with all my heart and all my soul.
Tony