adocd (attention deficit, obsessive compulsive disorder)
my life seriously sucks ass. first, this morning i forgot to take my pills. not too smart. whenever i dont take my aderol (AKA speed) and my zoloft........i turn a little different. i get really tired and dumb and i cannot pay any attention. so im in 3rd period science being lectured by the turtle man (mr. lowe) and i just happened to fall asleep. so im sleeping right, having dreams about dying and coming back to life as mr. lemmon's boxers (good dream right there) when all of the sudden, i fell off the desk and everyone laughed at me. so then to make things worse, i got to go to math class and get a 3 out of ten on my test. but that is okay because i am friends with snoop dogg and he and i will jump all the people thta got higher grades than me (the entire class). oh and just a side note- i think i have found my place in life- i am going to try ut for the next snoop dogg video. me and snoop are friends, u see, and we go trick or treating together. anyways, back to my shitty ass life, i had an orthodontist appointment. now remember when i told u that i was getting those braces off soon? and how i had that whole plan to come back to school after winter break with my hair highlighted and relaxed and my braces off? well i can just forget about that now because the little pink man with no eyebrows also known as my orthodontist made me make a choice: i could either get my braces off during winter break and have my teeth be not perfectly straight, with a chance of grindage or wear the barces for 3 more months to get rid of the grindage. i was going with the first option until he mentioned the word profile. "it might change your profile," he said. "for the better?" i asked. he shook his head. i will now have braces for 3 more months........
sounds bad now? it gets worse. then he told me that they had to make some adjustments. adjustments? i dont think these would be called adjustments. i have been thru orthodontal hell from the time i was in second grade but nothing (not even the spreader) is worse than this. i have to have 3 rubber bands going from left to right in my mouth, one of which just happens to go right across my front teeth. i look like a fucking baffoon. i cant yawn (so ill have a hard time in science), i cant stick out my tongue (unless it goes to one side. so now ill look dumb when i try to hit on people my doing sexy things with my tongue. rebecca likes that. right becca?), i cant make out (thats not a problem. im sure my calculator will understand) , i can never be taken seriously when i speak, and the worst problem (that of which i have always been able to avoid from the time i was in second grade) is that i cant suck my thumb! i love sucking my thumb! i have to suck my thumb! i must find a way. there is no way i will ever make it thru the next week if i cant suck my thumb. i will kill myself. i will tell u tomorro if i figure out a way to do it. so yea, thats the story. and by the way, i started crying like a bitch when he told me to make the choice and the little kids in the next chair were starring at me. little fuckers dont know what its like to be hungry, horny, have a big nose and adocd and braces all at the same time. speaking of the orthodontist, lat time i was there this lady was replacing the wire in my mouth and the rubber gloves she wore seriously smelled like butthole and i couldnt stop imagining what the hell she was doing prior to coming into the room. where had those goves been? i dont wanna know.
random things lately:
i would like to have a threesome with mr. lemmon and beyonce.
i had a dream the other day that i had this boyfriend who knew how to breathe underwater and he was really hot. i was too. and then he took me underwater and for some reason i got mad and i was like, "where is the top?" and then he got mad and felt like i was being ungrateful for this cool underwater romantic moment and he was like "there is no top" in a really mean voice. then i was like "hmpf" and i swam to the top (well actually i doggy paddled to the top cuz im a bad swimmer) and then he came after me and he said, "you know what? there are 12 reason why i dont wanna be with u right now" and then he started naming them. then i got mad and i said "you know what you just said? you just said 12 reasons why u dont wanna be with me right now" (i have no idea why i was repeating his sentences and why this sounded like a cool comeback, but it just did) . then he was like "im sorry. i love you." then he followed me to gymnastics wearing a cape and a leotard and i thought he was sexy. great dream.
i watched the hunchback of notre dame the other day and i felt so bad for quasimodo during that scene where esmerelda was making out with phebus (fucking fine ass animation right there) and quasimodo was watching and crying in the background. if i were her i would have said "hey quasi theres enuf room in the bed for u. well do a three way. phebus gets the front and u get the back so i dont have to look at you"
quotes from my brothers:
daniel (to rosa as she picks up his cell phone): Rosa, you no usay thisay for your friend.
jonathan: today i was doing the washington post (a millikan boy- girl dance) and this big fat girl bashed me into the mirror and i fell and then the girl i was dancing with kept going.
daniel: one day i took a shit in jonathan's room and i said it was the dog and he believed it.
jonanthan: i once put pubes in austen's familys' turkey.
me: hey jj, do u know my friend virginia cuz she goes to your school.
jonathan: no, but she probably knows me because im the most popular guy there.
daniel: jj, u have a canquer sore and a fat lip.
me: jj , who would u go gay for?
jonathan: (the fastest answer he has ever given): Randy Orton. (he is a wwe wrestler)
heres the best one:
jonathan: hey katie. u wanna know my deepest, darkest secret?
me: what?
jonathan: sometimes, when im alone in my room, i pretend im black.
he also told me that he pretends hes a girl.
and thats all for now folks......
sounds bad now? it gets worse. then he told me that they had to make some adjustments. adjustments? i dont think these would be called adjustments. i have been thru orthodontal hell from the time i was in second grade but nothing (not even the spreader) is worse than this. i have to have 3 rubber bands going from left to right in my mouth, one of which just happens to go right across my front teeth. i look like a fucking baffoon. i cant yawn (so ill have a hard time in science), i cant stick out my tongue (unless it goes to one side. so now ill look dumb when i try to hit on people my doing sexy things with my tongue. rebecca likes that. right becca?), i cant make out (thats not a problem. im sure my calculator will understand) , i can never be taken seriously when i speak, and the worst problem (that of which i have always been able to avoid from the time i was in second grade) is that i cant suck my thumb! i love sucking my thumb! i have to suck my thumb! i must find a way. there is no way i will ever make it thru the next week if i cant suck my thumb. i will kill myself. i will tell u tomorro if i figure out a way to do it. so yea, thats the story. and by the way, i started crying like a bitch when he told me to make the choice and the little kids in the next chair were starring at me. little fuckers dont know what its like to be hungry, horny, have a big nose and adocd and braces all at the same time. speaking of the orthodontist, lat time i was there this lady was replacing the wire in my mouth and the rubber gloves she wore seriously smelled like butthole and i couldnt stop imagining what the hell she was doing prior to coming into the room. where had those goves been? i dont wanna know.
random things lately:
i would like to have a threesome with mr. lemmon and beyonce.
i had a dream the other day that i had this boyfriend who knew how to breathe underwater and he was really hot. i was too. and then he took me underwater and for some reason i got mad and i was like, "where is the top?" and then he got mad and felt like i was being ungrateful for this cool underwater romantic moment and he was like "there is no top" in a really mean voice. then i was like "hmpf" and i swam to the top (well actually i doggy paddled to the top cuz im a bad swimmer) and then he came after me and he said, "you know what? there are 12 reason why i dont wanna be with u right now" and then he started naming them. then i got mad and i said "you know what you just said? you just said 12 reasons why u dont wanna be with me right now" (i have no idea why i was repeating his sentences and why this sounded like a cool comeback, but it just did) . then he was like "im sorry. i love you." then he followed me to gymnastics wearing a cape and a leotard and i thought he was sexy. great dream.
i watched the hunchback of notre dame the other day and i felt so bad for quasimodo during that scene where esmerelda was making out with phebus (fucking fine ass animation right there) and quasimodo was watching and crying in the background. if i were her i would have said "hey quasi theres enuf room in the bed for u. well do a three way. phebus gets the front and u get the back so i dont have to look at you"
quotes from my brothers:
daniel (to rosa as she picks up his cell phone): Rosa, you no usay thisay for your friend.
jonathan: today i was doing the washington post (a millikan boy- girl dance) and this big fat girl bashed me into the mirror and i fell and then the girl i was dancing with kept going.
daniel: one day i took a shit in jonathan's room and i said it was the dog and he believed it.
jonanthan: i once put pubes in austen's familys' turkey.
me: hey jj, do u know my friend virginia cuz she goes to your school.
jonathan: no, but she probably knows me because im the most popular guy there.
daniel: jj, u have a canquer sore and a fat lip.
me: jj , who would u go gay for?
jonathan: (the fastest answer he has ever given): Randy Orton. (he is a wwe wrestler)
heres the best one:
jonathan: hey katie. u wanna know my deepest, darkest secret?
me: what?
jonathan: sometimes, when im alone in my room, i pretend im black.
he also told me that he pretends hes a girl.
and thats all for now folks......