i dunno what i want sometimes.
But first. i wanna post Tom Cruise's face again:
Person: Can you go on Friday (in Filipino)?
Me: No, Sorry.
"Sorry."
Hahahahahahahahahahaha.
i'm sorry. Or not. i dunno if these people are genuinely friendly or just looking for an excuse to get drunk, sing themselves hoarse at a videoke and spend a prodigal amount of money on food. Yeah i used a thesaurus for that. i don't really believe in any of the "bonding" things they do whether it's sponsored by our boss or on their own time. Maybe i'm being a bitch but we really waste so much money on these things, when the outings are company sponsored. i really mean ridiculous amounts of money. It's... annoying. Also, given the attitudes of some of them... Hrm whatever.
Got home from a project in a far-off place. i'm losing hope with my career. Almost all our clients have shit organizational skills. i wanna take things in my own hands but i did that once and got martyred for it. Martyred meaning i ended up doing all the work. There's a thin line between being proactive and turning into the person that is expected to do all the work. i don't wanna toe that line anymore, i'm burned out, and i've got much better things to do with my life.
Anyway, even tho the client i was working for the past few days practically wasted all my time, at least they aren't assholes. Not like my (sarcastic) favorite company. i swear Philip Morris, style nyo bulok. Those people issue the purchase order and the go signal to work so late, and yet they have the gall to insist that the deadlines be made earlier. Why? Probably so the project managers on their end can get credit for it and claim their goddamn bonuses. Tang ina nila.
The clusterfuck my other officemates are in isn't entirely Philip Morris's fault. The most senior guy on that team actually agreed to such unreasonable demands. See, this is why i'm afraid of being overly-proactive in doing my job now. Coz one day you'll end up like that guy - a fucking doormat. Furthermore, by martyring yourselves, you set the standard for your company and for the other contractors in the industry - it's ok if the deadlines are unreasonable. We will force ourselves to work 16 to 18 hour shifts for a month with no weekends, sacrificing time for ourselves and our families, just so your project managers can get their bonuses. Do these economic benefits pass down on to the people that ACTUALLY DID THE WORK AND MADE THE SACRIFICE? No. Fuck these kinds of people. Both the clients and the contractors. There are no tyrants where there's nobody to be oppressed. Fucking doormats.
Fak going back to topic. So i drove all the way North for eight hours to find out that... We had no electrical and instrumentation support, several of the sensors weren't working and all the input circuitry was put in at the wrong addresses. You know, i expected this stuff to be fixed when i got there. Anyway yeah next time i'll coordinate MYSELF directly with the personnel involved in the project. Managers know nothing (except my boss and the guys at Unilever - they're cool that way). Ask for email statuses of the projects, even tho it's not my place to do so. i might be stepping out of line but fuck if i'm wasting that much time again. i'll just have to try hard to not be a doormat. i'll never ever end up like our senior engineer, who is not even a doormat anymore, but a basahan (rag used to wipe dirty wet stuff on the floor). However there were times i'd end up martyred coz other people couldn't do their jobs properly. So... Yeah. Balance.
i'm frustrated. i wanna stay in automation but the circumstances around the job don't let me live my life. Almost all the people i've had to deal with are also incredibly tiring to put up with. i dunno what i want.
On the upside, i'm really thankful my sleep schedule's been somewhat fixed. i've been waking up from 430 to 6 the past week or so, and it's helping me fall asleep properly at night. i'm trying to get this to be a regular thing coz i really feel productive when i get up that early in the morning. i can get so much done between 530 and 730am - minor gunsmithing, cardio or strength exercises, work preparations and much more. Plus, when i get that much done early in the day, it sorta sets the pace for the rest of my waking hours. So i think i'll try this new sleep schedule out.
Person: Can you go on Friday (in Filipino)?
Me: No, Sorry.
"Sorry."
Hahahahahahahahahahaha.
i'm sorry. Or not. i dunno if these people are genuinely friendly or just looking for an excuse to get drunk, sing themselves hoarse at a videoke and spend a prodigal amount of money on food. Yeah i used a thesaurus for that. i don't really believe in any of the "bonding" things they do whether it's sponsored by our boss or on their own time. Maybe i'm being a bitch but we really waste so much money on these things, when the outings are company sponsored. i really mean ridiculous amounts of money. It's... annoying. Also, given the attitudes of some of them... Hrm whatever.
Got home from a project in a far-off place. i'm losing hope with my career. Almost all our clients have shit organizational skills. i wanna take things in my own hands but i did that once and got martyred for it. Martyred meaning i ended up doing all the work. There's a thin line between being proactive and turning into the person that is expected to do all the work. i don't wanna toe that line anymore, i'm burned out, and i've got much better things to do with my life.
Anyway, even tho the client i was working for the past few days practically wasted all my time, at least they aren't assholes. Not like my (sarcastic) favorite company. i swear Philip Morris, style nyo bulok. Those people issue the purchase order and the go signal to work so late, and yet they have the gall to insist that the deadlines be made earlier. Why? Probably so the project managers on their end can get credit for it and claim their goddamn bonuses. Tang ina nila.
The clusterfuck my other officemates are in isn't entirely Philip Morris's fault. The most senior guy on that team actually agreed to such unreasonable demands. See, this is why i'm afraid of being overly-proactive in doing my job now. Coz one day you'll end up like that guy - a fucking doormat. Furthermore, by martyring yourselves, you set the standard for your company and for the other contractors in the industry - it's ok if the deadlines are unreasonable. We will force ourselves to work 16 to 18 hour shifts for a month with no weekends, sacrificing time for ourselves and our families, just so your project managers can get their bonuses. Do these economic benefits pass down on to the people that ACTUALLY DID THE WORK AND MADE THE SACRIFICE? No. Fuck these kinds of people. Both the clients and the contractors. There are no tyrants where there's nobody to be oppressed. Fucking doormats.
Fak going back to topic. So i drove all the way North for eight hours to find out that... We had no electrical and instrumentation support, several of the sensors weren't working and all the input circuitry was put in at the wrong addresses. You know, i expected this stuff to be fixed when i got there. Anyway yeah next time i'll coordinate MYSELF directly with the personnel involved in the project. Managers know nothing (except my boss and the guys at Unilever - they're cool that way). Ask for email statuses of the projects, even tho it's not my place to do so. i might be stepping out of line but fuck if i'm wasting that much time again. i'll just have to try hard to not be a doormat. i'll never ever end up like our senior engineer, who is not even a doormat anymore, but a basahan (rag used to wipe dirty wet stuff on the floor). However there were times i'd end up martyred coz other people couldn't do their jobs properly. So... Yeah. Balance.
i'm frustrated. i wanna stay in automation but the circumstances around the job don't let me live my life. Almost all the people i've had to deal with are also incredibly tiring to put up with. i dunno what i want.
On the upside, i'm really thankful my sleep schedule's been somewhat fixed. i've been waking up from 430 to 6 the past week or so, and it's helping me fall asleep properly at night. i'm trying to get this to be a regular thing coz i really feel productive when i get up that early in the morning. i can get so much done between 530 and 730am - minor gunsmithing, cardio or strength exercises, work preparations and much more. Plus, when i get that much done early in the day, it sorta sets the pace for the rest of my waking hours. So i think i'll try this new sleep schedule out.