(no subject)
in reality, its consistancy that matters
chem test on friday. scared. um. shitless.
but of course i havent studided. sometimes i worry about myself, and m lack of motivation, why am is istting here at 2 in the morning, when i know i wont write my lab report, and that i am not going to study? i am just tiring myself out!
but i like to think
after all its what makes us human.
i worry about this. i have to stop,. but i cant let it get to the same point last year. or maybe i should.
my mother is going to kill me when she sees how much wieght i have gained. thats scary too. cuse i know i have gained weight, but i kinda like it. she will not. sigh. so much for food.
which for the reacord, food is a tool. why? beacuse you can never really have what you want, when you want it however many times you want it without doing some osort of damage to your self.
ARGH. its like the worlds biggest oximoron.
my fixation upon my weight may be one of the things i hate the msot about me. no no. it IS the thing i hate the most. that and my inablility to adapt to change. and my addictive personality.
jordan is living in a bad envoirment and i msut get her out. thats my goal for the week. study. save j. maybe eat a sandwhich.
god.
i need sleep.
chem test on friday. scared. um. shitless.
but of course i havent studided. sometimes i worry about myself, and m lack of motivation, why am is istting here at 2 in the morning, when i know i wont write my lab report, and that i am not going to study? i am just tiring myself out!
but i like to think
after all its what makes us human.
i worry about this. i have to stop,. but i cant let it get to the same point last year. or maybe i should.
my mother is going to kill me when she sees how much wieght i have gained. thats scary too. cuse i know i have gained weight, but i kinda like it. she will not. sigh. so much for food.
which for the reacord, food is a tool. why? beacuse you can never really have what you want, when you want it however many times you want it without doing some osort of damage to your self.
ARGH. its like the worlds biggest oximoron.
my fixation upon my weight may be one of the things i hate the msot about me. no no. it IS the thing i hate the most. that and my inablility to adapt to change. and my addictive personality.
jordan is living in a bad envoirment and i msut get her out. thats my goal for the week. study. save j. maybe eat a sandwhich.
god.
i need sleep.