(no subject)
Very belated thoughts on Vagrant Story (see: am actually on the second playthrough now) in no particular order:
--calling a starter weapon 'Fandango' probably was with the intention that the player have Bohemian Rhapsody stuck in their head for the first quarter of the game.... but it probably wasn't supposed to be the Weird Al version.
--"Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead!" <--doesn't stop being funny.
--HEY EVERYBODY DO WE HATE ROSENCRANTZ? OH BOY WE ALL HATE ROSENCRANTZ. ALSO HE SMELLS. (thank you Sydney) WHO KEEPS INVITING HIM TO ALL THE PARTIES? OH WAIT. WE ALL DO. (i kinda loved rosencrantz.)
--two. hour. final. boss. battle.
--and 'flight of the bumblebee' would have been very appropriate music for it, I think. That thing looked like a giant hornet. Buzz motherfucker BUZZ.
--and I still think this game would make for the best Labyrinth spoof ever. (I mean, seriously. Just take the whole Magic Dance sequence and put in Sydney and Hardin. It's fun for the whole family.)
--
While traveling through a wood one evening, close to dark, Ashley Riot happened to take a step off the path.
And watched as it vanished completely, replaced by nothing but more trees and bramble.
“…and that would do it,” he said.
The locals had mentioned the place was considered obscenely haunted. Mentioned to each other anyway-- they were vastly distrustful of strangers-but if a passing vagrant happened to overhear? What was it to them? Ashley nudged a bed of thorns with a boot. It had begun to quietly wind itself up his leg while he’d been examining the new stretch of forest behind him.
“Too early for supper.” He ground it underfoot a few times to emphasize his point. “I’d like a word.”
The birds stopped singing. The wind stopped whispering through the leaves. One could even gather that somewhere a stream had stopped rambling.
Ashley sighed, drew his sword, and stabbed it into the nearest tree trunk.
The whole forest gave a startled shout. Twigs cracked without any feet upon them. Branches creaked with no gusts running through them. Pebbles kicked themselves. Birds burst out of bushes. Caves made ungodly groans no no go away go away go awa…
A gold substance dribbled out from the injured wood. Oil, it looked like, thick and dripping. Ashley had half expected blood.
The place had seemed ready enough for drama.
“I’d like a Word,” repeated the vagrant.
The squirrels took on a proper, cordial chittering. The thorns sunk back into the moss.
The corner of Ashley’s mouth turned up. “More like it,” he said, pulled his sword out of the wiring and clockwork, watched the bark heal itself, and sat down to have a pleasant word about why the Damascus Wood had been eating travelers for the last century or so…
--calling a starter weapon 'Fandango' probably was with the intention that the player have Bohemian Rhapsody stuck in their head for the first quarter of the game.... but it probably wasn't supposed to be the Weird Al version.
--"Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead!" <--doesn't stop being funny.
--HEY EVERYBODY DO WE HATE ROSENCRANTZ? OH BOY WE ALL HATE ROSENCRANTZ. ALSO HE SMELLS. (thank you Sydney) WHO KEEPS INVITING HIM TO ALL THE PARTIES? OH WAIT. WE ALL DO. (i kinda loved rosencrantz.)
--two. hour. final. boss. battle.
--and 'flight of the bumblebee' would have been very appropriate music for it, I think. That thing looked like a giant hornet. Buzz motherfucker BUZZ.
--and I still think this game would make for the best Labyrinth spoof ever. (I mean, seriously. Just take the whole Magic Dance sequence and put in Sydney and Hardin. It's fun for the whole family.)
--
While traveling through a wood one evening, close to dark, Ashley Riot happened to take a step off the path.
And watched as it vanished completely, replaced by nothing but more trees and bramble.
“…and that would do it,” he said.
The locals had mentioned the place was considered obscenely haunted. Mentioned to each other anyway-- they were vastly distrustful of strangers-but if a passing vagrant happened to overhear? What was it to them? Ashley nudged a bed of thorns with a boot. It had begun to quietly wind itself up his leg while he’d been examining the new stretch of forest behind him.
“Too early for supper.” He ground it underfoot a few times to emphasize his point. “I’d like a word.”
The birds stopped singing. The wind stopped whispering through the leaves. One could even gather that somewhere a stream had stopped rambling.
Ashley sighed, drew his sword, and stabbed it into the nearest tree trunk.
The whole forest gave a startled shout. Twigs cracked without any feet upon them. Branches creaked with no gusts running through them. Pebbles kicked themselves. Birds burst out of bushes. Caves made ungodly groans no no go away go away go awa…
A gold substance dribbled out from the injured wood. Oil, it looked like, thick and dripping. Ashley had half expected blood.
The place had seemed ready enough for drama.
“I’d like a Word,” repeated the vagrant.
The squirrels took on a proper, cordial chittering. The thorns sunk back into the moss.
The corner of Ashley’s mouth turned up. “More like it,” he said, pulled his sword out of the wiring and clockwork, watched the bark heal itself, and sat down to have a pleasant word about why the Damascus Wood had been eating travelers for the last century or so…