senior?!???!@!1
so its official. i have completed my junior year of college. I cannot believe how fast this year went by. I feel like i spent way too much time in the color darkroom. haha but still.. it was a great feeling to have put together a cohesive and really good portfolio by the end of the year. I had a bit of an uninspired dry spell and just didn't want to take pictures for about a month to a month and a half. so that was horrible. but i think that by the time i realized i wanted to take pictures of my grandma, it turned into something i really wanted to do. I also feel like I had to do it. It was good to spend time with my meme and Im sure she loved the company and the fact that I came over once a week for a good solid 4 months. i am really excited to get a job and make enough money to buy myself the hasselblad i want. I just hope that I can land a job really soon. I did bar-tending school and passed with flying colors i just hope that someone will hire me with practically no experience. =\
I also cant believe that next year I will graduate college. It feels like only last year I was graduating high school. Time is flying by way too fast and I kinda really want it to slow down a bit. I want more time to savor my freedom just a bit longer. I want more time to be able to put a handle on my life and actually figure out if teaching is what I want to do. Or live in the city and just BE an artist and get a photography job. I guess I have all next year to think about it. I also have all next year to figure out where chris and i will end up. I know he is dead set on getting ready and passing the Fire Department test (in 2011 =P) but Im just not sure how I feel about that yet. We watch that show Rescue Me with Dennis Leary and when I watch.. i see something completely different than he does. He sees a completely awesome job where he can sit around all day with the other firefighters until they get called and go fight fires.. and then when i watch I see that they really are going into burning buildings, saving people and how completely dangerous it is. It really scares me and Im a little afraid to tell him that because he wants it so much and all I want is for him to be happy. He hates his job now and i hear him complain about it constantly and that makes me unhappy too because there's nothing I can do to fix it. And his job is just the first thing that i have to think about. My parents still want to me to "keep an open mind" about looking for someone else just because Chris isn't jewish. I hate that. No one knows how much I really hate it. It drives me completely insane and feel like just going up to them and literally punching them in the face. They don't know how it is between us and how completely crazy about each other we are. And to be completely honest.. I could totally see myself marrying him. Right now at least. I have no idea how ill feel if he does actually pass the FD test. But those are not things to think about now. I mean we don't talk about the future at all.. which is a good thing and a bad thing at the same time. But right now I think its good. We live week to week and its good and keeps things new and fresh and we have so much fun together. I really do truly and completely love him.
So enough of thaaaatttt! lol Next year is going to completely kick ass because Im gonna be in the city and that is all that matters. I will be able to stay out late with friends. I wont have to leave the second class ends just to be home at a decent hour so that I can wake up at the crack of dawn just to get to class on time. I don't think anyone knows how much easier this will be on me. I will be able to just go and take pictures and I will work and make a ton of money and I will move out of the dorms and find an apartment and just START my life. Its exhilarating and a scary at the same time. I just cant wait. Just the waiting is driving me crazy and i've only just finished school 4 days ago. hahah
okay well my nose is going to fall off my face because of my allergies now.. so i better to find a way to keep it there. lol
see ya! =)
I also cant believe that next year I will graduate college. It feels like only last year I was graduating high school. Time is flying by way too fast and I kinda really want it to slow down a bit. I want more time to savor my freedom just a bit longer. I want more time to be able to put a handle on my life and actually figure out if teaching is what I want to do. Or live in the city and just BE an artist and get a photography job. I guess I have all next year to think about it. I also have all next year to figure out where chris and i will end up. I know he is dead set on getting ready and passing the Fire Department test (in 2011 =P) but Im just not sure how I feel about that yet. We watch that show Rescue Me with Dennis Leary and when I watch.. i see something completely different than he does. He sees a completely awesome job where he can sit around all day with the other firefighters until they get called and go fight fires.. and then when i watch I see that they really are going into burning buildings, saving people and how completely dangerous it is. It really scares me and Im a little afraid to tell him that because he wants it so much and all I want is for him to be happy. He hates his job now and i hear him complain about it constantly and that makes me unhappy too because there's nothing I can do to fix it. And his job is just the first thing that i have to think about. My parents still want to me to "keep an open mind" about looking for someone else just because Chris isn't jewish. I hate that. No one knows how much I really hate it. It drives me completely insane and feel like just going up to them and literally punching them in the face. They don't know how it is between us and how completely crazy about each other we are. And to be completely honest.. I could totally see myself marrying him. Right now at least. I have no idea how ill feel if he does actually pass the FD test. But those are not things to think about now. I mean we don't talk about the future at all.. which is a good thing and a bad thing at the same time. But right now I think its good. We live week to week and its good and keeps things new and fresh and we have so much fun together. I really do truly and completely love him.
So enough of thaaaatttt! lol Next year is going to completely kick ass because Im gonna be in the city and that is all that matters. I will be able to stay out late with friends. I wont have to leave the second class ends just to be home at a decent hour so that I can wake up at the crack of dawn just to get to class on time. I don't think anyone knows how much easier this will be on me. I will be able to just go and take pictures and I will work and make a ton of money and I will move out of the dorms and find an apartment and just START my life. Its exhilarating and a scary at the same time. I just cant wait. Just the waiting is driving me crazy and i've only just finished school 4 days ago. hahah
okay well my nose is going to fall off my face because of my allergies now.. so i better to find a way to keep it there. lol
see ya! =)