(no subject)
so I defanitly think this was the longest week of my entire life. I feel like I'm a roller coaster of emotions. It's really quite pathetic. I've been stressed out and tired and hurt and angry....yeah I think I have had it all this week not due to anyone's fault or anything. I was suppose to go out to Thai food with Glynnie after my rectial, but I couldn't get a hold of her. It's probably better that I just stay home and rest since I have to be into work tomorrow for 8am.
Darin + Charlene = not talking. I personally think it's really lame, but I'm going to sit here and a stubborn bitch because that is what I do best. I try to explain it and I try to understand it, but maybe I've been missing it the whole time. You can't make someone be with you. If they don't, they don't and that should be the end. There shouldn't be any excuses because you're the only one who has that 'gut feeling'. I think up all the excuses I want to and call his dumb. Then I sit there call and names and cry, but what does that really do for me? Nothing correct. At the end of it all, nothing changed. He told on Tuesday that he was going to prom with Megan and I was really really upset. I started crying and tried to talk about Sunday night and I still couldn't say what I wanted to. Maybe the worst part is the fact that I don't think he misses me half as much as I miss him...or if he even notices I'm gone. Obviously he notices, but ya know what I'm saying? This would all be a lot easier if I could just read minds. As hard as I try to hate him to make it easier on myself, I can't. He's been really...honest? I don't really know the word, but he's handled it really well while I've done it before and sat there and cried like a 6 year old throwing a tantrum. It makes me feel better to write this, but then I know nothing is going to change.
I'm in a really weird mood. I want to upload my prom pictures, but they're too bittersweet to handle right now.
Dance recital was the lonliest and stupidest thing I've ever done. I messed up and I have never done that. I miss this time at last year, but let's just look towards the future. You never know what it can hold.
This was pretty pointless huh?