(no subject)
Oh Lydiali, too much is wrong.
I can't take this. I know it is wrong to react like this, mentally and emotionally wrong, but I don't want to deal with it, I don't want to think about it, I don't want it to be real. and despite how much I talk about it, how many members of the family I try to get on my side, it is no good. I only feels worse and worse and worse, and I want it be go away. I always thought I probably wasn't strong enough, and now I see it's true.
nothing has yet compared to this. nothing.
On the upside: I had an awesome time with Jen this weekend, and I got a job at a local farm that makes me very happy.
I can't take this. I know it is wrong to react like this, mentally and emotionally wrong, but I don't want to deal with it, I don't want to think about it, I don't want it to be real. and despite how much I talk about it, how many members of the family I try to get on my side, it is no good. I only feels worse and worse and worse, and I want it be go away. I always thought I probably wasn't strong enough, and now I see it's true.
nothing has yet compared to this. nothing.
On the upside: I had an awesome time with Jen this weekend, and I got a job at a local farm that makes me very happy.