Fathers 7/8
Title: Fathers
Author: Magpie
Rating: pg-13
Genre: Nate/Eliot, pre-Parker/Hardison, team!ficish, very slight ofc
Verse: BlackKing WhiteKnight!Verse
Summary: "Found You." Two words bring back a nightmare buried twenty years in Eliot's past. As things fall apart the only way to put themselve back together may be to face who it was who made them who they are.
Notes:Longest chapter yet (again). This is the last main chapter. I have a short epilouge of sorts that ties off *most* of the story lines where they need tieing. Being that this universe will go on past this point (and I've already got a half dozen stories bouncing around in my head) there will still be some tie ins later but hopefully I'll get all the important stuff.
Also, you might have noticed I now have pretty icons. faketoysoldier made them for me. I'm still trying to figure out if I'm doing the crediting right but I'm doing marginally better than I normally do with coding.
Lastly if anyone's been wandering around my journal they might notice some things are a changin'. I've been doing some pretty massive coding for easier navigation and updating of tags. I've also orginized my BKWK stories into a chronological order and am systematically fixing the little now cannon errors (mostly revolving around season two not having offices). So if for example you went to reread "Stay" and discovered Eliot went to another apartment he'd commendered for gym like purposes there is nothing wrong with your screen/memory. Don't worry though. All I changed are the details.
Oh, and for anyone who remembers the Cell #8 chapter that wanted to be a trainning montage? This chapter really wanted to be one of those cool episodes where they intercut the finale with music.
As usual, this nicely polished fic is brought to you by she who should be praised: Als_wonderland.
Warnings: Vauge and not so vauge implications of past sexual abuse, angst, and symbolisim.
Chapter one, two, three, four, 5, 6
Lawrence, Kentucky
20 years ago
“…I just want you to know I would have fought for you until the end. But this is for the best. Stay safe. Love, Elie.”
Elie let out a long breath and sighed, putting the letter into the envelope and sealing it up. That was the last thing. Everything was already set. He just needed to leave the letter so Willy could find it and make sure it got to Joey. Then he’d just grab Willy’s keys, go into the garage and fade away into a memory. This town would forget him soon enough, but Joey would be safe and that was what really mattered wasn’t it?
He stood up from the stool, checking the kitchen clock. It was past midnight and the house had been quiet a long time. No one would be getting up for another four or five hours. That should be enough time. And even if they did, who checked the garage first thing in the morning?
Just leave the note on the counter.
He picked up the keys to Willy’s car.
Walked out to the house’s garage where He kept the family car. Shut the door and windows before turning on the car, to make sure no one heard it start up.
He sat in the seat for a moment, already slipping away, even though he knew that was just in his head.
He got out of the car, went into the corner of the garage near the exhaust and laid down.
He was Tired. Sleep wouldn't ease his kind of Tired, but sleep would bring Rest.
Everything was taken care of, as best he could. He could lay down now, and Rest. The pain would be over soon.
~*~
Eliot woke up with a start, coughing, pulling away from the warmth of the exhaust of the tailpipe it took a moment to recognize as Nate’s breath. He sat up, taking a few deep breaths, trying to pull himself back to the present. Pull himself away from the dream and memory.
Nate sat up, rubbing his eyes, disoriented. Eliot knew he wasn’t used to being woken by Eliot’s nightmare after Eliot was already awake. Nate was a light sleeper when he wasn’t drunk and the first sign of thrashing normally was all he needed.
A cautious hand touched Eliot’s shoulder and he tensed. He hated the fact that yesterday morning Nate would have pulled him into an embrace.
And that yesterday morning, Eliot would have been sure he wouldn’t have reacted violently to Nate doing so.
“Eliot.”
”Bad dream.” Eliot said. The hand on his shoulder lifted away immediately. He turned, a feat, since he was between Nate and the wall without much room to maneuver, and caught at Nate’s hand, shaking his head. “No.” He said simply, hoping Nate understood he hadn’t been dreaming about that. Nate met his eyes, the same unasked question lingering there. He never asked what Eliot dreamt about. He never once asked what memories had become the nightmares that haunted, and had long ago driven Eliot to sleep in short brief bursts that rarely allowed dreaming.
But Eliot knew he wondered. Knew he wanted to know. Wanted to help ease away those old wounds like he had the scars Eliot carried. Eliot hadn’t been willing to share before. Too often his mind slipped between one and another but never failed to slip back to when he first learned fear.
Eliot closed his eyes and sighed. “It was three nights before I sent Joey away. I tried to kill myself.” Nate blinked, non-comprehending. “I’d had enough.” Eliot said with a matter of fact shrug, sliding off the foot of the bed and heading out the door.
He needed air. He needed to clear his head. He had to be on his game today.
~*~
Breakfast was a strange affair that morning. The Leverage group was a rowdy bunch and with the breakfast feast Eliot and Joey had gotten together to feed the seven of them there was more than the usual mess going on. It didn’t completely mask the fact that the group's mood as a whole couldn’t seem to decide between trying to cheer up the little boy in their midst (with little success), and being somber in respect of Marie still being missing.
They were trying to act as normal as physically possible but they were all waiting for the phone to ring. They were all waiting for the next move to begin so everything could be over.
None of them liked the plan. None of them liked that the plan had Eliot going in alone. Nate was watching him as Eliot worked over the stove, calling El over to help him with the latest batch of pancakes to replenish the plate. Parker and Hardison had utterly demolished it before the others had even gotten to it.
He seemed stable enough. He’d pulled back and away from what he was going through but didn’t seem to be crossing into Black Knight territory.
But his confession about his dream had Nate worried. Okay, the entire plan had him worried. It depended on Eliot’s mental stability holding through to the end, in face of all this.
And Nate now knew that Eliot had actually taken steps to kill himself before Cairo, where he’d been suicidal for god only knew how long before Nate met him.
It was hard to reconcile the Eliot they knew now, with the Eliot then. After all, wasn’t Eliot famous because he always survived? Wasn’t it his survival instincts that made him such a fighter?
But Nate knew different. Back in the beginning, when this all had started after that wedding fiasco Eliot had clarified for him. “Not survival, self preservation. There’s a difference. Self preservation knows when your best option is to just lay down an die.”
His only comfort was the statement that Eliot had said next. “When that happens you better have a lot of good reasons to keep on fighting.” He’d said Nate had been his good reason a couple of times. Back in Cairo, when they first met, Nate had been his only reason.
Now Eliot had seven very good reasons. Nate hoped that was enough.
He and Sophie were finally getting a taste of the pancakes Hardison was accusing Eliot of lacing with crack when the telephone rang.
Eliot answered it, freezing up and answering with a voice that had just a hint of fear in it. “…Yes Daddy.”
Nate knew Eliot was playing along with a madman, at least in part, but hearing those words twisted, knowing what had been done… it fed the already blazing urge Nate had to throttle That Man.
By the set expressions of the others at the table, Nate had a feeling he was far from alone in the sentiment. If they had their way Eliot would not be doing the hitting this time around.
At least not all of it.
“…I’ll bring it Daddy. May I please speak to Marie?” Eliot closed his eyes and let out a long breath. “I am sorry. I’ll be there soon. Love you too.”
Definitely not all of it.
~*~
They were to go to the Picnic House again. Specifically, Eliot was supposed to go to the picnic house. Alone. With cash. Not that any one of them thought the cash was the important part to anyone involved.
Eliot was, seemingly, going in alone. He had his com in though, and Nate, Parker, and Sophie were making their way there separately, ready to pull in and provide backup. Hardison was staying home with Joey and El ‘just in case’.
Eliot took one last look over his shoulder, drawing in a sharp breath when he saw a small blue eyed boy looking out the upstairs window. He told himself that it was just El.
He ignored that he’d left El with Hardison as the hacker had decided to take it upon himself to keep the boy entertained by introducing him to the joys of “Wow”.
He turned back to look down the road, trying to shake off the chilling sensation, putting the truck into gear.
This world will never be what I expected
And if I don’t belong who would have guessed it?
I will not leave alone, everything I own
To make you feel like it’s not too late
It’s never too late…
Eliot went in alone, but it was only a minute or two before he addressed them over the coms. “He’s not here.” There was something shaken, off, in his voice. Nate wondered at it, but didn’t comment.
The others were already on their way out of the car and into the picnic house. Eliot was standing outside, leaning against the barn with his eyes closed, looking like he was trying to hold it together.
“Anything inside?” Nate asked and Eliot hesitated only half beat before shaking his head. Nate didn’t need the small hint of a lie, probably only present because it was so against Eliot’s instincts to lie to him. He could tell by the way Eliot was reacting that there had been some small surprise left for him inside. Even if Eliot was trying to keep control it had gotten a true reaction out of him.
But Nate, and the others, left it alone. They knew all they needed. If Eliot wanted to tell them he would but they wouldn’t go prodding further into this nightmare.
“What do we do now?” Sophie asked. “Just go back and wait again? We need to stop playing along with this.”
“We have to be careful.” Nate insisted, taking brief shelter in doing his job and playing his part. “Lawrence has a hostage. We take this too fast and she could wind up dead.”
“We take this to slow and she will be dead!” Parker argued, as usual saying what none of them actually wanted said out loud.
There was a pained, awkward silence broken by the sound of Nate’s cell phone ringing. He picked it up, seeing it was Hardison calling. “Hardison?”
Hardison's voice was soft and shallow, laced with panic. “He took her.”
Nate let the shock show on his face. “Who… Joey?”
“I don’t know how… lord, Eliot’s going to kill me, but Lawrence found a way through my system. I didn’t even know he was in the house until I heard the front door slam. I grabbed El and got out as soon as we could.”
Hardison was rambling, worried, anxiety plain in his voice and Nate could only think of a million different reasons for it. “Okay, just stay calm. Take El and go to someplace safe. There’s a train station in town not far from where you are. Stay there and wait for us to get in touch.
They hung up and Nate turned to the others. “He took Joey, Hardison got El out. They’re going somewhere safe.” He spoke bluntly, this wasn’t a situation to soften the news.
Eliot’s reaction was immediate. He took in a sharp breath, his posture, his entire demeanor changing as he’d let it out. It was a shift to something more violent, getting into the headspace he stayed in while he fought. Nate only hoped he could stay there without going further.
Another sharp breath and something inside seemed to give way. Eliot moved, brushing past Sophie, not even trying to avoid bumping into her, as he broke away from the circle and the barn all together.
He’d need space to get his mind in order, deal with that this was happening, before they could take action.
They waited a few minutes before Nate spoke, calling over the com. “Eliot?”
Silence.
“Eliot, it’s time to come back.”
Nothing.
“Eliot.”
“He’s gone.” Hardison said over the com, actual panic rising in his voice. “He took out his com. He’s gone off script.”
Sophie started fumbling with her jacket and bag. After a moment she looked up at Nate, her eyes wide. She didn’t explain, just opened her jacket so he could see where she’d attached a holster for a gun on the inside.
It was empty.
The bottom of his stomach dropped out. This was so far off book…
He dialed Eliot’s cell in a last vain effort, getting immediately sent to voice mail. “Eliot!”
Even if I say It’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll turn it around
Cause it’s not to late, it’s never to late
“Spencer! Spencer! Wake up damnit!”
Elie coughed, words penetrating through the haze, dragging him back to the lucid world. He coughed again, his lungs burning a little even as the cool night air threatened to chill him further. Soft, night damp, grass beneath him reminded him that he’d gone to sleep lying on concrete trusting he wouldn’t wake up.
“Come on son. Don’t make me take you to a hospital. I don’t wanna be the one to give Lawrence a reason to hit you.”
Willy. It was Willy’s voice. Willy had found him.
He opened his eyes, blinking until his sight cleared and he could see the worried man standing above him. “wh… how?”
“You idiot boy. I could kill you for scaring me like that. Aint you got any sense in that head of yours?” Elie just blinked up at him. He didn’t know how to respond, or explain. He’d never really thought he’d have to. The fact Willy was pissed at him, something Elie had only experienced the night he brought Ames home an hour late from their date, wasn’t helping.
He closed his eyes and looked away, slumping against the ground wishing it would just absorb him, take him. “Tired.” He whispered.
The hands that touched him a moment later were gentle, somehow bypassing his normal dislike to contact, easing him so he was sitting up. “I know son. I know” Willy whispered. “but you gotta get up and keep walking. What’s your sister gonna do if you lay down an’ die.”
Elie mumbled a protest but instinctively helped, sitting up under his own power and when those hands urged him to his feet he rose and let them stabilize him before he opened his eyes. He felt like a puppet with most of his strings cut, but he was moving. Willy was telling him to and he did what Willy said, always. After the life he’d lived, it was the only way he could really think of showing the man how much he meant to Elie.
“Walk with me.” Willy instructed. “Walk with me and tell me what this was about.” Elie nodded and they started to walk. It was slow at first as Elie got his feet under him and his equilibrium back, but apparently he hadn’t been in there long enough for any kind of serious damage.
They’d reached the stables and were walking through the darkened hallway when Willy broke the silence. “What happened?” They both knew he meant more than what Elie was up to in the garage.
“Nothing. I’m just tired.”
“Something happened. You were tired last week. You were tired last year. You’ve been tired as long as I’ve known you. But you weren’t trying to kill yourself then.” There was a long pained pause before he pressed on, making the logical guess. “Was it Joey?” Elie looked over at Willy, surprise showing on his face
“This afternoon, you were desperate to get her as far from that man as possible. Really desperate. So far, you’ve trusted yourself to keep her safe, but this afternoon you were scared.” He trailed off. “You’ve been set on just surviving and protecting her until now. What changed?”
“I have to get her out.” Elie said not looking at him. “I can’t do this anymore. I… If I die… there’ll be a body. He won’t be able to claim I ran away because I’m a restless youngster. The town’ll… my friends… they won’t just look away if I’m dead. They’ll make sure she’s alright.” He closed his eyes. “And the pain will stop.”
Willy’s hand touched his shoulder and he winced away, hating himself for it but there was too much. Willy normally knew not to touch him. Everyone knew Elie didn’t like to be touched. “What happened?” Willy prodded one more time.
”…He called her pretty last week.” Elie said, barely at a whisper. “First nice thing he’s said to her in years. Yesterday he bought her ribbons for her hair.”
“He’s drunk and playing with half a deck. Maybe he’s just being nice.”
“She’s almost thirteen.” Elie muttered, the words coming out as if he’d been declaring her terminally ill.
“What?” Willy asked, not understanding.
“She’s almost thirteen. When I was almost thirteen he started noticing me. He brought home a baseball cap. Got me a birthday present.” His voice turned bitter. “A month later he gave me another special present.”
”…Spencer…” There was horror there, just a hint of it, just the beginning of a comprehension there.
“She’s almost thirteen.” He said, turning back to meet Willy’s eyes. “I need to get her out. I get her out and it’s over. It all ends. After that I don’t care, it’s way too late for me ta care. I just want to end it before it’s to late for her too.”
Willy let out a long slow breath. Elie could see rage and grief battling across his face before he took another breath and spoke. “I’ll help you get her out.” Elie opened his mouth to argue, to say that it couldn’t work, that if Willy so much as tried the Lawrence's would bury him before it did Elie any good. Willy shook his head. “It’s a gamble but I think I have a plan, and this is something I should have done a long time ago.” Willy chewed his lip then nodded. “We can end this. I just need you to hang on a little while longer. Then it’ll be over. Can you do that?”
Elie nodded jerkily. For Willy he could hold himself together a little longer.
This world will never see this side reflected
And if there's something wrong who would have guessed it
And I have left alone everything that I own
To make you feel like it’s not too late
It’s never too late
No answer. No answer on Eliot’s cell. According to Hardison, he’d smashed it the day before.
The plan had been going smoothly. Hardison had found the wire taps and hidden cameras and everything That Man was using to monitor the Picnic House and the Phillips Household early on in their stay. Eliot had been able to predict his actions nearly to a T. Joey had already put herself in to act as bait and the others had been surprised to find Eliot needed little convincing to let her do so after they had a brief, private, chat.
Joey had been given a com and half a dozen tracking devices hidden in her clothes and on her body. Hardison had left a loophole anyone with basic coding would be able to find, relying on a basic something or other Nate hadn’t really had the processing capacity at that moment to understand.
Eliot had made it clear to the others that the best way to draw That Man out would be to make him believe Eliot was breaking under the pressure and give him a perceived bargaining chip. As a kid, That Man had broken him to the bridle and kept him there with threats to Joey. Once he felt like he’d managed to return Eliot to that headspace, he wouldn’t be afraid to face a career Hitter. Until that confrontation, Eliot would play a role, himself, slipping back and breaking down.
They knew there was a risk. That it was only a matter of time before something gave. But Eliot had insisted it was the quickest way to end this. The quickest way to get Marie home.
Now Eliot was racing toward a confrontation and Nate didn’t even know if it was the White Knight or the Black who was going in.
Or which would be the one to come out again.
Hardison’s voice over the com broke Nate’s train of thought. “I activated the tracking device.” It took Nate a moment to remember how a year or more ago he had managed to convince Eliot to let them implant a tracking device in his body as a precaution against the more painful pitfalls Hitters were doomed to experience at least a few times in their career: capture. “Get in the car. I’ll tell you how to follow him.”
They piled into the car praying they’d reach Eliot before it was too late.
Even if you say it’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll it around cause
It’s not too late, it’s never too late.
Joey hadn’t said a word since the woman came to the door and took mama into another room to tell her the bad news. Elie knew, that Joey knew what this meant, what was about to happen. She wouldn’t look at Elie. After years of spending every possible moment together when at home, they were now on opposite sides of the room and Joey was making no move to correct that.
When Elie walked over to her she stiffened, not looking up, refusing to meet his eyes. Betrayal, hurt, fear, grief. Everything he never wanted to see in his sister.
“Joey, Joey, listen to me alright?” He put his hands on her shoulders, willing her to just look at him. “I’m sorry. But this… this is just how things have to go. I… I can’t do this any more. I’m not going to make it much longer. I need to know you’re safe.” She wouldn’t meet his eyes, wouldn’t speak. “I need you to go with this woman an…and try and make a life for yourself. Take care of yourself, be good, and work hard. You can be someone, have a decent life, get away from here… far away.”
She still wouldn’t meet his eyes but when he pulled her in for one last hug, clinging tightly to her knowing he’d probably die before he saw her again, she clung back even tighter.
Later he’d remember bits and pieces. The lady coming out. His mother starting to cry. Joey taking the lady’s hand and declining the chance to hug her mother one last time. The door slamming shut behind them. Joey looking out the back window of the car, finally meeting his eyes just before she disappeared around a corner.
Standing there, feeling nothing.
The World we knew it won’t come back
Eliot walked into the old garage on the back acres of one of the Lawrence’s estates. His eyes skipped over the sight of That Man to behind him, where Joey sat, arms wrapped around a small figure even though her hands were cuffed together, the links looped around an exposed pipe.
The time we lost we can’t get back
A small blonde head turned, Marie’s scared blue eyes meeting his across the room. From the distance he couldn’t tell the difference between her and Joey at that age.
The life we had won’t be ours again
He turned his eyes back to That Man, Andrew Lawrence. Standing in the middle of a time decayed garage, the monster from his childhood had been replace by a balding middle aged man with thinning features, small eyes, and ragged clothes. He smiled, showing tobacco-yellowed teeth and Eliot felt the ghost of a sizzle and burn of a cigar being put out in his skin.
He bit down the fear, the anger, the desire to kill. He saw red but breathed through it. Standing straighter, shedding the role he’d played, he met Andrew Lawrence’s eyes. Eliot smiled and fear played across Lawrence’s face. In the back of his mind Hardison’s voice suggested some suitable movie quotes for this moment when he took revenge. It pulled him back and Eliot’s smile faded. “Joey, cover Marie’s eyes.” He said coldly, never taking his eyes off That Man.
In one motion Eliot drew the gun he’d taken off of Sophie earlier, clicked off the safety and pointed it at the man in front of him. He didn’t like guns, but he knew how to use them. He took a breath, steadied himself, aimed, and fired.
This world will never be what I expected.
Spencer had been standing off to the side, uncomfortable in his tux and bored with having to keep an eye on his little sis who was much too excited to be a flower girl and far too young to be forced to stand still for this long. He’d been thinking about how much he was looking forward to cake and ice cream Mama had promised him when her Boyfriend, his stepfather he amended himself, since the vows were now over and there had been a suitably icky sight of seeing his mama kiss someone, called him and Joey over.
They walked together onto the stage to meet their mother and new dad. The man knelt down to be eye level with the two kids, smiling brightly at them. “Hey there you two.” He said softly. “I’m your father now. I promise to take good care of you.” He smiled at Spencer and Spencer smiled back, relieved. Mom’s boyfriend had never liked him or Joey. He’d yelled and sometimes he grabbed Spencer a little too hard. But he was promising to take care of them and people always did what they promised. Things would be better now, for everyone.
“Okay daddy.” Eliot said, smiling brightly. The assembled guests cheered, but the man’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.
And if I don’t belong…
The bullet hit it’s target and Andrew Lawrence fell to the floor.
Dead.
Even if you say it’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll turn it around cause it’s not to late
It’s never to late
They’d arrived at the scene in time to hear a single gunshot. They moved quickly, surging out of the car.
They didn’t make it to the door before Joey emerged with Maria. Both were crying but at the horrified looks on their faces Joey shook her head and looked down, trying to sooth Maria. “Eliot’s alive. That Man is dead.”
She stepped to the side and Nate went forward, hearing Sophie hold the others back.
He entered the dark garage and saw Eliot crouched beside That Man’s corpse, his face obscured by his hair and posture betraying nothing. A pistol that had been emptied of it’s remaining rounds sat nearby.
Nate moved cautiously toward Eliot, trying to determine what state of mind the Hitter was in, and if it was safe to try to comfort him.
Eliot broke the silence, his voice calm, soft, and cold. “He had to die to end the threat. If I didn’t one of you would have.” Nate let out a long breath. He hadn’t consciously thought about it, what they were planning on doing with Lawrence once they took him down. They all wanted revenge for what he’d done, but he had nothing to take but his life, and Nate had to admit maybe, when it was one of their own, they weren’t above taking that.
Eliot turned to look up at Nate, face unreadable. “I hurt people. I’ve killed. A little more won’t make a difference, but I won’t let that man hurt any of my family, even if it’s just by being their first kill.” He looked back down. “I don’t like guns. They make it not personal. It’s easy ta kill without feeling a thing. I thought… but…”
Nate closed his eyes, swallowing the bile in his throat and biting down the horror at what Eliot had barely avoided. Eliot’s violence was born from the abuse dealt by that man. It was something Eliot struggled to control, to keep the monster controlled. He’d known taking revenge on Eliot's abuser might make him lose it, make him let go, let the Black Knight take hold.
He’d killed that man with a gun to make it about protecting the team. Not about revenge.
“It felt good.” Eliot confessed. “First kill in years that’s felt good.”
“He tortured you for seven years.” Nate said softly, resting a hand on Eliot’s shoulder, giving him an anchor. “I’d be more worried if you didn’t feel anything.”
“It’s over now. He can’t hurt us. You can’t hurt him. We’re still alive. It’s over.”
Maybe we’ll turn it all around cause it’s not too late
It’s never too late
There was clean up and wrap up to do, but mostly they had to leave. They wiped down the few things that had been touched and disappeared, leaving only the gun behind. It was a hitter’s weapon, and police would have to trace it through five hostile countries to even pin it to an alias.
No one spoke more than necessary. No one was even sure what there could possibly be left to say.
It was when they were driving back up the driveway to the Phillips house and had turned the corner that Marie spoke for the first time since she’d been rescued. “Dad’s car! He’s home!” She pointed toward the blue car parked in front of the house.
Sophie smiled, as after Hardison had rewired the tapped lines at the house the night before, Josephine had called her husband. Hardison had met him at the train station earlier to make sure he stayed out of harms way until the all clear was given.
A few moments later El came bounding out the front door followed quickly by his father with Hardison exiting last.
The car had barely stopped when Marie was opening her door and scrambling out of her seat belt and onto the ground, running to her father and big brother. Joey followed with only a little more caution, the family completely reunited by the time everyone else had climbed out of the car.
Hardison joined the team in watching the Phillips take stock of each other and reassure themselves and each other (both children and parents) that they were going to be okay.
Marie must have said something then, because her father picked her up to sit on his shoulders, settling her before holding out one hand for El to hold and wrapping the other around Joey. They walked back toward the house.
Before they disappeared El glanced up to his sister then back to the team, meeting Eliot’s eyes and then followed his family inside.
In that moment, Sophie saw a young boy’s ghost finally laid to rest. It was too late for Eliot, too late to save him the way that really mattered, too late to give him even the half a chance they’d all had.
But it wasn’t too late for El, and in El, Sophie saw what they all saw. Eliot as he might have been, as he should have been, like some cosmic reset button had been pressed after the mistakes were undone.
Eliot sighed and started walking toward the house. Parker moved to catch up to him with Hardison not far behind.
Nate came to stand beside Sophie and they watched together as the other three made their way. There was a trace of something there between them, the old companionship that had come before. Before Sam’s death, before the team split up, before yesterday. A companionship that had been the undertone of a romance that hadn’t happened, a tie that tied the two of them together like it tied all five of them together.
Understanding.
Normal, well adjusted people did not become thieves and they did not become the best at what they did. Those on the team were all who they’d been made to be a long time ago. Part of the reason they could come together like this, why they could work together when they’d spent their whole lives alone, was they all knew that they were who they’d been made to be and it was far too late to change that.
It was too late to make Parker a normal, completely sane woman. Something had just gone wrong.
It was too late for Hardison to go back onto the grid and live a normal life when everything he’s capable of, what defines who he is, is illegal at best.
It was too late for Sophie to learn to tell the truth and stop playing her part and learn to live in a world other than the one she was born into.
It was too late for Nate to go back to seeing the world in black and white instead of shades of gray.
It was too late to save Elie, and too late to fix Eliot.
Laughter and sounds of a scuffle broke through her bleak reverie. Up ahead Hardison and Eliot had gotten into a scuffle and were rough housing while Parker cheered them on, calling out something Sophie wasn’t sure even made sense to the other two involved.
Clearly it didn’t, because the scuffle stopped while the Hardison and Eliot turned to look at Parker with equally perplexed expressions. Parker’s next comment was too soft for Sophie to hear but caused Hardison to back peddle with a shout of “Hell NO”.
And Eliot? He laughed. His face lighting up the way it did sometimes, and Sophie felt a small smile cross her face.
Nate patted her shoulder and went forward to act as referee before the kids got into any more mischief, leaving her with four words and a hint she hadn’t been alone in her train of thought. “It’s not too late.”
It’s not too late, it’s never too late
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Author: Magpie
Rating: pg-13
Genre: Nate/Eliot, pre-Parker/Hardison, team!ficish, very slight ofc
Verse: BlackKing WhiteKnight!Verse
Summary: "Found You." Two words bring back a nightmare buried twenty years in Eliot's past. As things fall apart the only way to put themselve back together may be to face who it was who made them who they are.
Notes:Longest chapter yet (again). This is the last main chapter. I have a short epilouge of sorts that ties off *most* of the story lines where they need tieing. Being that this universe will go on past this point (and I've already got a half dozen stories bouncing around in my head) there will still be some tie ins later but hopefully I'll get all the important stuff.
Also, you might have noticed I now have pretty icons. faketoysoldier made them for me. I'm still trying to figure out if I'm doing the crediting right but I'm doing marginally better than I normally do with coding.
Lastly if anyone's been wandering around my journal they might notice some things are a changin'. I've been doing some pretty massive coding for easier navigation and updating of tags. I've also orginized my BKWK stories into a chronological order and am systematically fixing the little now cannon errors (mostly revolving around season two not having offices). So if for example you went to reread "Stay" and discovered Eliot went to another apartment he'd commendered for gym like purposes there is nothing wrong with your screen/memory. Don't worry though. All I changed are the details.
Oh, and for anyone who remembers the Cell #8 chapter that wanted to be a trainning montage? This chapter really wanted to be one of those cool episodes where they intercut the finale with music.
As usual, this nicely polished fic is brought to you by she who should be praised: Als_wonderland.
Warnings: Vauge and not so vauge implications of past sexual abuse, angst, and symbolisim.
Chapter one, two, three, four, 5, 6
Lawrence, Kentucky
20 years ago
“…I just want you to know I would have fought for you until the end. But this is for the best. Stay safe. Love, Elie.”
Elie let out a long breath and sighed, putting the letter into the envelope and sealing it up. That was the last thing. Everything was already set. He just needed to leave the letter so Willy could find it and make sure it got to Joey. Then he’d just grab Willy’s keys, go into the garage and fade away into a memory. This town would forget him soon enough, but Joey would be safe and that was what really mattered wasn’t it?
He stood up from the stool, checking the kitchen clock. It was past midnight and the house had been quiet a long time. No one would be getting up for another four or five hours. That should be enough time. And even if they did, who checked the garage first thing in the morning?
Just leave the note on the counter.
He picked up the keys to Willy’s car.
Walked out to the house’s garage where He kept the family car. Shut the door and windows before turning on the car, to make sure no one heard it start up.
He sat in the seat for a moment, already slipping away, even though he knew that was just in his head.
He got out of the car, went into the corner of the garage near the exhaust and laid down.
He was Tired. Sleep wouldn't ease his kind of Tired, but sleep would bring Rest.
Everything was taken care of, as best he could. He could lay down now, and Rest. The pain would be over soon.
~*~
Eliot woke up with a start, coughing, pulling away from the warmth of the exhaust of the tailpipe it took a moment to recognize as Nate’s breath. He sat up, taking a few deep breaths, trying to pull himself back to the present. Pull himself away from the dream and memory.
Nate sat up, rubbing his eyes, disoriented. Eliot knew he wasn’t used to being woken by Eliot’s nightmare after Eliot was already awake. Nate was a light sleeper when he wasn’t drunk and the first sign of thrashing normally was all he needed.
A cautious hand touched Eliot’s shoulder and he tensed. He hated the fact that yesterday morning Nate would have pulled him into an embrace.
And that yesterday morning, Eliot would have been sure he wouldn’t have reacted violently to Nate doing so.
“Eliot.”
”Bad dream.” Eliot said. The hand on his shoulder lifted away immediately. He turned, a feat, since he was between Nate and the wall without much room to maneuver, and caught at Nate’s hand, shaking his head. “No.” He said simply, hoping Nate understood he hadn’t been dreaming about that. Nate met his eyes, the same unasked question lingering there. He never asked what Eliot dreamt about. He never once asked what memories had become the nightmares that haunted, and had long ago driven Eliot to sleep in short brief bursts that rarely allowed dreaming.
But Eliot knew he wondered. Knew he wanted to know. Wanted to help ease away those old wounds like he had the scars Eliot carried. Eliot hadn’t been willing to share before. Too often his mind slipped between one and another but never failed to slip back to when he first learned fear.
Eliot closed his eyes and sighed. “It was three nights before I sent Joey away. I tried to kill myself.” Nate blinked, non-comprehending. “I’d had enough.” Eliot said with a matter of fact shrug, sliding off the foot of the bed and heading out the door.
He needed air. He needed to clear his head. He had to be on his game today.
~*~
Breakfast was a strange affair that morning. The Leverage group was a rowdy bunch and with the breakfast feast Eliot and Joey had gotten together to feed the seven of them there was more than the usual mess going on. It didn’t completely mask the fact that the group's mood as a whole couldn’t seem to decide between trying to cheer up the little boy in their midst (with little success), and being somber in respect of Marie still being missing.
They were trying to act as normal as physically possible but they were all waiting for the phone to ring. They were all waiting for the next move to begin so everything could be over.
None of them liked the plan. None of them liked that the plan had Eliot going in alone. Nate was watching him as Eliot worked over the stove, calling El over to help him with the latest batch of pancakes to replenish the plate. Parker and Hardison had utterly demolished it before the others had even gotten to it.
He seemed stable enough. He’d pulled back and away from what he was going through but didn’t seem to be crossing into Black Knight territory.
But his confession about his dream had Nate worried. Okay, the entire plan had him worried. It depended on Eliot’s mental stability holding through to the end, in face of all this.
And Nate now knew that Eliot had actually taken steps to kill himself before Cairo, where he’d been suicidal for god only knew how long before Nate met him.
It was hard to reconcile the Eliot they knew now, with the Eliot then. After all, wasn’t Eliot famous because he always survived? Wasn’t it his survival instincts that made him such a fighter?
But Nate knew different. Back in the beginning, when this all had started after that wedding fiasco Eliot had clarified for him. “Not survival, self preservation. There’s a difference. Self preservation knows when your best option is to just lay down an die.”
His only comfort was the statement that Eliot had said next. “When that happens you better have a lot of good reasons to keep on fighting.” He’d said Nate had been his good reason a couple of times. Back in Cairo, when they first met, Nate had been his only reason.
Now Eliot had seven very good reasons. Nate hoped that was enough.
He and Sophie were finally getting a taste of the pancakes Hardison was accusing Eliot of lacing with crack when the telephone rang.
Eliot answered it, freezing up and answering with a voice that had just a hint of fear in it. “…Yes Daddy.”
Nate knew Eliot was playing along with a madman, at least in part, but hearing those words twisted, knowing what had been done… it fed the already blazing urge Nate had to throttle That Man.
By the set expressions of the others at the table, Nate had a feeling he was far from alone in the sentiment. If they had their way Eliot would not be doing the hitting this time around.
At least not all of it.
“…I’ll bring it Daddy. May I please speak to Marie?” Eliot closed his eyes and let out a long breath. “I am sorry. I’ll be there soon. Love you too.”
Definitely not all of it.
~*~
They were to go to the Picnic House again. Specifically, Eliot was supposed to go to the picnic house. Alone. With cash. Not that any one of them thought the cash was the important part to anyone involved.
Eliot was, seemingly, going in alone. He had his com in though, and Nate, Parker, and Sophie were making their way there separately, ready to pull in and provide backup. Hardison was staying home with Joey and El ‘just in case’.
Eliot took one last look over his shoulder, drawing in a sharp breath when he saw a small blue eyed boy looking out the upstairs window. He told himself that it was just El.
He ignored that he’d left El with Hardison as the hacker had decided to take it upon himself to keep the boy entertained by introducing him to the joys of “Wow”.
He turned back to look down the road, trying to shake off the chilling sensation, putting the truck into gear.
This world will never be what I expected
And if I don’t belong who would have guessed it?
I will not leave alone, everything I own
To make you feel like it’s not too late
It’s never too late…
Eliot went in alone, but it was only a minute or two before he addressed them over the coms. “He’s not here.” There was something shaken, off, in his voice. Nate wondered at it, but didn’t comment.
The others were already on their way out of the car and into the picnic house. Eliot was standing outside, leaning against the barn with his eyes closed, looking like he was trying to hold it together.
“Anything inside?” Nate asked and Eliot hesitated only half beat before shaking his head. Nate didn’t need the small hint of a lie, probably only present because it was so against Eliot’s instincts to lie to him. He could tell by the way Eliot was reacting that there had been some small surprise left for him inside. Even if Eliot was trying to keep control it had gotten a true reaction out of him.
But Nate, and the others, left it alone. They knew all they needed. If Eliot wanted to tell them he would but they wouldn’t go prodding further into this nightmare.
“What do we do now?” Sophie asked. “Just go back and wait again? We need to stop playing along with this.”
“We have to be careful.” Nate insisted, taking brief shelter in doing his job and playing his part. “Lawrence has a hostage. We take this too fast and she could wind up dead.”
“We take this to slow and she will be dead!” Parker argued, as usual saying what none of them actually wanted said out loud.
There was a pained, awkward silence broken by the sound of Nate’s cell phone ringing. He picked it up, seeing it was Hardison calling. “Hardison?”
Hardison's voice was soft and shallow, laced with panic. “He took her.”
Nate let the shock show on his face. “Who… Joey?”
“I don’t know how… lord, Eliot’s going to kill me, but Lawrence found a way through my system. I didn’t even know he was in the house until I heard the front door slam. I grabbed El and got out as soon as we could.”
Hardison was rambling, worried, anxiety plain in his voice and Nate could only think of a million different reasons for it. “Okay, just stay calm. Take El and go to someplace safe. There’s a train station in town not far from where you are. Stay there and wait for us to get in touch.
They hung up and Nate turned to the others. “He took Joey, Hardison got El out. They’re going somewhere safe.” He spoke bluntly, this wasn’t a situation to soften the news.
Eliot’s reaction was immediate. He took in a sharp breath, his posture, his entire demeanor changing as he’d let it out. It was a shift to something more violent, getting into the headspace he stayed in while he fought. Nate only hoped he could stay there without going further.
Another sharp breath and something inside seemed to give way. Eliot moved, brushing past Sophie, not even trying to avoid bumping into her, as he broke away from the circle and the barn all together.
He’d need space to get his mind in order, deal with that this was happening, before they could take action.
They waited a few minutes before Nate spoke, calling over the com. “Eliot?”
Silence.
“Eliot, it’s time to come back.”
Nothing.
“Eliot.”
“He’s gone.” Hardison said over the com, actual panic rising in his voice. “He took out his com. He’s gone off script.”
Sophie started fumbling with her jacket and bag. After a moment she looked up at Nate, her eyes wide. She didn’t explain, just opened her jacket so he could see where she’d attached a holster for a gun on the inside.
It was empty.
The bottom of his stomach dropped out. This was so far off book…
He dialed Eliot’s cell in a last vain effort, getting immediately sent to voice mail. “Eliot!”
Even if I say It’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll turn it around
Cause it’s not to late, it’s never to late
“Spencer! Spencer! Wake up damnit!”
Elie coughed, words penetrating through the haze, dragging him back to the lucid world. He coughed again, his lungs burning a little even as the cool night air threatened to chill him further. Soft, night damp, grass beneath him reminded him that he’d gone to sleep lying on concrete trusting he wouldn’t wake up.
“Come on son. Don’t make me take you to a hospital. I don’t wanna be the one to give Lawrence a reason to hit you.”
Willy. It was Willy’s voice. Willy had found him.
He opened his eyes, blinking until his sight cleared and he could see the worried man standing above him. “wh… how?”
“You idiot boy. I could kill you for scaring me like that. Aint you got any sense in that head of yours?” Elie just blinked up at him. He didn’t know how to respond, or explain. He’d never really thought he’d have to. The fact Willy was pissed at him, something Elie had only experienced the night he brought Ames home an hour late from their date, wasn’t helping.
He closed his eyes and looked away, slumping against the ground wishing it would just absorb him, take him. “Tired.” He whispered.
The hands that touched him a moment later were gentle, somehow bypassing his normal dislike to contact, easing him so he was sitting up. “I know son. I know” Willy whispered. “but you gotta get up and keep walking. What’s your sister gonna do if you lay down an’ die.”
Elie mumbled a protest but instinctively helped, sitting up under his own power and when those hands urged him to his feet he rose and let them stabilize him before he opened his eyes. He felt like a puppet with most of his strings cut, but he was moving. Willy was telling him to and he did what Willy said, always. After the life he’d lived, it was the only way he could really think of showing the man how much he meant to Elie.
“Walk with me.” Willy instructed. “Walk with me and tell me what this was about.” Elie nodded and they started to walk. It was slow at first as Elie got his feet under him and his equilibrium back, but apparently he hadn’t been in there long enough for any kind of serious damage.
They’d reached the stables and were walking through the darkened hallway when Willy broke the silence. “What happened?” They both knew he meant more than what Elie was up to in the garage.
“Nothing. I’m just tired.”
“Something happened. You were tired last week. You were tired last year. You’ve been tired as long as I’ve known you. But you weren’t trying to kill yourself then.” There was a long pained pause before he pressed on, making the logical guess. “Was it Joey?” Elie looked over at Willy, surprise showing on his face
“This afternoon, you were desperate to get her as far from that man as possible. Really desperate. So far, you’ve trusted yourself to keep her safe, but this afternoon you were scared.” He trailed off. “You’ve been set on just surviving and protecting her until now. What changed?”
“I have to get her out.” Elie said not looking at him. “I can’t do this anymore. I… If I die… there’ll be a body. He won’t be able to claim I ran away because I’m a restless youngster. The town’ll… my friends… they won’t just look away if I’m dead. They’ll make sure she’s alright.” He closed his eyes. “And the pain will stop.”
Willy’s hand touched his shoulder and he winced away, hating himself for it but there was too much. Willy normally knew not to touch him. Everyone knew Elie didn’t like to be touched. “What happened?” Willy prodded one more time.
”…He called her pretty last week.” Elie said, barely at a whisper. “First nice thing he’s said to her in years. Yesterday he bought her ribbons for her hair.”
“He’s drunk and playing with half a deck. Maybe he’s just being nice.”
“She’s almost thirteen.” Elie muttered, the words coming out as if he’d been declaring her terminally ill.
“What?” Willy asked, not understanding.
“She’s almost thirteen. When I was almost thirteen he started noticing me. He brought home a baseball cap. Got me a birthday present.” His voice turned bitter. “A month later he gave me another special present.”
”…Spencer…” There was horror there, just a hint of it, just the beginning of a comprehension there.
“She’s almost thirteen.” He said, turning back to meet Willy’s eyes. “I need to get her out. I get her out and it’s over. It all ends. After that I don’t care, it’s way too late for me ta care. I just want to end it before it’s to late for her too.”
Willy let out a long slow breath. Elie could see rage and grief battling across his face before he took another breath and spoke. “I’ll help you get her out.” Elie opened his mouth to argue, to say that it couldn’t work, that if Willy so much as tried the Lawrence's would bury him before it did Elie any good. Willy shook his head. “It’s a gamble but I think I have a plan, and this is something I should have done a long time ago.” Willy chewed his lip then nodded. “We can end this. I just need you to hang on a little while longer. Then it’ll be over. Can you do that?”
Elie nodded jerkily. For Willy he could hold himself together a little longer.
This world will never see this side reflected
And if there's something wrong who would have guessed it
And I have left alone everything that I own
To make you feel like it’s not too late
It’s never too late
No answer. No answer on Eliot’s cell. According to Hardison, he’d smashed it the day before.
The plan had been going smoothly. Hardison had found the wire taps and hidden cameras and everything That Man was using to monitor the Picnic House and the Phillips Household early on in their stay. Eliot had been able to predict his actions nearly to a T. Joey had already put herself in to act as bait and the others had been surprised to find Eliot needed little convincing to let her do so after they had a brief, private, chat.
Joey had been given a com and half a dozen tracking devices hidden in her clothes and on her body. Hardison had left a loophole anyone with basic coding would be able to find, relying on a basic something or other Nate hadn’t really had the processing capacity at that moment to understand.
Eliot had made it clear to the others that the best way to draw That Man out would be to make him believe Eliot was breaking under the pressure and give him a perceived bargaining chip. As a kid, That Man had broken him to the bridle and kept him there with threats to Joey. Once he felt like he’d managed to return Eliot to that headspace, he wouldn’t be afraid to face a career Hitter. Until that confrontation, Eliot would play a role, himself, slipping back and breaking down.
They knew there was a risk. That it was only a matter of time before something gave. But Eliot had insisted it was the quickest way to end this. The quickest way to get Marie home.
Now Eliot was racing toward a confrontation and Nate didn’t even know if it was the White Knight or the Black who was going in.
Or which would be the one to come out again.
Hardison’s voice over the com broke Nate’s train of thought. “I activated the tracking device.” It took Nate a moment to remember how a year or more ago he had managed to convince Eliot to let them implant a tracking device in his body as a precaution against the more painful pitfalls Hitters were doomed to experience at least a few times in their career: capture. “Get in the car. I’ll tell you how to follow him.”
They piled into the car praying they’d reach Eliot before it was too late.
Even if you say it’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll it around cause
It’s not too late, it’s never too late.
Joey hadn’t said a word since the woman came to the door and took mama into another room to tell her the bad news. Elie knew, that Joey knew what this meant, what was about to happen. She wouldn’t look at Elie. After years of spending every possible moment together when at home, they were now on opposite sides of the room and Joey was making no move to correct that.
When Elie walked over to her she stiffened, not looking up, refusing to meet his eyes. Betrayal, hurt, fear, grief. Everything he never wanted to see in his sister.
“Joey, Joey, listen to me alright?” He put his hands on her shoulders, willing her to just look at him. “I’m sorry. But this… this is just how things have to go. I… I can’t do this any more. I’m not going to make it much longer. I need to know you’re safe.” She wouldn’t meet his eyes, wouldn’t speak. “I need you to go with this woman an…and try and make a life for yourself. Take care of yourself, be good, and work hard. You can be someone, have a decent life, get away from here… far away.”
She still wouldn’t meet his eyes but when he pulled her in for one last hug, clinging tightly to her knowing he’d probably die before he saw her again, she clung back even tighter.
Later he’d remember bits and pieces. The lady coming out. His mother starting to cry. Joey taking the lady’s hand and declining the chance to hug her mother one last time. The door slamming shut behind them. Joey looking out the back window of the car, finally meeting his eyes just before she disappeared around a corner.
Standing there, feeling nothing.
The World we knew it won’t come back
Eliot walked into the old garage on the back acres of one of the Lawrence’s estates. His eyes skipped over the sight of That Man to behind him, where Joey sat, arms wrapped around a small figure even though her hands were cuffed together, the links looped around an exposed pipe.
The time we lost we can’t get back
A small blonde head turned, Marie’s scared blue eyes meeting his across the room. From the distance he couldn’t tell the difference between her and Joey at that age.
The life we had won’t be ours again
He turned his eyes back to That Man, Andrew Lawrence. Standing in the middle of a time decayed garage, the monster from his childhood had been replace by a balding middle aged man with thinning features, small eyes, and ragged clothes. He smiled, showing tobacco-yellowed teeth and Eliot felt the ghost of a sizzle and burn of a cigar being put out in his skin.
He bit down the fear, the anger, the desire to kill. He saw red but breathed through it. Standing straighter, shedding the role he’d played, he met Andrew Lawrence’s eyes. Eliot smiled and fear played across Lawrence’s face. In the back of his mind Hardison’s voice suggested some suitable movie quotes for this moment when he took revenge. It pulled him back and Eliot’s smile faded. “Joey, cover Marie’s eyes.” He said coldly, never taking his eyes off That Man.
In one motion Eliot drew the gun he’d taken off of Sophie earlier, clicked off the safety and pointed it at the man in front of him. He didn’t like guns, but he knew how to use them. He took a breath, steadied himself, aimed, and fired.
This world will never be what I expected.
Spencer had been standing off to the side, uncomfortable in his tux and bored with having to keep an eye on his little sis who was much too excited to be a flower girl and far too young to be forced to stand still for this long. He’d been thinking about how much he was looking forward to cake and ice cream Mama had promised him when her Boyfriend, his stepfather he amended himself, since the vows were now over and there had been a suitably icky sight of seeing his mama kiss someone, called him and Joey over.
They walked together onto the stage to meet their mother and new dad. The man knelt down to be eye level with the two kids, smiling brightly at them. “Hey there you two.” He said softly. “I’m your father now. I promise to take good care of you.” He smiled at Spencer and Spencer smiled back, relieved. Mom’s boyfriend had never liked him or Joey. He’d yelled and sometimes he grabbed Spencer a little too hard. But he was promising to take care of them and people always did what they promised. Things would be better now, for everyone.
“Okay daddy.” Eliot said, smiling brightly. The assembled guests cheered, but the man’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.
And if I don’t belong…
The bullet hit it’s target and Andrew Lawrence fell to the floor.
Dead.
Even if you say it’ll be alright
Still I hear you say you want to end your life
Now and again we try to just stay alive
Maybe we’ll turn it around cause it’s not to late
It’s never to late
They’d arrived at the scene in time to hear a single gunshot. They moved quickly, surging out of the car.
They didn’t make it to the door before Joey emerged with Maria. Both were crying but at the horrified looks on their faces Joey shook her head and looked down, trying to sooth Maria. “Eliot’s alive. That Man is dead.”
She stepped to the side and Nate went forward, hearing Sophie hold the others back.
He entered the dark garage and saw Eliot crouched beside That Man’s corpse, his face obscured by his hair and posture betraying nothing. A pistol that had been emptied of it’s remaining rounds sat nearby.
Nate moved cautiously toward Eliot, trying to determine what state of mind the Hitter was in, and if it was safe to try to comfort him.
Eliot broke the silence, his voice calm, soft, and cold. “He had to die to end the threat. If I didn’t one of you would have.” Nate let out a long breath. He hadn’t consciously thought about it, what they were planning on doing with Lawrence once they took him down. They all wanted revenge for what he’d done, but he had nothing to take but his life, and Nate had to admit maybe, when it was one of their own, they weren’t above taking that.
Eliot turned to look up at Nate, face unreadable. “I hurt people. I’ve killed. A little more won’t make a difference, but I won’t let that man hurt any of my family, even if it’s just by being their first kill.” He looked back down. “I don’t like guns. They make it not personal. It’s easy ta kill without feeling a thing. I thought… but…”
Nate closed his eyes, swallowing the bile in his throat and biting down the horror at what Eliot had barely avoided. Eliot’s violence was born from the abuse dealt by that man. It was something Eliot struggled to control, to keep the monster controlled. He’d known taking revenge on Eliot's abuser might make him lose it, make him let go, let the Black Knight take hold.
He’d killed that man with a gun to make it about protecting the team. Not about revenge.
“It felt good.” Eliot confessed. “First kill in years that’s felt good.”
“He tortured you for seven years.” Nate said softly, resting a hand on Eliot’s shoulder, giving him an anchor. “I’d be more worried if you didn’t feel anything.”
“It’s over now. He can’t hurt us. You can’t hurt him. We’re still alive. It’s over.”
Maybe we’ll turn it all around cause it’s not too late
It’s never too late
There was clean up and wrap up to do, but mostly they had to leave. They wiped down the few things that had been touched and disappeared, leaving only the gun behind. It was a hitter’s weapon, and police would have to trace it through five hostile countries to even pin it to an alias.
No one spoke more than necessary. No one was even sure what there could possibly be left to say.
It was when they were driving back up the driveway to the Phillips house and had turned the corner that Marie spoke for the first time since she’d been rescued. “Dad’s car! He’s home!” She pointed toward the blue car parked in front of the house.
Sophie smiled, as after Hardison had rewired the tapped lines at the house the night before, Josephine had called her husband. Hardison had met him at the train station earlier to make sure he stayed out of harms way until the all clear was given.
A few moments later El came bounding out the front door followed quickly by his father with Hardison exiting last.
The car had barely stopped when Marie was opening her door and scrambling out of her seat belt and onto the ground, running to her father and big brother. Joey followed with only a little more caution, the family completely reunited by the time everyone else had climbed out of the car.
Hardison joined the team in watching the Phillips take stock of each other and reassure themselves and each other (both children and parents) that they were going to be okay.
Marie must have said something then, because her father picked her up to sit on his shoulders, settling her before holding out one hand for El to hold and wrapping the other around Joey. They walked back toward the house.
Before they disappeared El glanced up to his sister then back to the team, meeting Eliot’s eyes and then followed his family inside.
In that moment, Sophie saw a young boy’s ghost finally laid to rest. It was too late for Eliot, too late to save him the way that really mattered, too late to give him even the half a chance they’d all had.
But it wasn’t too late for El, and in El, Sophie saw what they all saw. Eliot as he might have been, as he should have been, like some cosmic reset button had been pressed after the mistakes were undone.
Eliot sighed and started walking toward the house. Parker moved to catch up to him with Hardison not far behind.
Nate came to stand beside Sophie and they watched together as the other three made their way. There was a trace of something there between them, the old companionship that had come before. Before Sam’s death, before the team split up, before yesterday. A companionship that had been the undertone of a romance that hadn’t happened, a tie that tied the two of them together like it tied all five of them together.
Understanding.
Normal, well adjusted people did not become thieves and they did not become the best at what they did. Those on the team were all who they’d been made to be a long time ago. Part of the reason they could come together like this, why they could work together when they’d spent their whole lives alone, was they all knew that they were who they’d been made to be and it was far too late to change that.
It was too late to make Parker a normal, completely sane woman. Something had just gone wrong.
It was too late for Hardison to go back onto the grid and live a normal life when everything he’s capable of, what defines who he is, is illegal at best.
It was too late for Sophie to learn to tell the truth and stop playing her part and learn to live in a world other than the one she was born into.
It was too late for Nate to go back to seeing the world in black and white instead of shades of gray.
It was too late to save Elie, and too late to fix Eliot.
Laughter and sounds of a scuffle broke through her bleak reverie. Up ahead Hardison and Eliot had gotten into a scuffle and were rough housing while Parker cheered them on, calling out something Sophie wasn’t sure even made sense to the other two involved.
Clearly it didn’t, because the scuffle stopped while the Hardison and Eliot turned to look at Parker with equally perplexed expressions. Parker’s next comment was too soft for Sophie to hear but caused Hardison to back peddle with a shout of “Hell NO”.
And Eliot? He laughed. His face lighting up the way it did sometimes, and Sophie felt a small smile cross her face.
Nate patted her shoulder and went forward to act as referee before the kids got into any more mischief, leaving her with four words and a hint she hadn’t been alone in her train of thought. “It’s not too late.”
It’s not too late, it’s never too late
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