No Worries. It's totally under control, dude.
Yes, I know. No need to remind me. It's totally under control, dude. Stop looking at me like that. It's under control.
Look, if it wasn't totally under control would I be able to use the word "dude"? That word conveys a casual "all is right with the world" attitude and a familiarity that says, "Not only do I know who you are, I am comfortable enough with you to use a nickname for you that I only share with everyone I meet".
Stop looking at me like that. When I say something is under control I mean it. I even made up this sign "Mission accomplished". Not good enough for you? I'll put the aforementioned sign on this wall behind me and stand in front of it. Would I have taken the time to make this sign if I wasn't satisfied everything wasn't under control? Yes I know that was a double negative. Relax DUDE, I know what I'm doing. I just don't unlove the way a double negative doesn't not roll off my tongue.
Let me put it another way...Would I have had the TIME to make this sign if things weren't under control? Of course not. I would be spending all of my time making sure things got back under control.
I don't CARE what you think you saw. I don't care about all the supposed facts you think you know. I don't care that you're worried about all the things still on fire. I would hope my WORD would mean more to you than things like "facts" and "reality". Fine, yes, there are still things on fire and yes, okay, FINE, more things are going to catch on fire in the near future. Yes, even as we speak things are catching fire. But stop focusing on the things that are on fire, and start focusing on the things that are no longer on fire. Start basking in the glow of my victories and not basking in the heat of my failures (but soon-to-be victories). So what? So what if the fire is still going. I said things were under control I didn't say we now lived in Perfectword and I was Mayor McBliss. The fact is, we live in a flammable world and things are going to catch on fire. But they are doing so in a very controlled way.
"Raging out of control?" I don't even know what you mean by that. "Raging"? Are you implying that this fire actual is mad or something? Come on. I don't think so. It's just going about its business...under my watchful eye. Because that fire is so under control that you should REALLY say "It's raging UNDER control" or even "It's apathetically IN control." If anything is out of control it is you, dude. I mean look at you. Running around screaming "I'm on fire! I'm on fire!" Well, duh. Anyone can see that. Thanks for the update CNN. Geesh. See? One quick stop drop and roll later you are no longer on fire. Kinda makes you wonder why you over reacted in the first place.
I wish there was something I could say that would reassure you that things are under control, but I can see there's no talking to you. Even if you hadn't passed out from pain you wouldn't listen to me. Oh great! Now I'm on fire. See what you did? You distracted me and now I'm on fire. But am I going all 911? Nope. It's all under control. Once I jump into this cooling bucket of ethanol - that's probably French for water - it'll be business as usual with everything under control....dude.
Look, if it wasn't totally under control would I be able to use the word "dude"? That word conveys a casual "all is right with the world" attitude and a familiarity that says, "Not only do I know who you are, I am comfortable enough with you to use a nickname for you that I only share with everyone I meet".
Stop looking at me like that. When I say something is under control I mean it. I even made up this sign "Mission accomplished". Not good enough for you? I'll put the aforementioned sign on this wall behind me and stand in front of it. Would I have taken the time to make this sign if I wasn't satisfied everything wasn't under control? Yes I know that was a double negative. Relax DUDE, I know what I'm doing. I just don't unlove the way a double negative doesn't not roll off my tongue.
Let me put it another way...Would I have had the TIME to make this sign if things weren't under control? Of course not. I would be spending all of my time making sure things got back under control.
I don't CARE what you think you saw. I don't care about all the supposed facts you think you know. I don't care that you're worried about all the things still on fire. I would hope my WORD would mean more to you than things like "facts" and "reality". Fine, yes, there are still things on fire and yes, okay, FINE, more things are going to catch on fire in the near future. Yes, even as we speak things are catching fire. But stop focusing on the things that are on fire, and start focusing on the things that are no longer on fire. Start basking in the glow of my victories and not basking in the heat of my failures (but soon-to-be victories). So what? So what if the fire is still going. I said things were under control I didn't say we now lived in Perfectword and I was Mayor McBliss. The fact is, we live in a flammable world and things are going to catch on fire. But they are doing so in a very controlled way.
"Raging out of control?" I don't even know what you mean by that. "Raging"? Are you implying that this fire actual is mad or something? Come on. I don't think so. It's just going about its business...under my watchful eye. Because that fire is so under control that you should REALLY say "It's raging UNDER control" or even "It's apathetically IN control." If anything is out of control it is you, dude. I mean look at you. Running around screaming "I'm on fire! I'm on fire!" Well, duh. Anyone can see that. Thanks for the update CNN. Geesh. See? One quick stop drop and roll later you are no longer on fire. Kinda makes you wonder why you over reacted in the first place.
I wish there was something I could say that would reassure you that things are under control, but I can see there's no talking to you. Even if you hadn't passed out from pain you wouldn't listen to me. Oh great! Now I'm on fire. See what you did? You distracted me and now I'm on fire. But am I going all 911? Nope. It's all under control. Once I jump into this cooling bucket of ethanol - that's probably French for water - it'll be business as usual with everything under control....dude.