Epiphany served raw with a dash of self-realization.
I just figured that I have five things I do in life. Now obviously there are thousands of different things to do in life and I do lots of them but for the sake of argument,
Five.Basic.Things.
1.Work: around 30+ to 40+ hours a week at a pharmacy(Missouri law prohibits me from saying which one...just kidding)
2.School: History, Math, Physical education 107, Physical education 106(fencing), all these are at Longview Community College. Biology at Cristos Something(read: shitty "christian" school)
3.Wishing I could figure out someway to make my life count for something by helping those who need it. If there's one thing I have learned in my 17 years on God's mud-ball it's that the most rewarding, fulfilling and basically worth-while thing one can do is help people.
4.Wishing I could get rid of what's left of my conscience and get down to killing people who deserve it(basically most of the people I come into contact with on a daily basis). I'm not talking about serial killers to rapists to pedophiles. I'm talking about those people to people who basically ignore what's wrong with the world and only concern their selfish minds with makings sure that they (and those they live with/fuck/take care of because they fucked...Read:family) live happily ever after in that dream house with the evening news as their only connection to the outside world.
5.Watching movies. Lot's of 'em. Basically trying to avoid having to make either of the last two things come true.
I have to be awake again in 4 hours and 28 minutes so that I can go to work. Shit.
Sidenote: I think I've figured out my problem. I'm really good at a myriad of things (I know, I know. What modesty)But I'm not a master of anything...hmmmmm.
Five.Basic.Things.
1.Work: around 30+ to 40+ hours a week at a pharmacy(Missouri law prohibits me from saying which one...just kidding)
2.School: History, Math, Physical education 107, Physical education 106(fencing), all these are at Longview Community College. Biology at Cristos Something(read: shitty "christian" school)
3.Wishing I could figure out someway to make my life count for something by helping those who need it. If there's one thing I have learned in my 17 years on God's mud-ball it's that the most rewarding, fulfilling and basically worth-while thing one can do is help people.
4.Wishing I could get rid of what's left of my conscience and get down to killing people who deserve it(basically most of the people I come into contact with on a daily basis). I'm not talking about serial killers to rapists to pedophiles. I'm talking about those people to people who basically ignore what's wrong with the world and only concern their selfish minds with makings sure that they (and those they live with/fuck/take care of because they fucked...Read:family) live happily ever after in that dream house with the evening news as their only connection to the outside world.
5.Watching movies. Lot's of 'em. Basically trying to avoid having to make either of the last two things come true.
I have to be awake again in 4 hours and 28 minutes so that I can go to work. Shit.
Sidenote: I think I've figured out my problem. I'm really good at a myriad of things (I know, I know. What modesty)But I'm not a master of anything...hmmmmm.