Please Listen (This is a rant post, so do not open if you are not prepared.)
A poem I got from a book about listening:
“When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why
I shouldn’t feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something
to solve my problem,
you have failed me,
strange as that may seem.
Listen! All I ask is that you listen.
Don’t talk or do - just hear me.”
I felt nobody really listened.
I know what to do: check papers, make long exam, prepare syllabus, enroll thesis, revise thesis, send out survey forms, text mom for money, go to gym (attend cycling, step, and combat), hear mass, reflect on what kind of person I want to be, run, jump, jog, move around, go out with friends, call home.
But last night, I just want someone to listen to me. Me. Not to process what happened, but just listen.
I texted you, you replied that you were sad too.
I texted you, you suggested for me to go out for the night.
I texted you, you said, “Is empathy really what you need? I disagree with your terms.”
I texted you, you replied, “I miss the El that I met.”
I texted you, you replied, “Everybody have there own concerns, you cannot expect them to be empathizing with you.”
Last night, I felt I was not important. (Do not pity me, I am not pitiful.)
* * * *
Do not worry, when I woke up today, I know better. I cannot really depend much on others, I can only depend on myself.
“When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why
I shouldn’t feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something
to solve my problem,
you have failed me,
strange as that may seem.
Listen! All I ask is that you listen.
Don’t talk or do - just hear me.”
I felt nobody really listened.
I know what to do: check papers, make long exam, prepare syllabus, enroll thesis, revise thesis, send out survey forms, text mom for money, go to gym (attend cycling, step, and combat), hear mass, reflect on what kind of person I want to be, run, jump, jog, move around, go out with friends, call home.
But last night, I just want someone to listen to me. Me. Not to process what happened, but just listen.
I texted you, you replied that you were sad too.
I texted you, you suggested for me to go out for the night.
I texted you, you said, “Is empathy really what you need? I disagree with your terms.”
I texted you, you replied, “I miss the El that I met.”
I texted you, you replied, “Everybody have there own concerns, you cannot expect them to be empathizing with you.”
Last night, I felt I was not important. (Do not pity me, I am not pitiful.)
* * * *
Do not worry, when I woke up today, I know better. I cannot really depend much on others, I can only depend on myself.