....i am so thankful that you say that you don't understand what i'm saying... i know in this case it is because i haven't given the story, but oh so often i realize that people don't understand what i'm saying although they should... and they don't even say that they don't! ...
you know, i have returned home.. i was a away for almost 4 months, ...and i miss the environment in general, and something particular, too.. at home..my life is so different. and..i feel confused. there are some things i want to do at home here and i feel attached to, but at the same time it is nothing of he utmost importance.. i could just leave.. and enter the troubled world that would await me there, because ...i have nothing there. except some people and a city i have grown to love. i guess it's a long story... and i think you're right when you say that i need some time to think it over, without any pressure... because i believe i can get over what is it that i lack.. telling myself stories i never needed it anyway and i will have it some other place, too, some time soon... here, i live in a little place.. Bremen helped me get used to city life, the comfortable, cosy, beautiful city life that Bremen offers.. and there are some people i miss so. but can't really contact. aah. i've written a lot. home..is very narrow, very binding, very uncomfortable, with all the people, duties and other things to do..it keeps me nervous..
and thank you :) thank you thank you thank you........!
What you have has a name. It is called homesickness. It is what I have when I return from Crete. Although if I would to live there, life would probably be harder than in Holland. The love you feel from the people etc. is amazing.
You need time to feel "at home again". Those people might be able to help, you know make plans and go to movies.
You just feel kind of empty right now because you have left so much behind. You need to fill the void left behind. But that does not have to happen this moment. You can take your time to first heal a little.
But having people around is the key!
And I think I know how you feel when you are talking about something and you have the feeling they don't understand,...but they don't ask. You feel like they don't care.
They are busy in their mind with their own world. That hurts.
God yes.... that space needs to be filled.......! and although i got used to being home very quickly... since it is my home, you know, ...still... in my dreams i'm missing the flight home.. and.and i don't remember what happened this night in my dream. :D
there was a person, and i have realized i have not know anybody like that, and i'm afraid i never will.. and i am sorry i cannot use this moment that the world gave me...this person. you know... you get many people you like, many different people... and then there is one who you don't just like or understand, but... feel... in this understanding that overwhelms! ... i'm looking to fill this hole, too, although there's not much to fill since i didn't really get to know this person because of the strange fear i had.. nothing but music can fill this emptiness of not having what i didn't even have. ugh.
and yes, i notice that it is easier to keep alright if i'm not alone... a few evenings ago i was alone... and it got bad...really bad. some say that these emotions are valuable, too..
another problem is that my mom's returning home in less than a week, too, and i know we have money problems now, and when it comes to that... she just won't let me be slower and take my time to heal.. so it's gonna be difficult... but i still have some time. two weeks after returning should be enough, huh? :)
In my case: The music and Johnny Depp helps me when I am lonely. I don't have that special someone in my life as well. I am not out there though. I love to stay home with my cats and love to work. Than you don't meet that many people. AND, as all my friends almost have a partner..... Well, I guess some one is out there for all of us.
you know, i have returned home.. i was a away for almost 4 months, ...and i miss the environment in general, and something particular, too.. at home..my life is so different. and..i feel confused. there are some things i want to do at home here and i feel attached to, but at the same time it is nothing of he utmost importance.. i could just leave.. and enter the troubled world that would await me there, because ...i have nothing there. except some people and a city i have grown to love. i guess it's a long story... and i think you're right when you say that i need some time to think it over, without any pressure... because i believe i can get over what is it that i lack.. telling myself stories i never needed it anyway and i will have it some other place, too, some time soon...
here, i live in a little place.. Bremen helped me get used to city life, the comfortable, cosy, beautiful city life that Bremen offers.. and there are some people i miss so. but can't really contact. aah. i've written a lot. home..is very narrow, very binding, very uncomfortable, with all the people, duties and other things to do..it keeps me nervous..
and thank you :) thank you thank you thank you........!
Reply
It is what I have when I return from Crete.
Although if I would to live there, life would probably be harder than in Holland. The love you feel from the people etc. is amazing.
You need time to feel "at home again".
Those people might be able to help, you know make plans and go to movies.
You just feel kind of empty right now because you have left so much behind. You need to fill the void left behind.
But that does not have to happen this moment. You can take your time to first heal a little.
But having people around is the key!
And I think I know how you feel when you are talking about something and you have the feeling they don't understand,...but they don't ask. You feel like they don't care.
They are busy in their mind with their own world.
That hurts.
Reply
there was a person, and i have realized i have not know anybody like that, and i'm afraid i never will.. and i am sorry i cannot use this moment that the world gave me...this person. you know... you get many people you like, many different people... and then there is one who you don't just like or understand, but... feel... in this understanding that overwhelms! ... i'm looking to fill this hole, too, although there's not much to fill since i didn't really get to know this person because of the strange fear i had.. nothing but music can fill this emptiness of not having what i didn't even have. ugh.
and yes, i notice that it is easier to keep alright if i'm not alone... a few evenings ago i was alone... and it got bad...really bad. some say that these emotions are valuable, too..
another problem is that my mom's returning home in less than a week, too, and i know we have money problems now, and when it comes to that... she just won't let me be slower and take my time to heal.. so it's gonna be difficult... but i still have some time. two weeks after returning should be enough, huh? :)
thank you again...thank you every time:)
Reply
I don't have that special someone in my life as well.
I am not out there though.
I love to stay home with my cats and love to work.
Than you don't meet that many people.
AND, as all my friends almost have a partner.....
Well, I guess some one is out there for all of us.
Reply
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