Surviving the Hellatus: The J2 Canon - Cry_Wolf
Hearken back to the pre-series days when Our Boy was just a wee one. Well, a wee one in spirit; he’s still Ginormo. Prep school shenanigans turn deadly. Hard to tell who’s the baddie. (Okay, it’s not really. I called that shit in the first ten minutes.) This one isn’t as bad as Friday the 13th. It’s got its intrigue.
And, of course, we get full-on Texas!Jared. There’s a hint of an accent, and the lone star flag hanging on the wall, and his whole persona is a little bit like a wild cowboy. If Sam ever acted this way, I think I would pee my pants. Seriously.
“Big Tex” takes on a whole new meaning.
We also get bonus Sandra McCoy and bonus Jared-on-Sandra hating. Then he plugs her in Season 3. What’s up with him dissing his womenfolk in movies and TV?
Never mind. Sometimes I’m for it.
Last but not least, the bonus features. I sat through the entirety of the casting segment, only to discover that Jared’s audition tape isn’t in the mix for some reason. Sigh.
Scoring:
Jared’s Hair (10 being Season 3, 1 being the L’Oreal commercial): 1 What. The. Fuck. Is. This. It’s like Barbarino and Cassidy rolled together. It’s awful.
Jensen’s Voice (10 being Damian the LARPer, 1 being the pilot): 1 Our Boy’s barely grown up here, yo.
Jared’s Body (10 being lanky season 1, 1 being ‘roided up mid-season 5): 8 Would be better without untucked dress shirts hiding it.
Brotherly Love (10 being the early years, 1 being “Sex and Violence”): --5 Our Boy’s naughty toward his roommate. And not in a good way.
Use of women’s bodies (10 being tit for tat, 1 being naked Ruby and Meg torture while Sam and Dean torture is merely shoeless): 4 Sandra McCoy starts to take a shower but doesn’t get very far. Lindy Booth (Dodger) gets rescued from a swimming pool.
And, of course, we get full-on Texas!Jared. There’s a hint of an accent, and the lone star flag hanging on the wall, and his whole persona is a little bit like a wild cowboy. If Sam ever acted this way, I think I would pee my pants. Seriously.
“Big Tex” takes on a whole new meaning.
We also get bonus Sandra McCoy and bonus Jared-on-Sandra hating. Then he plugs her in Season 3. What’s up with him dissing his womenfolk in movies and TV?
Never mind. Sometimes I’m for it.
Last but not least, the bonus features. I sat through the entirety of the casting segment, only to discover that Jared’s audition tape isn’t in the mix for some reason. Sigh.
Scoring:
Jared’s Hair (10 being Season 3, 1 being the L’Oreal commercial): 1 What. The. Fuck. Is. This. It’s like Barbarino and Cassidy rolled together. It’s awful.
Jensen’s Voice (10 being Damian the LARPer, 1 being the pilot): 1 Our Boy’s barely grown up here, yo.
Jared’s Body (10 being lanky season 1, 1 being ‘roided up mid-season 5): 8 Would be better without untucked dress shirts hiding it.
Brotherly Love (10 being the early years, 1 being “Sex and Violence”): --5 Our Boy’s naughty toward his roommate. And not in a good way.
Use of women’s bodies (10 being tit for tat, 1 being naked Ruby and Meg torture while Sam and Dean torture is merely shoeless): 4 Sandra McCoy starts to take a shower but doesn’t get very far. Lindy Booth (Dodger) gets rescued from a swimming pool.