Fic: All the Stars Play for Me (1/3)
Title: All the Stars Play for Me
Fandom: Glee
Rating: M
Pairing/Characters: Rachel/Finn, ensemble
Setting/Spoilers: general spoils, but nothing specific--it's a near!future!fic
Warnings: sexual situations, language
Summary: senior year at McKinley.
A/N: Title and lyrics come from "Singing in My Sleep" by Semisonic.
All alone on the overpass,
Wired and phoned to a heart of glass.
Now I'm falling in love too fast
With you or the songs you chose.
And all the stars play for me.
Say the promise you long to keep,
I can hear you singing to me in my sleep.
i.
He catches her before she can leave the airport with her dads.
"We're together again now, right?" he asks, because he has to be sure.
She smiles. "We're together again now," she says.
His insides go soft, and he reaches out and touches her arm, because he can, because they might not have won nationals, but they've won each other back, and he can't really be bothered to care about anything else. "I promise I won't break up with you again," he tells her. He won't. He'll talk to her, and they'll work through their problems, and -
"Don't promise me that," Rachel says. "You can't know if you'll keep that promise."
He frowns.
"Promise me that we're going to try this time, really try," she says. "Promise me that we're not going to lie to each other. That we're always going to say what we really think and what we really feel. Promise me that we won't ever pretend anymore." She smiles again, and his heart beats a little faster.
"I can promise that," he says, and the words almost sick in his throat, because that one word means so much now, and he doesn't think he's ever felt this much of anything for anyone in his whole life. "No more pretending," he tells her.
He can definitely promise that.
ii.
Rachel falls asleep in the middle of Fight Club.
He carries her upstairs after the movie ends, and as much as he wants to take her to his room, he knows he can't. His mom is cool, but she isn't that cool. Kurt and Mercedes are still both down in the basement, and he knows that they've already wrestled control of the DVD player from Puck, and they're probably about to make everyone sit through something like The Devil Wears Prada. It's the Saturday before school starts again, and this is the last real night of summer.
Rachel blinks at him sleepily when he tugs the sheets up over her. He smiles, tells her to go back to sleep, and then looks around for her pink tote bag. She tugs on his arm and mutters something, but he goes over to her bag, and he finds Henrietta, and he hands the purple stuffed hippo to her, because, yeah, his girlfriend can't sleep without her stuffed hippo.
(She sleeps with an entire fleet of animals at her house, like Maurice and Maureen the stuffed monkeys, and Lisa the lamb, but her favourite will always be Henrietta. She told him so when she introduced him to all of her stuffed animals.)
He kisses her softly as she curls up, clutching Henrietta, and then he starts to leave. She stops him, though. "Aren't you going to snuggle with me?" she asks, her voice thick and quiet, and she sounds like a little kid.
Rachel loves to snuggle. He kinda likes that about her - and he thinks he can pass on The Devil Wears Prada. He lies back on the bed, and Rachel immediately takes a hold of his hand and then wraps his arm securely around her, even as she slips her tiny feet between his legs, her toes cold against his calves. "You're always so warm," she murmurs sleepily.
They've spent a lot of the summer like this.
They passed nearly every hot, sticky day watching movies in the Hummel basement with the entire Glee club, and swimming lazily at the lake, and falling asleep to the sound of bad summer television. He even taught her how to drive a lawnmower and how to play basketball. Plus, this summer they've, like, relearned each other.
This summer kinda rocked, basically. But summer is over, and he hates that.
Still, he knows this last year at McKinley is gonna be the best one yet.
iii.
He gives Rachel a ride to school on their first day.
She hands him zucchini bread the moment she climbs up into his truck, because she says he has to start today of all days off well, and she knows he doesn't eat a healthy breakfast. They've had this argument before, but she will never believe that Fruit Loops are a great breakfast food. He isn't gonna complain, though, if that means she'll make him banana bread and blueberry muffins and zucchini bread, which is really good, especially since zucchini is a vegetable, and who knew it could be all cake-like?
He holds her hand as they walk through the halls, and he remembers how totally awesome that was last year, and he pounds fists with a bunch of people, and everything is cool. He always kinda liked the first day of school, even if tomorrow the teachers will suddenly give them homework and stupid stuff like that. Plus, in his first class he munches on more zucchini bread that Rachel told him to save for lunch - it totally makes the class less boring.
Right before he turns towards the cafeteria to meet Rachel for lunch, he spies her still at her locker, decorating the inside, and he sees her put up a framed picture of him. She adjusts the magnetic frame to be perfectly in the center of the locker, surrounded by her star stickers, her puffy pink letters, and her newest to-do list. He goes to his own locker, and he tapes up his schedule, and he grins to himself as he tapes up a picture of them from Nationals.
It's totally lame, he knows, and it's only a matter of time before Puck asks him if it hurt when Finn chopped off his balls to hand them over to Rachel, but he can't help himself. He wants Rachel to know he's as proud to be her boyfriend as she is to be his girlfriend, because he doesn't think she always realises that.
And, for the record, when she sees the picture in his locker right after sixth period, she kisses him in the middle of the hall, like a real kiss with her hands on his shoulders and her tongue in his mouth, until people catcall and Mr. Schue coughs awkwardly. Finn feels like the man.
After school, she, Tina, and Mercedes wait on the bleachers, gossiping or doing whatever girls in groups do, while Finn, Mike, and Sam have football practice, and then they all go out on this triple date to Breadstix to celebrate the first day of senior year.
It's a pretty good first day.
iv.
They talk a lot more now.
He tells her about his early arrival problem, and the mailman, and that very fist kiss they had. She asks why he didn't tell her in all the months they dated, and he admits that he didn't want to look lame. She shakes her head at his confession, and she assures him she finds his overwhelming attraction to her flattering. She even rewards his honesty with kisses all over his face.
She talks about her insecurities, about how she spent so many years absolutely positive that her only real redeeming quality was her talent. She speaks softly, and he listens and rubs her back and tries not to feel like a dick when she talks about how often she used to compare herself to Quinn, and how sometimes she still has to stop herself from doing that.
After she finishes, he tells her that he really did mean what he told her long ago - there are so many great things about her beyond her voice, like how smart she is, and how pretty she is, and how nice she is, and how she always forgives people and tries to see the best in everyone.
They've always talked, but these talks are different. They always end up moving closer to each other as they talk, her sitting in his lap as they eat ice cream in the back of his truck, or lying together on the bed, listening to songs on her ipod, or watching movies in the basement with her head resting on his thigh and his hand running through her hair.
And he realises that she isn't simply the person he loves most. She's also the person he trusts most. He really hasn't ever trusted anybody the way he trusts her. It's kind of terrifying. He tells her that, though, and she smiles and links their hands, leaning against his shoulder as the movie starts.
He's always known Rachel likes to talk.
But now he knows that he kinda likes to talk, too.
v.
They have four new kids in Glee.
It's pretty cool. It's weird, too, though, because he feels like after the last two years, after everything they'll all been through together, they're a kind of family. It took a long, long time to become that way, but that's what they are. By this point, no one in the club really hates anyone else. They all snipe at each other like family, but they all stick up for each other like family, too, at least against people who aren't in Glee club. And these new kids are, like, outsiders.
But Rachel bakes cookies for them and she offers to help each of them with what she considers to be their greatest musical weakness. He honestly thinks, and not for the first time, that she might be the nicest person he knows. Who else would do all that for some freshmen and sophomores she doesn't even know? She tells Finn that they need to make the new students feel welcome. "We want New Directions to live on after we leave," she says.
That seems even weirder than the simple idea of new kids joining their group - he can't really fathom that in a year the Glee club will be an entirely different group. And, plus, come on, what kind of Glee club is New Directions without Rachel? He mentions that to her, and she says that the club can only hope someone with her talent, and someone with his talent, and hopefully also a pairing with their immense chemistry, will come along to save the club.
"And, until then, we will make the most of our final year," she says.
vi.
Bullying still happens. A lot. And that kinda sucks, and Finn wishes he could say that something might actually change at this school to stop that for everyone. He doesn't know if that will ever happen, though.
But everyone in Glee apparently now has this, like, secret pact. Like, when some hockey player starts to toss a slushee at Tina, Quinn screams bloody murder so loudly half the teachers in the building rush over, and the dumbass puckhead loses his guts. He dumps the slushee in the trash. And two days later when a cheerleader trips Rachel, Santana takes the redhead by the hair and throws her to the ground, screaming at her in Spanish.
She then tells Sue, who breaks up the fight, that she isn't about to let some puta mess with one of her girls, and Sue better keep her Cheerios in check. Sue wants Santana - and Quinn and Brittany, too - back on the squad, so she only mutters something under her breath and storms off without a word. And then Rachel wipes at tears of happiness over her newest friendship, and she hugs Santana, who pats her back awkwardly and looks around for someone to make Rachel get off her.
Finn only grins, sends Santana a big thumbs-up, and goes to class.
And then Rachel comes to the rescue when Azimio starts messing with Kurt again. Ever since everything happened with Karofsky, Azimio has been on this tear against Kurt, and on a random Thursday he pushes Kurt against the lockers really hard, and Kurt's books spill all over the floor, and everybody just stares. Finn sees red, and he slams his locker shut and starts towards them, ready to give Azimio a beating.
But before he has the chance, Rachel flies out of nowhere and starts to beat Azimio with her book, like literally smacking any part of him she can reach with some textbook, backing him into a corner and telling him to leave Kurt alone and to bully someone his own size. "Aren't you going to fight back?" she says. "Huh? Huh? What? You can egg me, you can throw slushees at me, you can call me names, you can shove my best friend against a locker, but you won't -"
Finn pulls Rachel away, and she kicks her legs wildly in the air, but he holds tight until she finally gives up as Mr. Schue, Coach Bieste, and a couple other teaches arrive at the scene.
And she always said violence is never the answer. Apparently, even Rachel Berry has a limit.
Rachel, Azimio, and Kurt all have to go to the office. Finn hopes Azimio fries and Rachel and Kurt get off scotch free. Of course, Azimio doesn't really get in any trouble, because bullies in this school never do, but Rachel and Kurt aren't in trouble either. Kurt links arms with Rachel as they strut through the halls together the rest of the day, and Finn thinks they might be his two most favourite people in the world.
A week later, Sam and Mike get in a fight with some guys that try to mess with Artie, and then Lauren backs this one Cheerio who calls Brittany a slut up against the lockers and stares so long and scary-like that the Cheerio bursts into tears.
By October the message is finally respected: the Glee kids might be losers, but nobody messes with them.
vii.
Senior year really takes a turn for the crazy when Quinn, Brittany, and Santana tell Sue they will return to the Cheerios if Sue promises not to mess with the Glee club even a little this year. Sue says yes, but she has one more condition, and when she announces this in front of the entire Glee club, they're all stunned.
She wants Rachel to join the Cheerios too.
"Are you joking?" Quinn asks, because someone has to say something after that bombshell.
"I don't joke about my Cheerios, Q," Sue replies. "I know talent when I see it. What do you say, Berry? You can be the heroine of your precious Glee club, and you can have a free ride to the top of the social ladder and be among the best and most elite at this school."
Rachel only stares, opening and closing her mouth for a minute, and then she glances at Finn.
"Why don't you give Rachel some time to think about your offer, Sue," Mr. Schue says. She agrees, glancing at Rachel one more time before she leaves the room. The rest of Glee practice is sort of awkward, and Rachel is quiet for a long time. Finn really wants to know what she's thinking, but he doesn't want to ask and to make her feel all pressured or whatever.
The next morning, though, she comes over to him in the hall, and he can't help but ask. She didn't say anything about the offer the entire ride over to her house yesterday, and when they texted a little after dinner she only talked about the physics homework, her aunt, and Dancing with the Stars. "So, do you think you're gonna be a Cheerio?" he asks.
"Brittany says I would be easy to lift to the top of a pyramid," Rachel answers. But that isn't really an answer. Is it? Is that a yes? Or - "Of course," she goes on, "Mr. Schue says I don't have to do anything I don't want to do." She pauses and gazes up at him. "What do you think?"
"It's not really up to me," he tells her quietly. He does have an opinion, but he can't, like, make her do whatever he wants. He knows what that feels like, when the person who's supposed to like you more than anyone else tries to dictate your life, as if you aren't good enough otherwise. He isn't gonna do that to her.
"You would be even cooler if you were dating a Cheerio, instead of just a Glee loser," she says.
"Yeah, probably, but. . . ."
"But what?" she pushes.
"But I don't care about that," he admits. "And you're, like, better than that. You're better than them." He reaches out and tugs affectionately on her hair, because she always looks pretty, but he really likes when her hair is down and is all loose and stuff. She smiles, and he can tell he said something right, because she looks really pleased right now.
The warning bell for first period rings. "I'll see you at lunch," she says, and she turns to go. A moment later, she turns back around and hugs him, pulling him down so she can wrap her arms around his neck, like she does when she really means a hug. He knows his Rachel hugs, and he knows she feels all vulnerable if she wants this kind of hug.
"I love you," he tells her, and he feels her lips turn up against his neck.
She announces her decision at Glee practice. "I told Coach Sylvester that I did not want to be a Cheerio, but if she promised to leave the club alone, I would fill in on various occasions when necessary. She agreed." She smiles at all of them, and Finn tries not to grin too widely.
"You do realise that now she's totally gonna, like, push random Cheerios she doesn't really like down the stairs right before every big competition, right?" Santana asks.
Rachel frowns.
"Wait," Quinn cuts in, before anyone can respond, "are you really serious about this? If you were a Cheerio, you would finally have everything you wanted. Everyone would actually like you."
"If this school cannot admire me for my talent unless I wear a cheerleading uniform and conform to an ideal that goes against individuality and originality, then I do not want their admiration, and, in fact, they will all sorely regret how little attention they paid me when I am a famous Broadway star." She nods her head in affirmation, as if that settles the matter, and then marches over to take her seat by Finn.
Kurt claps, Tina nods in approval, and Finn takes her hand. She's so awesome it's unreal.
viii.
Rachel might be the most physically affectionate person in the whole world.
She doesn't like to make out in school or anything like that, but she always likes to hold his hand, and to sit close to him, and to touch him constantly, if only her hand on his knee or hooked around his elbow. And when they aren't at school, when they're alone at his house before his mom or Burt comes home from work, she never tries to restrain herself.
He loves that. He loves how she puts so much of herself into every kiss, whether a kiss that builds in this slow, burning way, or a kiss that starts and stays playful as she nips at his lips and giggles against his throat, or a kiss that is so much all at once, that is hot and fast and desperate. Really, he knows all about kissing Rachel.
It's like this: they never really go beyond kisses for months when they first date.
He lives on kisses for a long time, basically.
The first time she lets him touch her boobs, she doesn't even really let him touch them. She grows more comfortable as weeks pass, though, and she finally lets him tug off her shirt and then she undoes her bra, and she flushes bright pink, biting her lip nervously and staring at him as he stares at her. He loves everything about Rachel, really, he does, but he thinks he falls even further for her the first time he sees her boobs.
She has awesome boobs, and they fit perfectly in his hands, and they taste really good, too, and she makes all the best noises when he touches them. And after that first time she finally really lets him see and touch and kiss her awesome boobs, she gives him, like, free reign to slip his hands up her shirt whenever he wants. Of course, he thinks when they reunite at Nationals that he'll have to earn back her trust, will have to start from scratch and once more work his way beyond kisses.
But he doesn't.
She explains to him in the summer that she isn't ready for more, though, not for a while yet, not because she doesn't love him or doesn't trust him, but simply because she isn't ready. "I don't think people should wait on principle," she tells him. "I simply people should wait until they - they just feel ready. And maybe that seems silly, but -" He tells her no, that isn't silly. If she wants to wait, he can respect that. They set up camp at second base, and he can't wait for more, but he can, because she does love him, and she does trust him, and that's really what matters.
She even starts to help him get off as summer ends and senior year begins. She grinds against him and only smiles in this completely sexy way when he comes in his pants, like she meant to do exactly that, and she slips her hand under his boxers one day and he holds his hand over hers and shows her what to do. In other words, Rachel is the greatest girlfriend in the world.
And when she leans against him in the hall as they talk with Mike and Sam, or when she rests her hand on his knee as they eat lunch with Mercedes, Kurt, and Tina, or when she walks down the hall with her hand in his, he feels so fucking proud that this girl is his girl.
ix.
They start to talk about colleges really early - like, by the middle of October.
All the seniors having meetings with Ms. Pillsbury. His meeting with her is about five minutes long and not really helpful, but, come on, when has that woman ever really helped anyone?
Most people in Glee are excited about applications and everything, probably because most people in Glee want to get out of this place so bad. Tina talks about how she wants to go to the school furthest from Ohio that she can find. Artie says he has to get into MIT if it kills him. Lauren brags about all the offers for wrestling scholarships she has.
Rachel proudly shows the Glee club her three binders of information on and applications for the best music schools across the country, in case they would like to have a model for how to prepare for the application process. Finn knows that Rachel will help with his applications, but he doesn't want to bring the subject up, and he doesn't want her to, either, because, honestly, the whole idea scares him a lot.
And when he looks around the choir room, he really only sees one other person who isn't thrilled about the idea of leaving McKinley: Quinn. She meets his gaze and they stare at each other for a minute. But he knows how that story goes. That can't be his life, not now that he knows another story exists. He turns away from her, and he smiles at Rachel, and he writes on the edge of her Glee paper that her binders of college stuff are really cool.
He'll avoid everything as long as he can, but when he can't anymore, Rachel will help him.
x.
"Who's writing the original songs this time?" Mercedes asks.
"Oh, my God, do we have to do original songs at every competition now?" Santana says.
"I would be more than happy to provide the club with another original piece," Rachel volunteers.
"I like them," Tina says. "They give us an edge."
"I want to write one," Brittany says.
"Me, too," Artie says. "I didn't even get to try last time."
"Rachel should write one," Finn says. "She totally blew everybody away at Regionals last year."
"Yeah, she also blows you."
"First, that is entirely inappropriate. Second, writing a song clearly takes immense talent, and you all should take advantage of my -"
"Guys," Mr. Schue tries.
"My song would be inspired by my musical hero, Rihanna. I don't like Ke$ha anymore, if you haven't been keeping up with Fondue for Two. It's an online sensation, by the way."
"What do you have to write about, Stubbles? All you and the BFG do is hold hands, dance around the piano, and skip through meadows together."
"Why don't we write another group number?" Sam suggests.
"Finn and I have an emotional depth that only music can truly express, and if we were to write a song together, combing the talent we demonstrated individually last year, then -"
"I agree with Sam," Mercedes says.
"If you all would listen to me for one minute -"
"Why doesn't everybody write one original song over the weekend and next Monday we can all vote, and the only rule is that you can't vote for yourself? And maybe we can have some way to make who wrote which lyrics anonymous, so it isn't a big popularity contest."
The entire room goes silent, and everyone stares at the boy who spoke. Finn can't remember his name. He feels bad. Is it Jason, maybe? Or Jake? Or John? Rachel frowns at the boy, like she isn't she what to make of him, and Mercedes looks confused, too, and Sam and Mike glance at each other, all weirded out, and -
"Be quiet, New Kid number three," Santana snaps, "nobody asked you."
Everybody starts to bicker again.
xi.
He finds Rachel in the stands at the start of the game.
She sits with his mom, Burt, and Kurt, and she jumps up and down and waves wildly. He waves back at her, and he grins, because he thinks she might be his biggest fan. She even has a sign that says so. They don't win the game, because McKinley still isn't that great at football, even if by some random fluke they wound up at the conference championship last year.
But he does score a touchdown, and he looks out at the stands, finds Rachel, and points at her.
Everybody else is pretty down after the game, 'cause, you know, they lost, but she meets him at the edge of the field, and she has on her old Team Finn shirt. He didn't know she even kept that, but he grins and kisses her, and she doesn't even break away from him when the rest of the team passes them by and shouts catcalls. "You were amazing," she tells him earnestly, and she hugs him and leans her head against her chest as she waves at Puck, Mike, and Sam.
"We lost, babe," he reminds her.
"You were still amazing," she proclaims.
He kisses her again.
xii.
They have a scary movie marathon.
Sam and Mercedes both go totally crazy, shouting at the screen and screaming and jumping up and down and stuff, even as they share random facts about other scary movies during the not scary scenes. They're, like, scary movie buffs or something. Finn likes a good horror movie, sure, but his favourite part of these is the way Rachel is, like, half-hiding behind, half-wrapped around him, and she lets out all these little squeals and holds onto him for dear life.
And, okay, he knows it's totally a cliché that his girlfriend is all over him during scary movies, but he doesn't really care. He likes that he gets to run his hand up and down her back and tell everything will be okay and be the strong, protective dude taking care of his girl. And, hey, Artie gives him a big thumbs up at one point, so he totally understands.
Rachel really starts to freak out during Dawn of the Dead, though, and she trembles and holds his hand so tightly he thinks he might lose circulation. He starts to worry. She doesn't have to watch this. They're all at her house, so she and he can totally go upstairs and listen to music in her room or something. He murmurs that to her, and she only shakes her head and presses her face into his arm. He thinks maybe she doesn't want to be lame or something.
He tries to think of a way to make her feel better.
"You want me to go get Henrietta?" he asks.
"No," she whispers, "don't leave me."
He cuddles her a little closer, and he starts to warn her when something really bad is about to happen. After the movie is finally over, Sam says they're gonna watch The Thing next, and Rachel shouts absolutely not, and this is her house, and next they will watch Singing in the Rain because she, personally, is scared at the terrifying idea that members of a Glee club bound to win Nationals haven't seen one of the greatest musical films of all time.
Nobody tries to argue with her, and she puts Singing in the Rain on. She, Kurt, and Mercedes sing along to every song. When the movie finally finishes, Rachel claps, and Puck declares that this was the lamest ending to a scary movie marathon in history.
Rachel sticks her tongue out at him.
part 2. part 3.
Fandom: Glee
Rating: M
Pairing/Characters: Rachel/Finn, ensemble
Setting/Spoilers: general spoils, but nothing specific--it's a near!future!fic
Warnings: sexual situations, language
Summary: senior year at McKinley.
A/N: Title and lyrics come from "Singing in My Sleep" by Semisonic.
All alone on the overpass,
Wired and phoned to a heart of glass.
Now I'm falling in love too fast
With you or the songs you chose.
And all the stars play for me.
Say the promise you long to keep,
I can hear you singing to me in my sleep.
i.
He catches her before she can leave the airport with her dads.
"We're together again now, right?" he asks, because he has to be sure.
She smiles. "We're together again now," she says.
His insides go soft, and he reaches out and touches her arm, because he can, because they might not have won nationals, but they've won each other back, and he can't really be bothered to care about anything else. "I promise I won't break up with you again," he tells her. He won't. He'll talk to her, and they'll work through their problems, and -
"Don't promise me that," Rachel says. "You can't know if you'll keep that promise."
He frowns.
"Promise me that we're going to try this time, really try," she says. "Promise me that we're not going to lie to each other. That we're always going to say what we really think and what we really feel. Promise me that we won't ever pretend anymore." She smiles again, and his heart beats a little faster.
"I can promise that," he says, and the words almost sick in his throat, because that one word means so much now, and he doesn't think he's ever felt this much of anything for anyone in his whole life. "No more pretending," he tells her.
He can definitely promise that.
ii.
Rachel falls asleep in the middle of Fight Club.
He carries her upstairs after the movie ends, and as much as he wants to take her to his room, he knows he can't. His mom is cool, but she isn't that cool. Kurt and Mercedes are still both down in the basement, and he knows that they've already wrestled control of the DVD player from Puck, and they're probably about to make everyone sit through something like The Devil Wears Prada. It's the Saturday before school starts again, and this is the last real night of summer.
Rachel blinks at him sleepily when he tugs the sheets up over her. He smiles, tells her to go back to sleep, and then looks around for her pink tote bag. She tugs on his arm and mutters something, but he goes over to her bag, and he finds Henrietta, and he hands the purple stuffed hippo to her, because, yeah, his girlfriend can't sleep without her stuffed hippo.
(She sleeps with an entire fleet of animals at her house, like Maurice and Maureen the stuffed monkeys, and Lisa the lamb, but her favourite will always be Henrietta. She told him so when she introduced him to all of her stuffed animals.)
He kisses her softly as she curls up, clutching Henrietta, and then he starts to leave. She stops him, though. "Aren't you going to snuggle with me?" she asks, her voice thick and quiet, and she sounds like a little kid.
Rachel loves to snuggle. He kinda likes that about her - and he thinks he can pass on The Devil Wears Prada. He lies back on the bed, and Rachel immediately takes a hold of his hand and then wraps his arm securely around her, even as she slips her tiny feet between his legs, her toes cold against his calves. "You're always so warm," she murmurs sleepily.
They've spent a lot of the summer like this.
They passed nearly every hot, sticky day watching movies in the Hummel basement with the entire Glee club, and swimming lazily at the lake, and falling asleep to the sound of bad summer television. He even taught her how to drive a lawnmower and how to play basketball. Plus, this summer they've, like, relearned each other.
This summer kinda rocked, basically. But summer is over, and he hates that.
Still, he knows this last year at McKinley is gonna be the best one yet.
iii.
He gives Rachel a ride to school on their first day.
She hands him zucchini bread the moment she climbs up into his truck, because she says he has to start today of all days off well, and she knows he doesn't eat a healthy breakfast. They've had this argument before, but she will never believe that Fruit Loops are a great breakfast food. He isn't gonna complain, though, if that means she'll make him banana bread and blueberry muffins and zucchini bread, which is really good, especially since zucchini is a vegetable, and who knew it could be all cake-like?
He holds her hand as they walk through the halls, and he remembers how totally awesome that was last year, and he pounds fists with a bunch of people, and everything is cool. He always kinda liked the first day of school, even if tomorrow the teachers will suddenly give them homework and stupid stuff like that. Plus, in his first class he munches on more zucchini bread that Rachel told him to save for lunch - it totally makes the class less boring.
Right before he turns towards the cafeteria to meet Rachel for lunch, he spies her still at her locker, decorating the inside, and he sees her put up a framed picture of him. She adjusts the magnetic frame to be perfectly in the center of the locker, surrounded by her star stickers, her puffy pink letters, and her newest to-do list. He goes to his own locker, and he tapes up his schedule, and he grins to himself as he tapes up a picture of them from Nationals.
It's totally lame, he knows, and it's only a matter of time before Puck asks him if it hurt when Finn chopped off his balls to hand them over to Rachel, but he can't help himself. He wants Rachel to know he's as proud to be her boyfriend as she is to be his girlfriend, because he doesn't think she always realises that.
And, for the record, when she sees the picture in his locker right after sixth period, she kisses him in the middle of the hall, like a real kiss with her hands on his shoulders and her tongue in his mouth, until people catcall and Mr. Schue coughs awkwardly. Finn feels like the man.
After school, she, Tina, and Mercedes wait on the bleachers, gossiping or doing whatever girls in groups do, while Finn, Mike, and Sam have football practice, and then they all go out on this triple date to Breadstix to celebrate the first day of senior year.
It's a pretty good first day.
iv.
They talk a lot more now.
He tells her about his early arrival problem, and the mailman, and that very fist kiss they had. She asks why he didn't tell her in all the months they dated, and he admits that he didn't want to look lame. She shakes her head at his confession, and she assures him she finds his overwhelming attraction to her flattering. She even rewards his honesty with kisses all over his face.
She talks about her insecurities, about how she spent so many years absolutely positive that her only real redeeming quality was her talent. She speaks softly, and he listens and rubs her back and tries not to feel like a dick when she talks about how often she used to compare herself to Quinn, and how sometimes she still has to stop herself from doing that.
After she finishes, he tells her that he really did mean what he told her long ago - there are so many great things about her beyond her voice, like how smart she is, and how pretty she is, and how nice she is, and how she always forgives people and tries to see the best in everyone.
They've always talked, but these talks are different. They always end up moving closer to each other as they talk, her sitting in his lap as they eat ice cream in the back of his truck, or lying together on the bed, listening to songs on her ipod, or watching movies in the basement with her head resting on his thigh and his hand running through her hair.
And he realises that she isn't simply the person he loves most. She's also the person he trusts most. He really hasn't ever trusted anybody the way he trusts her. It's kind of terrifying. He tells her that, though, and she smiles and links their hands, leaning against his shoulder as the movie starts.
He's always known Rachel likes to talk.
But now he knows that he kinda likes to talk, too.
v.
They have four new kids in Glee.
It's pretty cool. It's weird, too, though, because he feels like after the last two years, after everything they'll all been through together, they're a kind of family. It took a long, long time to become that way, but that's what they are. By this point, no one in the club really hates anyone else. They all snipe at each other like family, but they all stick up for each other like family, too, at least against people who aren't in Glee club. And these new kids are, like, outsiders.
But Rachel bakes cookies for them and she offers to help each of them with what she considers to be their greatest musical weakness. He honestly thinks, and not for the first time, that she might be the nicest person he knows. Who else would do all that for some freshmen and sophomores she doesn't even know? She tells Finn that they need to make the new students feel welcome. "We want New Directions to live on after we leave," she says.
That seems even weirder than the simple idea of new kids joining their group - he can't really fathom that in a year the Glee club will be an entirely different group. And, plus, come on, what kind of Glee club is New Directions without Rachel? He mentions that to her, and she says that the club can only hope someone with her talent, and someone with his talent, and hopefully also a pairing with their immense chemistry, will come along to save the club.
"And, until then, we will make the most of our final year," she says.
vi.
Bullying still happens. A lot. And that kinda sucks, and Finn wishes he could say that something might actually change at this school to stop that for everyone. He doesn't know if that will ever happen, though.
But everyone in Glee apparently now has this, like, secret pact. Like, when some hockey player starts to toss a slushee at Tina, Quinn screams bloody murder so loudly half the teachers in the building rush over, and the dumbass puckhead loses his guts. He dumps the slushee in the trash. And two days later when a cheerleader trips Rachel, Santana takes the redhead by the hair and throws her to the ground, screaming at her in Spanish.
She then tells Sue, who breaks up the fight, that she isn't about to let some puta mess with one of her girls, and Sue better keep her Cheerios in check. Sue wants Santana - and Quinn and Brittany, too - back on the squad, so she only mutters something under her breath and storms off without a word. And then Rachel wipes at tears of happiness over her newest friendship, and she hugs Santana, who pats her back awkwardly and looks around for someone to make Rachel get off her.
Finn only grins, sends Santana a big thumbs-up, and goes to class.
And then Rachel comes to the rescue when Azimio starts messing with Kurt again. Ever since everything happened with Karofsky, Azimio has been on this tear against Kurt, and on a random Thursday he pushes Kurt against the lockers really hard, and Kurt's books spill all over the floor, and everybody just stares. Finn sees red, and he slams his locker shut and starts towards them, ready to give Azimio a beating.
But before he has the chance, Rachel flies out of nowhere and starts to beat Azimio with her book, like literally smacking any part of him she can reach with some textbook, backing him into a corner and telling him to leave Kurt alone and to bully someone his own size. "Aren't you going to fight back?" she says. "Huh? Huh? What? You can egg me, you can throw slushees at me, you can call me names, you can shove my best friend against a locker, but you won't -"
Finn pulls Rachel away, and she kicks her legs wildly in the air, but he holds tight until she finally gives up as Mr. Schue, Coach Bieste, and a couple other teaches arrive at the scene.
And she always said violence is never the answer. Apparently, even Rachel Berry has a limit.
Rachel, Azimio, and Kurt all have to go to the office. Finn hopes Azimio fries and Rachel and Kurt get off scotch free. Of course, Azimio doesn't really get in any trouble, because bullies in this school never do, but Rachel and Kurt aren't in trouble either. Kurt links arms with Rachel as they strut through the halls together the rest of the day, and Finn thinks they might be his two most favourite people in the world.
A week later, Sam and Mike get in a fight with some guys that try to mess with Artie, and then Lauren backs this one Cheerio who calls Brittany a slut up against the lockers and stares so long and scary-like that the Cheerio bursts into tears.
By October the message is finally respected: the Glee kids might be losers, but nobody messes with them.
vii.
Senior year really takes a turn for the crazy when Quinn, Brittany, and Santana tell Sue they will return to the Cheerios if Sue promises not to mess with the Glee club even a little this year. Sue says yes, but she has one more condition, and when she announces this in front of the entire Glee club, they're all stunned.
She wants Rachel to join the Cheerios too.
"Are you joking?" Quinn asks, because someone has to say something after that bombshell.
"I don't joke about my Cheerios, Q," Sue replies. "I know talent when I see it. What do you say, Berry? You can be the heroine of your precious Glee club, and you can have a free ride to the top of the social ladder and be among the best and most elite at this school."
Rachel only stares, opening and closing her mouth for a minute, and then she glances at Finn.
"Why don't you give Rachel some time to think about your offer, Sue," Mr. Schue says. She agrees, glancing at Rachel one more time before she leaves the room. The rest of Glee practice is sort of awkward, and Rachel is quiet for a long time. Finn really wants to know what she's thinking, but he doesn't want to ask and to make her feel all pressured or whatever.
The next morning, though, she comes over to him in the hall, and he can't help but ask. She didn't say anything about the offer the entire ride over to her house yesterday, and when they texted a little after dinner she only talked about the physics homework, her aunt, and Dancing with the Stars. "So, do you think you're gonna be a Cheerio?" he asks.
"Brittany says I would be easy to lift to the top of a pyramid," Rachel answers. But that isn't really an answer. Is it? Is that a yes? Or - "Of course," she goes on, "Mr. Schue says I don't have to do anything I don't want to do." She pauses and gazes up at him. "What do you think?"
"It's not really up to me," he tells her quietly. He does have an opinion, but he can't, like, make her do whatever he wants. He knows what that feels like, when the person who's supposed to like you more than anyone else tries to dictate your life, as if you aren't good enough otherwise. He isn't gonna do that to her.
"You would be even cooler if you were dating a Cheerio, instead of just a Glee loser," she says.
"Yeah, probably, but. . . ."
"But what?" she pushes.
"But I don't care about that," he admits. "And you're, like, better than that. You're better than them." He reaches out and tugs affectionately on her hair, because she always looks pretty, but he really likes when her hair is down and is all loose and stuff. She smiles, and he can tell he said something right, because she looks really pleased right now.
The warning bell for first period rings. "I'll see you at lunch," she says, and she turns to go. A moment later, she turns back around and hugs him, pulling him down so she can wrap her arms around his neck, like she does when she really means a hug. He knows his Rachel hugs, and he knows she feels all vulnerable if she wants this kind of hug.
"I love you," he tells her, and he feels her lips turn up against his neck.
She announces her decision at Glee practice. "I told Coach Sylvester that I did not want to be a Cheerio, but if she promised to leave the club alone, I would fill in on various occasions when necessary. She agreed." She smiles at all of them, and Finn tries not to grin too widely.
"You do realise that now she's totally gonna, like, push random Cheerios she doesn't really like down the stairs right before every big competition, right?" Santana asks.
Rachel frowns.
"Wait," Quinn cuts in, before anyone can respond, "are you really serious about this? If you were a Cheerio, you would finally have everything you wanted. Everyone would actually like you."
"If this school cannot admire me for my talent unless I wear a cheerleading uniform and conform to an ideal that goes against individuality and originality, then I do not want their admiration, and, in fact, they will all sorely regret how little attention they paid me when I am a famous Broadway star." She nods her head in affirmation, as if that settles the matter, and then marches over to take her seat by Finn.
Kurt claps, Tina nods in approval, and Finn takes her hand. She's so awesome it's unreal.
viii.
Rachel might be the most physically affectionate person in the whole world.
She doesn't like to make out in school or anything like that, but she always likes to hold his hand, and to sit close to him, and to touch him constantly, if only her hand on his knee or hooked around his elbow. And when they aren't at school, when they're alone at his house before his mom or Burt comes home from work, she never tries to restrain herself.
He loves that. He loves how she puts so much of herself into every kiss, whether a kiss that builds in this slow, burning way, or a kiss that starts and stays playful as she nips at his lips and giggles against his throat, or a kiss that is so much all at once, that is hot and fast and desperate. Really, he knows all about kissing Rachel.
It's like this: they never really go beyond kisses for months when they first date.
He lives on kisses for a long time, basically.
The first time she lets him touch her boobs, she doesn't even really let him touch them. She grows more comfortable as weeks pass, though, and she finally lets him tug off her shirt and then she undoes her bra, and she flushes bright pink, biting her lip nervously and staring at him as he stares at her. He loves everything about Rachel, really, he does, but he thinks he falls even further for her the first time he sees her boobs.
She has awesome boobs, and they fit perfectly in his hands, and they taste really good, too, and she makes all the best noises when he touches them. And after that first time she finally really lets him see and touch and kiss her awesome boobs, she gives him, like, free reign to slip his hands up her shirt whenever he wants. Of course, he thinks when they reunite at Nationals that he'll have to earn back her trust, will have to start from scratch and once more work his way beyond kisses.
But he doesn't.
She explains to him in the summer that she isn't ready for more, though, not for a while yet, not because she doesn't love him or doesn't trust him, but simply because she isn't ready. "I don't think people should wait on principle," she tells him. "I simply people should wait until they - they just feel ready. And maybe that seems silly, but -" He tells her no, that isn't silly. If she wants to wait, he can respect that. They set up camp at second base, and he can't wait for more, but he can, because she does love him, and she does trust him, and that's really what matters.
She even starts to help him get off as summer ends and senior year begins. She grinds against him and only smiles in this completely sexy way when he comes in his pants, like she meant to do exactly that, and she slips her hand under his boxers one day and he holds his hand over hers and shows her what to do. In other words, Rachel is the greatest girlfriend in the world.
And when she leans against him in the hall as they talk with Mike and Sam, or when she rests her hand on his knee as they eat lunch with Mercedes, Kurt, and Tina, or when she walks down the hall with her hand in his, he feels so fucking proud that this girl is his girl.
ix.
They start to talk about colleges really early - like, by the middle of October.
All the seniors having meetings with Ms. Pillsbury. His meeting with her is about five minutes long and not really helpful, but, come on, when has that woman ever really helped anyone?
Most people in Glee are excited about applications and everything, probably because most people in Glee want to get out of this place so bad. Tina talks about how she wants to go to the school furthest from Ohio that she can find. Artie says he has to get into MIT if it kills him. Lauren brags about all the offers for wrestling scholarships she has.
Rachel proudly shows the Glee club her three binders of information on and applications for the best music schools across the country, in case they would like to have a model for how to prepare for the application process. Finn knows that Rachel will help with his applications, but he doesn't want to bring the subject up, and he doesn't want her to, either, because, honestly, the whole idea scares him a lot.
And when he looks around the choir room, he really only sees one other person who isn't thrilled about the idea of leaving McKinley: Quinn. She meets his gaze and they stare at each other for a minute. But he knows how that story goes. That can't be his life, not now that he knows another story exists. He turns away from her, and he smiles at Rachel, and he writes on the edge of her Glee paper that her binders of college stuff are really cool.
He'll avoid everything as long as he can, but when he can't anymore, Rachel will help him.
x.
"Who's writing the original songs this time?" Mercedes asks.
"Oh, my God, do we have to do original songs at every competition now?" Santana says.
"I would be more than happy to provide the club with another original piece," Rachel volunteers.
"I like them," Tina says. "They give us an edge."
"I want to write one," Brittany says.
"Me, too," Artie says. "I didn't even get to try last time."
"Rachel should write one," Finn says. "She totally blew everybody away at Regionals last year."
"Yeah, she also blows you."
"First, that is entirely inappropriate. Second, writing a song clearly takes immense talent, and you all should take advantage of my -"
"Guys," Mr. Schue tries.
"My song would be inspired by my musical hero, Rihanna. I don't like Ke$ha anymore, if you haven't been keeping up with Fondue for Two. It's an online sensation, by the way."
"What do you have to write about, Stubbles? All you and the BFG do is hold hands, dance around the piano, and skip through meadows together."
"Why don't we write another group number?" Sam suggests.
"Finn and I have an emotional depth that only music can truly express, and if we were to write a song together, combing the talent we demonstrated individually last year, then -"
"I agree with Sam," Mercedes says.
"If you all would listen to me for one minute -"
"Why doesn't everybody write one original song over the weekend and next Monday we can all vote, and the only rule is that you can't vote for yourself? And maybe we can have some way to make who wrote which lyrics anonymous, so it isn't a big popularity contest."
The entire room goes silent, and everyone stares at the boy who spoke. Finn can't remember his name. He feels bad. Is it Jason, maybe? Or Jake? Or John? Rachel frowns at the boy, like she isn't she what to make of him, and Mercedes looks confused, too, and Sam and Mike glance at each other, all weirded out, and -
"Be quiet, New Kid number three," Santana snaps, "nobody asked you."
Everybody starts to bicker again.
xi.
He finds Rachel in the stands at the start of the game.
She sits with his mom, Burt, and Kurt, and she jumps up and down and waves wildly. He waves back at her, and he grins, because he thinks she might be his biggest fan. She even has a sign that says so. They don't win the game, because McKinley still isn't that great at football, even if by some random fluke they wound up at the conference championship last year.
But he does score a touchdown, and he looks out at the stands, finds Rachel, and points at her.
Everybody else is pretty down after the game, 'cause, you know, they lost, but she meets him at the edge of the field, and she has on her old Team Finn shirt. He didn't know she even kept that, but he grins and kisses her, and she doesn't even break away from him when the rest of the team passes them by and shouts catcalls. "You were amazing," she tells him earnestly, and she hugs him and leans her head against her chest as she waves at Puck, Mike, and Sam.
"We lost, babe," he reminds her.
"You were still amazing," she proclaims.
He kisses her again.
xii.
They have a scary movie marathon.
Sam and Mercedes both go totally crazy, shouting at the screen and screaming and jumping up and down and stuff, even as they share random facts about other scary movies during the not scary scenes. They're, like, scary movie buffs or something. Finn likes a good horror movie, sure, but his favourite part of these is the way Rachel is, like, half-hiding behind, half-wrapped around him, and she lets out all these little squeals and holds onto him for dear life.
And, okay, he knows it's totally a cliché that his girlfriend is all over him during scary movies, but he doesn't really care. He likes that he gets to run his hand up and down her back and tell everything will be okay and be the strong, protective dude taking care of his girl. And, hey, Artie gives him a big thumbs up at one point, so he totally understands.
Rachel really starts to freak out during Dawn of the Dead, though, and she trembles and holds his hand so tightly he thinks he might lose circulation. He starts to worry. She doesn't have to watch this. They're all at her house, so she and he can totally go upstairs and listen to music in her room or something. He murmurs that to her, and she only shakes her head and presses her face into his arm. He thinks maybe she doesn't want to be lame or something.
He tries to think of a way to make her feel better.
"You want me to go get Henrietta?" he asks.
"No," she whispers, "don't leave me."
He cuddles her a little closer, and he starts to warn her when something really bad is about to happen. After the movie is finally over, Sam says they're gonna watch The Thing next, and Rachel shouts absolutely not, and this is her house, and next they will watch Singing in the Rain because she, personally, is scared at the terrifying idea that members of a Glee club bound to win Nationals haven't seen one of the greatest musical films of all time.
Nobody tries to argue with her, and she puts Singing in the Rain on. She, Kurt, and Mercedes sing along to every song. When the movie finally finishes, Rachel claps, and Puck declares that this was the lamest ending to a scary movie marathon in history.
Rachel sticks her tongue out at him.
part 2. part 3.