I'm not vulnerable
So here I am updating at about 7 minutes away from being midnight. Where shall I start? I'm not sure.... Do I still like Billy? Maybe. What happened? Well.... I can say that he was either forced into by peer or himself. He asked out.. girl.. on piece of paper. Atleast that's what I heard, and I'm not surprised. When I first heard when I got home, I had mixed emotions, I was bit sad, tearing, but then dried up quickly. Then later, I wasn't even a bit sad anymore. But I wasn't in the least bit happy for them.... yet? Or not.. Anyway, I just need to know if Billiam did it for the sake of his friends or because he likes her too? Or! MAINLY BECAUSE OF HER LONG ASS NOTE THAT SHE GAVE HIM ON WEDNESDAY, OR WHATEVER DAY THAT WAS.... BUT.. MAYBE I DON'T CARE ANYMORE ABOUT HIM? I'M NOT SURE.. i just want to go to school and punch him, but not too hard.. just so that it hurts him a bit the way he hurt me..well.. actually, he didn't really hurt me.. haha I'm not sure.. but anyway, I just want to punch him in the stomach and ask him why did he do this? how could he do this to me? what's wrong with him anyway, he acts normal around other people but silent and awkward around me. I just want to make a move! I want to have a mistletoe and have guidance to wherever he lives and ring the doorbell on Xmas and hopefully he'll be the one answering the door, and I'll put the mistletoe above our heads and I'll just smooch him right then and there and run away back home and then laugh about it. I don't care, I'll smooch him even though he's waiting for Kori's response which I know it's a 'yes' because obviously she's the one who likes him and just found her feminine side over the summer. Anyway, smooch him even when he's with somebody else... hmphh.. I just know that I'm not letting this affair ruin my Christmas.