wow
wow im such a loser. i like only use this thing to complain now. specifically about monika. i will admit there will be some of that in here. but how about a real update for once huh? huh? so. umm friday. i dont really rmemeber school woot work woot. ummmm. that night. i dont remember. wow some update. so saturday i woke up and i thot i was oging to take ashley to lunch with katy but idk. so me and max drove around. then we ppicked up ashle yand went to eat it was fun. ashley leedburg to be specific. ya. so then umm i dropped max off at work and i monika was sposed to call to hang out. she called and sed she wnated to go to bedi didnt say anything except for ok goodnight! then i guess she got into a fight with angie. she claled me and asked if id take her shopping. she was pretty cool we tlaked and stuff. (warning i think this is going to turn out about a complaint about monika. nothign big that i need help or anything. but dont read if u dont wnat. im going to wright it cuz its my journal and i can write what i wnat but just to le u know. u dotn have to read) (just sayin) so yah she was cool and everything. umm i dont really remmeebr after that actually. oh ya we went and hugn out at amandas it was fun but she kind of ignored me a lot but at the end i forced her into letting me give her a massage then she was very.....kissy. i think. it was odd. perhaps i had turned her on. ya so i dropped her off at home and went to hang out with mercedes and linsey i had fun their aweosme. we picked up max at work and hung out at mercedes again then i dropped max off at home and i went home. woot. then sunday i went to locobazooka. once again monika was cool at the beginning but by the end its liek she didnt wnat me there. especially like at the very very end. she liek gets madat me for stupid shit and everyone else is awesome. it hurts. like i sed im 100% ok tho! promise! promise! promise! shes not my gf so w.e! its just annoying u know? and im complaining here cuz its my journal! so ya. disturbed fuckin rocked! and umm what was it. blind by noon was good. thewir was this band jaded. they werent that amazing. but let me tell u. they were fucking hott as shit. omg. omg. omg. omg. omg. like seriously. yup. so neways ummm ya. i brought everyone hoem and got home about 10:30. it was a good trip. today i went to school and monika was rude in them orning. didnt bother me. then i went to classes and stuff. boring. oh i have to say. i love psychology. its the best class dude. ms collins rocks so much. ummm yup. i htink i wnat to be a psychologist when i grow up. for al ogn time ive really helped people out in situations and stuff and i would love to do that growing up. yup. lately. i havent relaly been helping nayone. just askign for help. idk. monika really kinda puts me down. like i find other people telling me stuff and somehow i bring up monika. and thats like lal im concerned with. i really disrespect myself for it. i do realize my situation is fuckin nothing compared to other peoples. like maxs. so ya. idk im slowly getting over it. cuz after school. (heres where the real complaing comes in) u know drive people home same hting. but monika just relaly made me feel like shit and i got relaly depressed. we saw bryan walking down the street and she got pissed at me cuz i wasnt giving him a ride. its like omg i dint know. he was actually wlaking to the karate school. so ya i was liek wow i didnt even know. so i gave him a ride. and like ya we kinda started fighting cuz what happened is. i said to marc. it was just me her and marc. i sed marc she wouldnt even notice if it was me. then i laughed and sed she probably doesnt even know hwta i just sed. so i asked her and she sed idk somehtingabout walking. so we laughed. and she got mad. and i told ehr what i sed and she got mad and i tried to explain myself but she interupted then when i brought up a good point she just sed w.e . so i told her. i was like wow. u cna talk and interrupt but when i talk u dotn let me tlak u just say w.e or ya ok. i was like real fair. then i smiled and laughed at her like it was no big deal and i was playing around. i think she bought it cuz she laughed too. insde. it hurt. she treats me liek shit. and everyone else like they just gave her am illion bucks. it sux cuz she wasl iek this when we werent going out. and now that were not ive been u know staying away form her. liek in school., but this mornign even though i was away form ehr she still like got mad at me idk cuz i didnt say hi or sumthing. i was doign my homework for psychology which was to study someone. so its like wow u treat me liek shit when i dont give u space and act liek a mushy great bf AND when i treat u liek a friend and give u lots of space. so u know. i started getting really depressed. itsl ike god i like her so much. but im not blind. i cnat stand beign around her when she treatsme like this. it hurts too much. i feel so used and hated and insignifigant and ya. so i thoguth about it and i found a way to deal with it. which is why i sed im alright. i odnt really wnat to put it in here but u know. so im a ok. i really thot about it and now everyhtings better! so yah. im just updateing to put an update. sorry for complaing about monika but hey liek i sed i cna put w.e i wnat in here u dont have to read. but if u read this far then thanx! and everyones whose helped me so far. i love u. straight up. thanx! muah! im going to go play video games! bye :)