depression
If you ever really want to feel how fucked up my depressions get, I thought to myself today, with no irony or humor, "I should toss myself off a bridge. At least I'll save money on a haircut."
Those ideas don't even go together, but it made perfect sense to me at that moment.
I also thought, "Thank you for the gift of your smile. I'm going to kill myself now."
Again, what the hell is wrong with me?
It may be in part that today was not fun at the j.o.b. (not completely shitty, but not fun, as if it ever is) and I had all of a cookie and 2 cups of coffee to eat all day. We just ordered pizza. I'm off to shower off the hair from the cutting. And while may be worried about what I'm spending money on, the haircut was so worth it, as seeing Bethany and getting her to coax me out of my anger and stress made for a good time of talking and relaxation.
Those ideas don't even go together, but it made perfect sense to me at that moment.
I also thought, "Thank you for the gift of your smile. I'm going to kill myself now."
Again, what the hell is wrong with me?
It may be in part that today was not fun at the j.o.b. (not completely shitty, but not fun, as if it ever is) and I had all of a cookie and 2 cups of coffee to eat all day. We just ordered pizza. I'm off to shower off the hair from the cutting. And while may be worried about what I'm spending money on, the haircut was so worth it, as seeing Bethany and getting her to coax me out of my anger and stress made for a good time of talking and relaxation.