*sigh*
This weekend has been a heck of a weekend for me and my family. Im not gonna go into long details but I do have one thing to say. Never leave a place where a family member is being mad or in a argument with them without making it better.. Thats the worst feeling in the world to leave a place mad or angry with that person because you never know when its gonna be the last time you talk to that person or see them again. I know I cant blame myself but its hard not to.. Its hard to accept the fact that he is gone. Its hard to know that there will be no more going to the shop on work days to just sit there and shoot the shit with him. there will be no more calling and yelling and venting at or with him on my bad days. He always made me laugh on my bad days and always made me laugh harder on my good days.. Its gonna take time to accept it but how much time exactly.. Hes was like my brother from another mother and I was his little sister.. I just cant believe that hes gone.. I keep waiting for a phone call saying that hes doing fine and hes gonna be ok and hes at the house sittin in his chair watching tv and smoking a cig... But i wont. It doesnt seem real. I know we arent suppose to question why things happen but sometimes you cant help and ask why... I just wish I could take that day back and just make things all better.. It was the worst feeling in the world when we got that phone call Saturday night... My whole body went numb and i felt empty. I just broke down and couldnt help but blame myself.. I know your not suppose to but I cant help it.. I will be better itll take time.... Tori is doing well shes doing better than I thought she would do... I love her and I would do anything in the world for her... and she knows that.. no matter what it is I would do it for her.... and to add to my horrible weekend.. On the way home from Jessi's house I got a freakin flat tire.. GAH my luck keeps gettin worse and worse as the days and weeks go by..
RIP Bill Doyle July 9, 2005
Other than that nothing really has happend.. Today Cynth, Jsi, McLin and me all went to eat at Ruby Tuesdays and it was good we had an ADD waiter.. gah hes was like spazmatic we laughed at him the entire time we were there... After we ate we went to the park walked around the park and took pictures.. After that we went to Sonic and we saw alot of people up there so we sat and talked for them for a while. After that we went to Daniel and Lee's we sat there and talked. Then we took Cynth home and me and jessi came back to my house. She went up town to get some subway but they were closed... WTF.. when I worked there we didnt close until 2:00 a.m and it is only 1:47 a.m. something is wrong with that picture.. So she called and asked if I wanted anything from the gas station and she went and got somethings from the gas station.. it was crazy.. so me and her are just sittin here watching tv and chillin.. thats about it
Cynth, Mac, Daniel, Lee~ thank yawl so much for everything yawl have done for me and my family. yawl are to awesome.. yawl are my true friends and yawl have helped me so much.. thanks for everything I appreciate it a lot..
Jsi~ gah you are my sister.. You are always there for me to laugh with cry with and be stupid with and I would not change that for anything in the world. You always make me laugh no matter what kinda day I am having.. I LOVE YOU
Thats it for now..
Love yawl