I Did Tell You

[monkey_matt]

I did tell you...

...that embryonic snakes
have four tiny limbs,
overgrown with tiny scales.
That humpback whales are
covered in lumps
because they’re allergic to seawater.
Eric Idle Died.
Golden Retrievers and
Labradors
are basically
two of a kind.
I can’t even see that spot on your chin,
and even
if
I could
it wouldn’t
look that bad.

I also said that
one hundred and eleven
million,
one hundred and eleven
thousand,
one hundred and eleven
squared
is…
12,345,678,987,654,321.
I was going to tidy that up in a minute.

Your bum does not stick out.

I also said Barbie
was a Nazi invention,
that banana plants could walk,
and if you ate too many carrots,
your skin would turn orange.

I told you how stunning
you look in that top.

…so why,
when I say I love you,
am I surprised that you don’t believe me?

_