I'm Feeling Nostalgic
Lots have changed for me just in the past four weeks. I have gotten married, said goodbye for friends and new friendships that mean the world to me even though they live in Ohio, moved back to Chicago, moved in with my husband, started house and try to get settled.
There are changes around me, as I am in the process of changing my name, drivers license, new neighborhoods and environments. I used to think my bed was huge - a full size bed. Put in a full grown man into the mix it obviously changes, especially when he likes to steal the covers.
I was unpacking the bedroom today and tonight trying to get it finally finished when I ran across pictures. I stopped and looked. I've seen pictures of my growing up, trips I've gone on, family members that have passed, my nieces and nephews growing up, and high school friends.
I came across a little photo booklet that I put all of the senior pictures I received from friends and classmates with whom I graduated. I took them all out one by one and read the backs of them. It surprises me how we could have been so naive at that age. Here we are 17 - 19 years old in a small town in Ohio. We say we plan on keeping in touch since the friendships we have mean so much. We say we'll never forget the memories that we have or joked upon. We didn't know that there was such a bigger world and what the real world was actually like. I had a close net of friends that I sat with at lunch - I love those girls, and ironically I only keep in touch with three out of the six. Friends from band I haven't kept in touch with, but I have with my Flagettes, well some. My crushes - oh my crushes - I know what some of them have been up to. Whether by having them as friends on myspace or facebook. Looking at the senior pics or thinking of who I was crushing on for YEARS cracks me up. First through 6th grade was the same person and 7th - 12th was the same but different person. I crushed on a few different ones senior year, but one hard that I had been for years. The guys had to have known - if they didn't or still don't, I must have been more shy and quiet than I thought I was.
I sit here in my new apartment taking a break from unpacking while waiting on my husband to get home from work. I miss those girls I had lunch with, I miss my friendships from Ohio, I miss the friends that I had at college, that I lost having to move back to Ohio. However I know I am at the best place right now. I never thought life would be this good. I never thought it would be me walking down that aisle to get married, but here I am sitting on my couch with an engagement ring and wedding band on my finger waiting on my husband (oh my gosh - my husband) to get home.
Obviously things change like we do with the time, but do we honestly think life would ever be the same as it was in high school? There were times I wish it did because of all the crap I have had to deal with, but I don't want to now because knowing all the happiness I feel at present.
I'm trying to be strong and figure out how I am going to get through the holidays without the friendships and family I treasure so much. Don't get me wrong, I love Mike's family, but there is nothing like your own - your twisted, crazy own.
There are changes around me, as I am in the process of changing my name, drivers license, new neighborhoods and environments. I used to think my bed was huge - a full size bed. Put in a full grown man into the mix it obviously changes, especially when he likes to steal the covers.
I was unpacking the bedroom today and tonight trying to get it finally finished when I ran across pictures. I stopped and looked. I've seen pictures of my growing up, trips I've gone on, family members that have passed, my nieces and nephews growing up, and high school friends.
I came across a little photo booklet that I put all of the senior pictures I received from friends and classmates with whom I graduated. I took them all out one by one and read the backs of them. It surprises me how we could have been so naive at that age. Here we are 17 - 19 years old in a small town in Ohio. We say we plan on keeping in touch since the friendships we have mean so much. We say we'll never forget the memories that we have or joked upon. We didn't know that there was such a bigger world and what the real world was actually like. I had a close net of friends that I sat with at lunch - I love those girls, and ironically I only keep in touch with three out of the six. Friends from band I haven't kept in touch with, but I have with my Flagettes, well some. My crushes - oh my crushes - I know what some of them have been up to. Whether by having them as friends on myspace or facebook. Looking at the senior pics or thinking of who I was crushing on for YEARS cracks me up. First through 6th grade was the same person and 7th - 12th was the same but different person. I crushed on a few different ones senior year, but one hard that I had been for years. The guys had to have known - if they didn't or still don't, I must have been more shy and quiet than I thought I was.
I sit here in my new apartment taking a break from unpacking while waiting on my husband to get home from work. I miss those girls I had lunch with, I miss my friendships from Ohio, I miss the friends that I had at college, that I lost having to move back to Ohio. However I know I am at the best place right now. I never thought life would be this good. I never thought it would be me walking down that aisle to get married, but here I am sitting on my couch with an engagement ring and wedding band on my finger waiting on my husband (oh my gosh - my husband) to get home.
Obviously things change like we do with the time, but do we honestly think life would ever be the same as it was in high school? There were times I wish it did because of all the crap I have had to deal with, but I don't want to now because knowing all the happiness I feel at present.
I'm trying to be strong and figure out how I am going to get through the holidays without the friendships and family I treasure so much. Don't get me wrong, I love Mike's family, but there is nothing like your own - your twisted, crazy own.