and her name was Nahyil
Tuesday mourning.
"For the little girl who is always dancing around my house.
Now you need to learn flamenco, nina.
Snap pop the sun, and spank the moon.
Midnights done when it hits high noon."
Wouldn't this all be easier if you just left me alone? forever. As in, don't write me a postcard from Spain, don't give me your belongings, don't call me casually, don't text me seductively, or compliment me. Don't smell my hair! Don't think of me after I have already left. Because I know that you do, asshole. I know you do. And don't think that you can do those aforementioned things, and not move me. I am not a nun. [yet]. And yes, I love to hear it--it satisfies my worldly desires. But nothing else. nothing. All you want is to keep me hanging on for just a minute longer than i intended..and you wonder...how much longer you can keep this all going, before i really do call it quits. Well, i wonder the same. I apologize for always making a scene. You wish i would silently accept, but i can't and i won't. I'll never fall for you the way i did before. But i'll come close. And you will smell my hair again. And tell me I look good. Well, i do look good. to you. But fuck you for telling me i do. And fuck me for trying to look good. for you. Just go to Peru. Just get someone pregnant, and have the beautiful biracial babies you so long for. Let me have my closure. Let me move the fuck on. Because i thought that i have but you are always holding onto the tail of my skirt as i drag you through the mud. And now you smell like old, wet socks. But i do love you, fucker. not in the "we will be together forever" sort of way. because we won't and thank god for that. i love you because you are insane and angry and in your face and charming and a talent and for letting me into your disaster. And i hate you for all the same reasons. You are not what i am looking for now or ever. But i will always get you. And that is something.
"For the little girl who is always dancing around my house.
Now you need to learn flamenco, nina.
Snap pop the sun, and spank the moon.
Midnights done when it hits high noon."
Wouldn't this all be easier if you just left me alone? forever. As in, don't write me a postcard from Spain, don't give me your belongings, don't call me casually, don't text me seductively, or compliment me. Don't smell my hair! Don't think of me after I have already left. Because I know that you do, asshole. I know you do. And don't think that you can do those aforementioned things, and not move me. I am not a nun. [yet]. And yes, I love to hear it--it satisfies my worldly desires. But nothing else. nothing. All you want is to keep me hanging on for just a minute longer than i intended..and you wonder...how much longer you can keep this all going, before i really do call it quits. Well, i wonder the same. I apologize for always making a scene. You wish i would silently accept, but i can't and i won't. I'll never fall for you the way i did before. But i'll come close. And you will smell my hair again. And tell me I look good. Well, i do look good. to you. But fuck you for telling me i do. And fuck me for trying to look good. for you. Just go to Peru. Just get someone pregnant, and have the beautiful biracial babies you so long for. Let me have my closure. Let me move the fuck on. Because i thought that i have but you are always holding onto the tail of my skirt as i drag you through the mud. And now you smell like old, wet socks. But i do love you, fucker. not in the "we will be together forever" sort of way. because we won't and thank god for that. i love you because you are insane and angry and in your face and charming and a talent and for letting me into your disaster. And i hate you for all the same reasons. You are not what i am looking for now or ever. But i will always get you. And that is something.