highlights=the ultimate discouraging parent of all time
yes i am drunk right now but someone did happen to bring up the title "highlights" tonite. and you know honestly it was my favorite childrens' subscription of all time. that is, until age 8.
remember the two full pages (color) of child readers' poems and drawings? these two pages are responsible for my lack of motivation in the world of art. at 8 FUCKING years of age i sent in the most awesome picture ever of kids chillin in a swimming pool. 8 YEARS OLD. even one diving off the goddamn board. complete with splashed. and guess what. within one motherfuckin month i received a letter from the goddamn highlights "team" if you can even call them such an unorganized noun.
this letter read something along the lines of "dear naive young ass bitch with your head in the wrong set of clouds, we got yr pic and its awesome!!!thx so much for sending that pile of bullfuck in! vBUT we have too manby other radical submissions. so peace. yours fo rillz, highlyghtz"
and honestly you know i would be able to deal BUT these mothers didn;t even have the balls to send me back my kewl illustration colored pencil shading and all.
i blame this lame ass publication for my discouragement throughout every single fucking art class i've taken since i was retarded enough to slap a stamp on the goddamn shit covered envelope only to find i was a worthless, denied mealworm.
in conclusion. fuck you highlights staff. i hope your young die at birth and their souls are lost and forgotten for eternity in your hidden pictures column. may you forever have the actions of goofus, and may gallant rape you anally and rough.
yours dubiously,
sheila