(no subject)
Today was an okay day. the girls in my gym class annoy the hell outta me! Their the kinda of girl that are giggly and are like OH MY GOD! They annoy me to no end. We played dodge ball and NO ONE on my team would pick up a damn ball and throw it! They cept screaming and yelling. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I wanted to hit them. So I said fuck it and picked up the balls and started throwing them at people. Usually I don't play cause I hate gym but there was no way I was gonna sit there and just watch. I started throwing the balls at my own team but Mrs. Jones told me no matter how annoying they are you gotta play right. She said on any other day though I can throw anything I want at them. It was great... I love her ha ha ha. My friends Ashley kept throwing the balls at this REALLY annoying chick Chelsea and kept hitting her in the face ha ha! She was screaming. Ha ha it made me laugh. She was like OMG why do they keep hitting me! It was fun. The rest of the day was okay. My dads mad at me..... I didn't call him yesterday and he got pissed. He says that he can go 2 or 3 weeks with out talking to me and then outta the blue I call just because I want something. Which is bullshit. It made me sad though. He made me cry. I love my dad more than ANYTHING in this world. Its not my fault I can't ever see him. he needs to talk to my mom about that. If I could I would change EVERYTHING for him. I miss him soo much. I told him I was really sorry and that I fell asleep before he woke up ( cause he works nights). He told me that can't ever change anything its like sayin 1000 Hail Marrys and it still doesn't change anything. He didn't even say I love you when we hug up. he just said he needed to get back to getting ready for work. Then he hung up. It makes me sad when hes mad at me. What he thinks means anything and everything to me. I can hear something from one person but untill I hear it from him it doesn't mean anything to me. Even my mom doesn't have the power over me. I whis he knew but whatever. He said some other things and it made me cry and he was like yeah it sucks to be me doesn't it. I was like well untill I get a car I can't change anything. And he said I could do anything I wanted to but I can't. He doesn't know how it is in my house hold. I wanna move in with him but my mom wont let me for some reason. She says I wouldn't have a good life and thatd Id be even more of a fuck up if I moved in with him. that makes me mad cause shes not only insulting me but she insulting my dad too. you just don't go there with me. I guess thats why me and my mom have such a fake relationship. I wish I remembered how it was before she left him. Thatd be great. I hear so many things but I only belive what my dad says I feel like my mom just trys to make him look bad and make her look good. But I know better. Shes done that all her life. It makes me sick to know some of the things I do about their relationship. My dad can't stand to talk to her. He said after I turn 18 he will NEVER talk to my mom again. He hates her more than anything! He says that he never knew hate till after she left. It makes me sad. But eh what can I do ya know.... I hate that she moved me 14 hours away from him for most of my life. Now Im only 4 hours away but it still seems like Im soo far away. But oh well this will soon all be over when I move out in 3 years! Its gonna be awsome! im gonna go live with him for a year till I figure out what I wanna do after high school. I can't wait!