exploding ian = goodness.

[moments_notice]

so matt and i were painting the bathroom upstairs today and we got into a discussion about how we operate/have been operating...it's at the point where i can think about this friendship again on a truthful level- because i've only recently gotten back in touch with myself

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[learning to revise, this is a new and improved comment]

[_onlysky_]

haha actors + sports = humour.

so this falling business is kind of interesting, you know martha graham was really good to me because she taught me how i can be compulsive and be safe, contracting and releasing, teaching me to breathe while i'm terrified and that i can control all of my falling and picking up. which is condusive to so much but not to now because now in class we literally stand until we fall, not diving head first into the floor, but hips, ribs[lungs.heart], head all at once and we catch ourselves on true impulse, often stumbling, often too scared to really fall and this may be why i love merle holloman so much because sometimes its just like that becoming soft in our cores and taking the chance, possibly falling and letting them hit the floor.

i mean thats where i'm at. and i think its these little reality bits that help me stay and go ....

i'm so glad to have you in,
so so glad to be gentle and honest and here and now and then and there and later with you.

i love you --

--yours.

p.s. thanks for the distraction. ;)