First, Before, Next, Then, Last
I think today there was a bit of a breakthrough for me and my boy.
After dinner, my husband gave him the assignment of sweeping out his room, something he has never done before.
It took him forever. He was distracted, frustrated, and he just couldn't finish.
After an hour, it still wasn't done. He's frustrated, I'm frustrated, Jason's at his limit. He's yelling at him to get it together and just sweep! The boy's crying, my husband's DONE with this.
I get an idea. I go in, hold him and get his attention.
He cries he doesn't know what to do. You see, on top of ADHD, he's got this thing called "Executive Order Dysfunction". So, the instructions you'd normally give someone just aren't enough.
After 2 or 3 bouts of comfort, we finally get to the point.
He didn't know how.
So, I said "okay. Then let's make a list. To help figure out what comes first."
Wrote down the instructions he had and realized there were steps missing. Yes, you sweep out the corner but FIRST, you have to move the furniture away and pick up items off the floor BEFORE sweeping. THEN, bringing all of the dust into one pile, etc. and so on.
By the time it was over, he was so excited that he'd figured it out and he could do it himself. No anxiety, no tears, and the place was actually clean.
I think we can build on this.
After dinner, my husband gave him the assignment of sweeping out his room, something he has never done before.
It took him forever. He was distracted, frustrated, and he just couldn't finish.
After an hour, it still wasn't done. He's frustrated, I'm frustrated, Jason's at his limit. He's yelling at him to get it together and just sweep! The boy's crying, my husband's DONE with this.
I get an idea. I go in, hold him and get his attention.
He cries he doesn't know what to do. You see, on top of ADHD, he's got this thing called "Executive Order Dysfunction". So, the instructions you'd normally give someone just aren't enough.
After 2 or 3 bouts of comfort, we finally get to the point.
He didn't know how.
So, I said "okay. Then let's make a list. To help figure out what comes first."
Wrote down the instructions he had and realized there were steps missing. Yes, you sweep out the corner but FIRST, you have to move the furniture away and pick up items off the floor BEFORE sweeping. THEN, bringing all of the dust into one pile, etc. and so on.
By the time it was over, he was so excited that he'd figured it out and he could do it himself. No anxiety, no tears, and the place was actually clean.
I think we can build on this.