GOULET!
Once there was an all-encompassing void. Then there began to be things created in said void. Planets, stars, gaseous anomalies (how about that, huh?), all came into existence. Then came people, and that is when things got tricky. People, I guess for a lack of something better to do, began to have an urgent pressing need to understand the motions of all of the various things in this void, and to figure out how to sadistically use them to control their lives. Paper, calendars, sundials, clocks, etc., were all mercilessly developed to this effect. Anyhow, all these events and occurrences have converged, forming the perfect storm of diabolical control. Because of this beast of a perfect storm of events, I am ambiguously forced to do many things I would not be otherwise inclined to do, like going to the dentist. I think we should find descendants of the guy who first had the bright idea of harnessing the events of the universe to control our lives and after pummelling them half to death with an alarm clock, make them go to our dentist-dmv-bank-doctor-mental health therapist-gym-physics class-tax auditor-parole officer-or any uncomfortable or displeasing appointments for us. And our jobs.