AITA: Phantom of the Opera
The other day my younger sister mentioned Phantom of the Opera and how chaotic it is, plotwise. This led me to write a very quick parody in the style of a Reddit AITA post. Enjoy. :)
#AITA
I’m a music tutor (53M) and a guard of sorts at the opera house, and have been seeing a singer there (23F). She started out as a student of mine, then gradually we fell in love. We’ve had some issues at work that keep coming between us, though. I killed one of her coworkers by hanging him from the stage rigging (he sucked; ask anyone; it was no loss). And another time I dropped a chandelier on the audience, but by doing so I was making a statement about neglected compensation that I’m owed, and I must point out that it did get the management’s attention, so it worked. Anyway, I’ve heard (via listening through the walls-I have a network of secret tunnels) a lot of people saying I’m a monster and my gf shouldn’t be with me. Oh, also, forgot to add: there was one time I put a noose around her fiance’s neck and threatened to kill him if she didn’t choose me. But this is the theatre; we’re dramatic folk. Besides, all relationships have their bumps, right? AITA for just wanting her to come down to keep me company in my home on the subterranean lake under the opera house, and for everybody to just let me kill people I don’t like without getting on my case about it?