Episode 69: Sadly won't have anything to do with the 69th position
1) Shino costume is up and running. I'll try to take pictures before the convention (which is today, Thursday), but most likely will take pictures tomorrow. Bringing another costume (the samurai one that you people keep seeing me in...at least, last year) just in case. No clue how I'm sneaking my bokken into the school yet. Will be leaving for the Meadowlands tomorrow, hopefully earlier than 4pm (desired carpool meeting time of dude who booked the hotel room). Currently have an amount of $220 for the whole three days at the con, knowing it won't be enough, but it'll have to do. Oh, I'll be living off of water and gum (if I can get my hands on gum) for the next few days, hopefully I'll shrink (shrink = not be pillow soft anymore...highly unlikely).
2) Got the family car back yesterday. I believe we had to pay $1200+ just to get the engine fixed. *shrug* Not really my concern.
3) School things is doing better than usual. There's a 30% chance I'll be passing MAT 131.
4) Feeling quite blah lately, must be caused by extreme boredom or some unknown factor that's...unknown. I've been going on Gaia and Neopets lately, no idea why though.
5) My birthday's coming up in two weeks. Hopefully I'll have a decent amount of cash by that time. I'm planning on treating some friends over to some place (dunno yet where to go as Chinatown is leading by 3 votes compared to Six Flags' 2) and not only will we be celebrating my 20th birthday, I plan to make this party a goodbye party for Dorothy as well, as she is leaving for Hong Kong, for the rest of the summer, on July 9.
6) Discovered two angst-filled poems I wrote last year. I'll post it on here, maybe below this entry...yeah, below this entry:
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Me
Surrounded by the dark
Surrounded by hate
Cocooned in a shell of pure anger
Here I am, alone, by myself
My heart cold, as cold as ice
All this pain, my only hunger
I shun myself from everyone
Feelings, emotions, kept away from them
My thoughts, non-existent to others
No one listens. No one cares.
My life, my own, my everything
Not owned by father or mother
Friends do not exist. Voices are there for me
The only worthy beings to be close are my own
Serenity is all I want, serenity from this earth
Is my request so hard? So hard to understand?
Why do you have to bother me? Why can’t you leave me alone?
And here I am pondering my birth.
Death for me, an escape, an escape from reality
A life that leads to nothing but pain, pain within
Soul is but a word as my soul has been ripped
Unable to recover, to remember the happiness that was once mine
Joy that no longer exists for the pain that rules inside of me
But none of that matters now for I will never be able to weep.
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Final Day
Leaves in the wind, branches swaying
Little animals scurrying around
Tiny feet running across scorching roads
Birds flapping in the sunny sky
Homes on a street, streets within homes
Shaped materials scattered everywhere
Thumping, booming, noises spreading
Peace found within room and self
White and yellow walls, bed in a corner
Clothing in front, next to knowledge
A table found underneath hobbies
Breeze from above to down below
He sits, thoughts blinding his mind
He waits, pondering for a reason
He stares, empty space surrounds him
Door slams,
people yelling,
shots fired,
he stays silent
Empty space fills with darkness
Rage faces him, forcing it down his throat
"The end is here...I come for you."
Space non-existant as darkness fills the place
He yells, pain spreading all over
He screams, silence surrounds him
He pulls it out, his last stand against all this
Door slams,
no one's yelling,
nothing heard,
he calls
A voice, he hears a voice, a soothing voice
He listens, her voice giving him peace
He replies, weakness in his voice she hears
He speaks, expressing his emotions, his feelings
Then darkness, its growth overwhelming
Shutting windows, he says his last goodbye
Silence fills the room, his phone drops
Motionless, his body in his former life
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7) I'm planning on writing a novel or a bunch of stories during the summer, mainly to keep me entertained. Came up with the idea last night, while reading that one thing I wrote (I believe I posted it on Starwind or BTS or MTF, don't remember) about my cutting my wrist or arm. I figure I could write something without cutting myself and make a fictional story about someone losing someone and suffering because of it...I'll figure something out. I want to try adding lots of details, to cover up my inexperience in writing things other than poems. If I ever get something started, I'll post it in here for you folks to review.
8) That new Batman movie will be seen, maybe tomorrow, if I convince myself to spend $6 on a movie from my convention money. Other summer movies I'd like to see are as follows:
(*) Fantastic Four
(*) Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
(*) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
(*) Donnie Darko (gonna try and rent it)
9) There is no number 9.
10) Just wanted my list to be even. See number 9 about number 10.