blah....

[moistbrownie]

today was weird....it just really sucked. ive just been in a really weird mood where i just wanted to die and that no one would care (im sure no one would cept for like 1) but yeah thats how i feel today. i was kinda like this yesterday but today was worse. i really dont wanna go to the dentist. maybe i can just overdose on tylenol and not wake up tomorrow...i hope i feel better for the wedding but i doubt since i cant fit in my dress which sends my self esteem down the crapper so ill just sit (stand since i cant sit or breath) and act like an idiot. music is usually the only thing that helps and right now im tired of it...all of it i think i need more sleep....ah well. i dont wanna eat until saturday but margie says i have to. eating sucks. i eat way too much. i told my mom i was hungry for chocolate yesterday so she bought me a whole shit load of it and now i feel like im forced to eat it. and since its summer im on my binge eating again since theres nothing else to do. when band camp starts and im not there thats when im gonna turn all shitty and more fatter than i already am.......gah....im done

megan

*someone kill me now cause im already dead. ill leave the door open and the gun waiting. just make sure to return it when youre done.*