You ought to give me wedding rings.
At this point I've built Writing A Wedding Post up in my head to such epic proportions that it seems impossible, so instead I'm just going to write about it for a little while until I get bored, and then maybe post more about it later.
I should start by saying I've sworn up and down my whole life that I'm going to elope; I hated the idea of standing up in front of a ton of people during what felt like such a private moment, plus weddings are so expensive! But I knew we'd have to have our families there (as my mother had made abundantly clear, haha), and I'd want my besties, and Andrew has a big extended family of New Orleans cousins who love weddings and if I was going to be having to deal with family anyway, I wanted to at least get to see my friends too and one thing led to another led to an 80 person wedding. Our biggest goal was to have it be a really good party for our friends: fun and chill, with good food and good beer. I think (I hope!) we succeeded.
I'm going to write about a lot of probably-boring details, because hell, I had to put a lot of time into all of this.
We found the perfect venue in the Atlanta Contemporary Art Center, a 1920s warehouse-turned-museum. As you can see, it's pretty industrial:
It was great because they had a huge amount of both outdoor and indoor space, so we could plan to have it outside, with the inside as a rain backup. Also we have been to approx 12 mil contemporary or modern art museums together since we started dating, like the bougey yuppies we are. And there was easily enough room to have both the ceremony and reception, since I really wanted them at the same place. Plus at night: twinkle lights! (This is from some other event held there; we did not, in fact, have dancers in nude body stockings at the wedding. Shame.)
Music!
If I had one thing to change about how we did the whole thing, it would be not trying to do all the music ourselves: it sounded so feasible to make playlists and set up a sound system and get friends to help babysit the whole thing, but it turned out to be one thing too many, on top of everything else we were coordinating (holy shit, guys, there is so much to coordinate at a wedding). Poor Andrew and my brother were working on it basically right up to the wedding. HOWEVER, I am incredibly happy with the songs we ended up picking for the important bits, so here they are for your downloading pleasure:
Ceremony
Family entering: Sambassadeur - Between the Lines (his pick)
Andrew entering: Stars - This Charming Man (my pick, heh)
Me entering: Sigur Rós - Inní Mér Syngur Vitleysingur (oh gosh, listening to this now makes me cry! Props to bee_stung for getting me thinking about Sigur Ros for ceremony music!)
Recessional: Natalie Cole - This Will Be
First Dances
Ours: Eliza Doolittle - Pack Up (which I originally got from cheapmetaphor!)
Andrew + mom: Rockie Charles - Festis Believe in Justice
Mine with my dad: Israel Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over the Rainbow (I know it's kind of overplayed, but I wanted something my dad would know -- he's 85 (today!) -- but liked the more modern version)
Not Pictured
Epic Miley Cyrus dance routines (you know who you are), Hava Nagila (I didn't fall out of the chair!), the Soulja Boy dance-off between my brother and cousin, the epic, spontaneous, all hands on deck dance party to Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes' Home that was the last song of the night, and which wasn't even planned, until I asked my brother 20 minutes beforehand if he could play it last. It was the most perfect way to end everything that I can't even. I'll never forget it.
Cake!
We were having ice cream for the guests, so we didn't have a big cake for everyone, but I still wanted cake... because cake is delicious.
So we got a little one to do a cake-cutting with: chocolate with cream cheese frosting, from Piece of Cake in Atlanta, and cake stand from (where else?) Etsy.
Here it is under the chuppah, after the ceremony! Look how pretty our chuppah was!
A's stepmom made the covering, which is all covered in lace circles, and the forsythia on the frame is totally fake: I bought it ahead of time and gave it to the florist to work in because I'm cheap, and also really wanted forsythia, which was out of season.
Flowers!
Speaking of cheap and flowers, I really wanted to NOT spend a bajillion dollars, so we just did those two big urns at the chuppah, and then the ~*~personal flowers~*~.
My bouquet (with the ketubah):
(My instructions to the florist were basically: weird flowers! I specifically told her in email "no roses, tulips, daisies, carnations or sunflowers," haha. I love how it turned out!)
And then had craspedia for the guys' boutonnieres (our colors were yellow and gray, if that wasn't evident already).
We used the four bouquets (mine and the bridesmaids') as centerpieces for the head table. (If you're playing a wedding zeitgeist drinking game at home, you get to drink for each mason jar. And the custom-designed Etsy table numbers.):
... and for the other tables rocked this look:
... which I am so proud of, from a cost-perspective. The vases were 99 cents each from Ikea (they look like beakers! Science!), and the flowers are again fake, also from Ikea. We did three vases per table, with a single stem or so in each, so centerpieces for all 8 tables cost about what one centerpiece of real flowers could have. Maybe it's tacky, but I really love how they came out.
Food!
Since you can see chips in the background there let's talk about THE FOOD, oh man, my favorite part to tell everyone about. We had tacos! And beer! And ice cream! Because we're not really adults! The menu cards:
[Click to view larger.]
The ice cream was from the awesome and fast-growing High Road Craft which makes insane flavors. Seriously, horchata ice cream! (Extra cool because we discovered horchata on one of the first major trips we took together, backpacking through Central America.)
Oh the wrangling that occurred with our bar package, to manage something that was both delicious and affordable, beer-wise. We ended up with Weihenstephaner Hefeweissbier and Leffe Blonde, both of which I like to use to try to change the minds of people who think they don't like beer. I insist you try both immediately.
And at the end of the night we had a grilled cheese food truck show up because once we thought of it, all I could think about was how psyched I'd be if I were somewhere and surprise grilled cheese appeared. (Also tomato soup shooters!) I know, so hipster, but GRILLED CHEESE.
Odds and ends:
[+] Our ketubah looked like this! We looked at SO many because there are a lot of fugly ones out there, or things that just aren't to my taste, before we found this one. I love it so much: the minimalism, that it reminds me of the art in A Little Prince, that they're supposed to be moons (space!). The yellow lines are hand-sewn thread so it's all textured, and we found our own text and tweaked it to be just right.
[+] The readings! My brother read the first half of The Irish Blessing, and my cousin read (beautifully!) Meanwhile, by Richard Siken, because you didn't think I could have a wedding sans poetry, did you? (And lest we forget, the flaky rabbi got the reader's name wrong and kept asking for Richard to step up and read the poem; I can't BELIEVE Richard Siken skipped out on reading at my wedding!) (We also put Merwin's A Birthday on the back of the program. Forcible education in poetry and beer, that's how my events go.)
[+] One of my fav things we did was take a giant group photo of all the guests, because when are you ever going to have that many people you know in the same place again? Look at my lovely bridesmaids! And all those obliging, sweaty people! (It was over 90 degrees and just sweltering; I was *so* worried either my dad or Andrew's grandmother would get heatstroke. But they did not!)
SPEAKING OF SAID BRIDESLADIES, I'm going to fake a new wedding any day now just so I can get more time hanging out with them all. Best part of the whole weekend, apart from that whole "getting married" thing.
Of course here I am talking about all the details and none of the emotional substance, which is kind of because I don't know how to without getting weird and embarrassing. It was incredibly intense and strange, having nearly everyone I know and love in the same place, and all the world-colliding messed with my head since it has always been my prime directive to keep my life ultra compartmentalized. I was so hopped up on adrenaline (and the waist of my dress turned out to be so fitted!) that I barely ate anything, which was a bummer, because I'd been so excited about the food. (I made up for it by taking leftovers back to the hotel and chowing down there.) I was also scared about getting accidentally trashed, Lily Aldrin-style, but I think I drank about half a beer, and that only thanks to my brother-in-law putting one in my hand at some point. There were so many people to talk to! And photos to be taken! And dancing to be done! I'd heard so many times what a whirlwind of a day it would be, but it's all a giant, amazing blur.
I remember at one point, after the sun had set and things had cooled off, accidentally ending up alone for a rare minute, standing by the rosemary bushes at the edge of the pavilion, breathing in the sweet-smelling air, looking at everyone dancing and talking and laughing and thinking how much I wanted to remember every single thing.
It was a really really really good day.
I should start by saying I've sworn up and down my whole life that I'm going to elope; I hated the idea of standing up in front of a ton of people during what felt like such a private moment, plus weddings are so expensive! But I knew we'd have to have our families there (as my mother had made abundantly clear, haha), and I'd want my besties, and Andrew has a big extended family of New Orleans cousins who love weddings and if I was going to be having to deal with family anyway, I wanted to at least get to see my friends too and one thing led to another led to an 80 person wedding. Our biggest goal was to have it be a really good party for our friends: fun and chill, with good food and good beer. I think (I hope!) we succeeded.
I'm going to write about a lot of probably-boring details, because hell, I had to put a lot of time into all of this.
We found the perfect venue in the Atlanta Contemporary Art Center, a 1920s warehouse-turned-museum. As you can see, it's pretty industrial:
It was great because they had a huge amount of both outdoor and indoor space, so we could plan to have it outside, with the inside as a rain backup. Also we have been to approx 12 mil contemporary or modern art museums together since we started dating, like the bougey yuppies we are. And there was easily enough room to have both the ceremony and reception, since I really wanted them at the same place. Plus at night: twinkle lights! (This is from some other event held there; we did not, in fact, have dancers in nude body stockings at the wedding. Shame.)
Music!
If I had one thing to change about how we did the whole thing, it would be not trying to do all the music ourselves: it sounded so feasible to make playlists and set up a sound system and get friends to help babysit the whole thing, but it turned out to be one thing too many, on top of everything else we were coordinating (holy shit, guys, there is so much to coordinate at a wedding). Poor Andrew and my brother were working on it basically right up to the wedding. HOWEVER, I am incredibly happy with the songs we ended up picking for the important bits, so here they are for your downloading pleasure:
Ceremony
Family entering: Sambassadeur - Between the Lines (his pick)
Andrew entering: Stars - This Charming Man (my pick, heh)
Me entering: Sigur Rós - Inní Mér Syngur Vitleysingur (oh gosh, listening to this now makes me cry! Props to bee_stung for getting me thinking about Sigur Ros for ceremony music!)
Recessional: Natalie Cole - This Will Be
First Dances
Ours: Eliza Doolittle - Pack Up (which I originally got from cheapmetaphor!)
Andrew + mom: Rockie Charles - Festis Believe in Justice
Mine with my dad: Israel Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over the Rainbow (I know it's kind of overplayed, but I wanted something my dad would know -- he's 85 (today!) -- but liked the more modern version)
Not Pictured
Epic Miley Cyrus dance routines (you know who you are), Hava Nagila (I didn't fall out of the chair!), the Soulja Boy dance-off between my brother and cousin, the epic, spontaneous, all hands on deck dance party to Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes' Home that was the last song of the night, and which wasn't even planned, until I asked my brother 20 minutes beforehand if he could play it last. It was the most perfect way to end everything that I can't even. I'll never forget it.
Cake!
We were having ice cream for the guests, so we didn't have a big cake for everyone, but I still wanted cake... because cake is delicious.
So we got a little one to do a cake-cutting with: chocolate with cream cheese frosting, from Piece of Cake in Atlanta, and cake stand from (where else?) Etsy.
Here it is under the chuppah, after the ceremony! Look how pretty our chuppah was!
A's stepmom made the covering, which is all covered in lace circles, and the forsythia on the frame is totally fake: I bought it ahead of time and gave it to the florist to work in because I'm cheap, and also really wanted forsythia, which was out of season.
Flowers!
Speaking of cheap and flowers, I really wanted to NOT spend a bajillion dollars, so we just did those two big urns at the chuppah, and then the ~*~personal flowers~*~.
My bouquet (with the ketubah):
(My instructions to the florist were basically: weird flowers! I specifically told her in email "no roses, tulips, daisies, carnations or sunflowers," haha. I love how it turned out!)
And then had craspedia for the guys' boutonnieres (our colors were yellow and gray, if that wasn't evident already).
We used the four bouquets (mine and the bridesmaids') as centerpieces for the head table. (If you're playing a wedding zeitgeist drinking game at home, you get to drink for each mason jar. And the custom-designed Etsy table numbers.):
... and for the other tables rocked this look:
... which I am so proud of, from a cost-perspective. The vases were 99 cents each from Ikea (they look like beakers! Science!), and the flowers are again fake, also from Ikea. We did three vases per table, with a single stem or so in each, so centerpieces for all 8 tables cost about what one centerpiece of real flowers could have. Maybe it's tacky, but I really love how they came out.
Food!
Since you can see chips in the background there let's talk about THE FOOD, oh man, my favorite part to tell everyone about. We had tacos! And beer! And ice cream! Because we're not really adults! The menu cards:
[Click to view larger.]
The ice cream was from the awesome and fast-growing High Road Craft which makes insane flavors. Seriously, horchata ice cream! (Extra cool because we discovered horchata on one of the first major trips we took together, backpacking through Central America.)
Oh the wrangling that occurred with our bar package, to manage something that was both delicious and affordable, beer-wise. We ended up with Weihenstephaner Hefeweissbier and Leffe Blonde, both of which I like to use to try to change the minds of people who think they don't like beer. I insist you try both immediately.
And at the end of the night we had a grilled cheese food truck show up because once we thought of it, all I could think about was how psyched I'd be if I were somewhere and surprise grilled cheese appeared. (Also tomato soup shooters!) I know, so hipster, but GRILLED CHEESE.
Odds and ends:
[+] Our ketubah looked like this! We looked at SO many because there are a lot of fugly ones out there, or things that just aren't to my taste, before we found this one. I love it so much: the minimalism, that it reminds me of the art in A Little Prince, that they're supposed to be moons (space!). The yellow lines are hand-sewn thread so it's all textured, and we found our own text and tweaked it to be just right.
[+] The readings! My brother read the first half of The Irish Blessing, and my cousin read (beautifully!) Meanwhile, by Richard Siken, because you didn't think I could have a wedding sans poetry, did you? (And lest we forget, the flaky rabbi got the reader's name wrong and kept asking for Richard to step up and read the poem; I can't BELIEVE Richard Siken skipped out on reading at my wedding!) (We also put Merwin's A Birthday on the back of the program. Forcible education in poetry and beer, that's how my events go.)
[+] One of my fav things we did was take a giant group photo of all the guests, because when are you ever going to have that many people you know in the same place again? Look at my lovely bridesmaids! And all those obliging, sweaty people! (It was over 90 degrees and just sweltering; I was *so* worried either my dad or Andrew's grandmother would get heatstroke. But they did not!)
SPEAKING OF SAID BRIDESLADIES, I'm going to fake a new wedding any day now just so I can get more time hanging out with them all. Best part of the whole weekend, apart from that whole "getting married" thing.
Of course here I am talking about all the details and none of the emotional substance, which is kind of because I don't know how to without getting weird and embarrassing. It was incredibly intense and strange, having nearly everyone I know and love in the same place, and all the world-colliding messed with my head since it has always been my prime directive to keep my life ultra compartmentalized. I was so hopped up on adrenaline (and the waist of my dress turned out to be so fitted!) that I barely ate anything, which was a bummer, because I'd been so excited about the food. (I made up for it by taking leftovers back to the hotel and chowing down there.) I was also scared about getting accidentally trashed, Lily Aldrin-style, but I think I drank about half a beer, and that only thanks to my brother-in-law putting one in my hand at some point. There were so many people to talk to! And photos to be taken! And dancing to be done! I'd heard so many times what a whirlwind of a day it would be, but it's all a giant, amazing blur.
I remember at one point, after the sun had set and things had cooled off, accidentally ending up alone for a rare minute, standing by the rosemary bushes at the edge of the pavilion, breathing in the sweet-smelling air, looking at everyone dancing and talking and laughing and thinking how much I wanted to remember every single thing.
It was a really really really good day.