Title: Kpop Convo's:A Chat!Fic (part 1)
Pairing: Multiple pairings,not really specific*cougheveryonewhoresaroundcough*
Rating: R to maybe NC-17
Genre:Crack,smut,slightly AU
Summary: Keyva has signed in using Messenger+
Warnings: Insanity,language,mentions of sexual activity,drugs and alcohol use
A/N1: Oh wow. Just... Behemoth fic. Me and the ever amazing
cloudy_p had this idea to have a bunch of kpop idols in some kind of MSN messenger sort of thing and, uhm... Yeah. After several days, this is part one of a few *Coughprobablyaboutamillioncough*
A/N2: Okay. This needs to be read in a messenger format. Like, it's like username: messageomghey. Read this like you would an MSN chat log or something, only without the colour formatting and stuff 'cause to do that for everyone would be murder. Enjoy :DDDD
~~~
CHARACTER LIST:
Gorjess - Jessica
TaeBB - Taemin
Keyva - Key
GaemKyu - Kyuhyun
Shisus - Siwon
Tifantastic - Tiffany
SunnyBunny - Sunny
xxYoonAh~ - Yoona
HyeoHyoney - Hyeoyeon
Dubulge - Onew
RaptorJjong - Jonghyun
ChoomTOP - TOP
GDbb - G-Dragon
ACharismaticHo - Minho
KwonBetch - Jokwon
Heedictator - Heechul
RyeoMagnae - Ryeowook
AlienHae - Donghae
SpecialUmma - Leeteuk
VILikeDis - Seungri
CharmingEyedPrincess - Hyunseung
Godwoon - Dongwoon
TaeKitty - Taeyeon
+ Others and cameos.
Keyva has signed in using Messenger+
Keyva: Fuuuck~ Why is there nobody here?! Gooooddddddsss saaaaaakkeeeee.
HHRRNGGGG. BORREEDDDOOMMMM
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
Keyva has invited TaeBB into the conversation.
TaeBB: Hyung! :D
Keyva: Hey, Minnie <3 How's the photoshoot and why aren't you working your maknae little ass off?
TaeBB: Oh! We're on break ^^
Keyva: Awww~ ^_^ Bless chu~ *Huggles*
TaeBB: *Hugs back* How's the washing?
Keyva: Boring as. It's kind of random just sitting here with Jjong's laptop watching the machine go round~ and round~ and round~
TaeBB: Awww~ Oh! Guess what?
Keyva: What, baby? Did Onew kill himself again?
TaeBB: No, no! X3 I convinced Jonghyun to lay off the hairgel!
Keyva: MY BABY. IM SO PROUD OF YOU. *gushgush*
Gwaaaaa~ My lil baby's all grown up, now ^______^
Dubulge has signed in using Messenger+
TaeBB: Hyung! I'm not a baby! Gosh! I'm nearly legal, for Shisus' sake!
Oh, hi Onew-hyung!!! *^^*
Keyva: Hey On- WHOAAAAA. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH YOUR NAME RIGHT THERE OH MY GOD WHAT IF TAEMIN ACTUALLY UNDERSTANDS THAT OMG HOW THE FUCK WOULD I COPE?! YOU'VE TAINTED MY SON. JINKI, YOU FUCKER, CHANGE YOUR NAME NOW OMGOMG. FUCK. NOW. CHANGE.
TaeBB: ....H- Hyung? U- Uhm... Wh- What is "bulge"?
Keyva: OHSHITFUCKOMGJINKICHANGEYOURNAME.
Gorjess has signed in using Messenger+
Gorjess: Hey boys! ^____~
Keyva: OMG JESSSSSYYYYBABBBYYY~ *huggleglompcling*
Gorjess: Omg!! <3 Key my favourite bitch, how are you?! :DD
TaeBB: H- Hey Jessica noona! *^^*
Dubulge: Jessica! Harroh! ^____^
Gorjess: I feel loved rn <3 <3 <3 <3
Haha! I'm fine, I'm fine :3 How's things with you boys?
Keyva: JINKI WONT CHANGE HIS USERNAME. IM WORRIED ABOUT TAEMIN.
Dubulge: I don't see what's wrong with my name personally. It's not like Tae can understand.
Gorjess: ....Yeah. Yeah, key I see why you're worried.
ONEW YOU BITCH CHANGE YOUR FUCKING NAME RIGHT NOW.
Btw, was it you moaning like a slut this morning? I mean, Gods. It was 6:30 and all I could hear was "Oh! Oh! Auuggh! Unnngggg~ Yes! Yes!"
YOU WOKE SOOYOUNG UP. THATS SOMETHING.
Wait two seconds, I'll turn my mic on. I can't be bothered with all this typing! XP
"C- Can you hear me?"
Keyva: O_O Whoaaaa~ Is that you laughing like that?
"Sure as heck is! I mean, really - Dubulge?! Ahahahahahahaha!!!"
Keyva: O_O Calm down. Seriously, I'm worried.
TaeBB: H- Hyung... You never told me what Bulge was... :(
Keyva: You don't want to know.
Shisus has signed in using Messenger+
Shisus: GBU! Hey! =DD
TaeBB: B- But! I want to know what a bulge is!
I mean... Nobody tells me anything! You wouldn't tell me what rimming was, either!
Keyva: Tae, sweety, I love you but shut up right now.
"HAHAHA! WIN! KEY YOU AMAZING LITTLE BITCH! AHAHAHAHA!"
Shisus: WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TEACHING THIS CHILD?!
THE POOR THING. SUCH UNGODLINESS IS UNACCEPTABLE!
Keyva: Shut up right now, Siwon. I don't need your God-bothering. I'm stressed out enough as it is.
Ugh. That's it.
"OH MY GOD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA. HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA."
Gorjess: sorry! X'DDDDDDDDDDDD
I'll calm down right now!!!!
Keyva: Friggin' hell, Sica!
I never knew you were so shrill!
Gorjess: X'D Sorrrrryyyyy!
Shisus: O___________O Wow.
Just. Wow.
TaeBB: ...*pout* Nobody tells me anything any more...
I know! I'll ask Minho-hyung! :D
TaeBB has invited Charismatic into the conversation.
Charismatic: Yo.
TaeBB: Hey hyung! *^^*
What is "Bulge"?
Charismatic: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. BULGE. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.
TaeBB: For heaven's sake!
Shisus: DONT SAY THAT! GOD IS WATCHING THIS FAGGOTRY.
REALLY, TAEMIN.
TaeBB: ...;w; Mi- Mianhaeee... *sniffle*
Shisus: ....Mian, mian. I shouldn't be so rash.
Dubulge: ...You've all forgotten me!
Well. Not quite. I did get busy right there.
Charismatic: With what, hyung? ;DD
Dubulge: SHUT UP, MINHO. JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE A HYUNG WHORE.
Keyva: JINKI WATCH YOUR MOUTH.
YOUR SON IS IN THIS CONVERSATION.
Charismatic has changed their username to "A_Charismatic_Ho"
Keyva: ...Wow. Way to change the subject there, Minho.
A_Charismatic_Ho: I'm amazing, right?
TaeBB: Haha! Nice, hyung! xD
Dubulge: Hey, guys...
I kind of have to go... I'm due on-shoot right now.
See you later.
Dubulge has left the conversation.
TaeBB: Oh. Okay... :(
B- Bye hyung...
Keyva: And then there were... *counts* 4.
Shisus: ...Wow.
Okkaaayyyy. Moving on to a less-sensitive subject, here.
How's practise going? I hear you're making a new MV soon? :D
Keyva: Oh god. You don't wanna know.
Shisus: STOP USING HIS NAME IN VAIN.
Keyva: >_> Sure, sure.
TaeBB: Oh well~
Yah~ Minho-hyung?
A_Charismatic_Ho: Dae?
TaeBB: What the heck is bulge!?
A_Charismatic_Ho: Hmm... I know someone who can tell you.
A_Charismatic_Ho has invited GaemKyu into the conversation.
GaemKyu: WHO THE FUCK DARES TO INTERRUPT MY FUCKING STARCRAFT TIME?! GOD.
I WILL KILL THE MOTHERFUCKER. I ACTUALLY WILL RIGHT NOW.
COME ON, BITCH, TELL ME, WHO THE FUCK WAS IT?!
Shisus: CHO KYUHYUN.
A; MIND YOUR LANGUAGE.
B; STOP USING THE LORDS NAME IN VAIN.
C; IT WAS MINHO.
D; ANGER IS A SIN.
E; REPENT, ALREADY.
Keyva: >_> Sica? You getting any of this?
Gorjess: X'D Yeah.
Sorry, I'm kind of dead right now XDDDD
TaeBB: Gosh...
GaemKyu: ...CHOI MINHO GET YOUR ASS HERE RIGHT NOW.
*Kicks in crotch*
A_Charismatic_Ho: Bitch, you forget this isn't one of your precious games. You can't do jack to me right now.
TaeBB: Go Minho-hyung! :DD <3
A_Charismatic_Ho: <3
Keyva: GOSHMYSONISSOCUTE *squishes Taeminnie*
I LOVE YOU, TAETAE. I LOVE YOU. UMMA LOVES YOU.
TaeBB: H- Hyung! *blush*
Shhh!
GaemKyu: God. It's so cute I want to throw up.
A_Charismatic_Ho: OH HELL NO.
YOU DID NOT JUST INSULT MY MAKNAE.
GaemKyu: Wtf you gon' do 'bout it?
A_Charismatic_Ho: BITCH I WILL OWN YOU AT SOCCER.
Shisus: LANGUAGE! PLEASE! YOU'RE AL TAINTING TAEMIN.
Gorjess: X'D I LOVE THIS CONVERSATION. OH MY GOD. I NEED TIFFANY TO SEE THIS.
Gorjess has invited Tiffantastic into the conversation.
Gorjess: TIFF, GET A LOAD OF THIS.
Tiffantastic: owo; O- kay...?
GaemKyu: BITCH, MINHO. I WILL OWN YOU AT FIFA 11.
A_Charismatic_Ho: SO!? I CAN ACTUALLY SMACK YOU IN THE FACE WITH A BALL.
I HAVE AMAZING SKILLS, KYUHYUN.
YOU CANT DO SHIT. IM LIKE, LEVEL 12093423985792038572938450 AT SOCCER.
GaemKyu: GET REAL. NOBODY HAS THAT KIND OF SKILL
TaeBB: H- Hyung... I- I'm scared... *Huggles Key*
Keyva: OKAY, EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU'RE SCARING MY BABY.
GaemKyu: Shut up, Key.
Minho. Please. Sica here could OWN YOU at soccer.
Gorjess: Daaaaamn straight, boy.
GaemKyu: See, Minho? You're not as great as you think.
A_Charismatic_Ho: Bitch. Girls can't play soccer.
Tiffantastic: *gasp*
Keyva: *gasp*
TaeBB: *gasp*
GaemKyu: *gasp*
Shisus: *gasp*
((lol - synch :B))
Gorjess: ...Bitch.
CHOI FUCKING MINHO GET HERE.
I WILL FUCKING STAB YOU, BTICH.
LIKE, OH MY GOD. GIRLS CAN TOO PLAY SOCCER.
Tiffantastic: Sica. Sica. Yo. Sica. We covered this. Deep breath in. Deep breath out
TaeBB: Haha! Soom! Breathe in Breathe out~
Keyva: MY SON'S SO CUTE *gush*
Gorjess: Sorry, sorry. Bitch, though. I mean. Really.
Talk about sexist.
VILikeDis has signed in using Messenger+
VILikeDis: Yo.
A_Charismatic_Ho: Yeah? Yeah? Sica, fuckin bring it.
Bitch, I will beat you any day.
Gorjess: Bitch. Sure you would.
You forget - I look better in a skirt, //minjung//
A_Charismatic_Ho: Sure you look better in a skirt but at least I don't look like a slut when I wear them.
Tiffantastic: YO. NOT COOL. MINHO, APOLOGIZE.
A_Charismatic_Ho: Fuck no.
Fuck you guys. I'm going.
Keyva: LANGUAGE.
A_Charismatic_Ho: Tae, baby, I'll talk to you when you get back from your shoot, okay? <3
Saranghae! <3
TaeBB: Saranghae, hyung! <3 <3 <3
A_Charismatic_Ho has left the conversation.
~~
...Comments? Questions (Cause there are bound to be a few)? Queries?
Btw... Don't shoot us. :DDD