Fic: A Heel-Filled Education
Title: A Heel-Filled Education
Rating: pg-13 for a few random sweary-words :3
Genre: Uh... Crack? AU? Ish? Idk. Does male!self count as a genre?
Summary: Dai needs educating and Rei decides to interrupt Prussia's Kuroshitsuji time to teach Dai. Hell ensues.
A/N: Idk with this. I dont particularly like it, but I've been promising my dearly beloved some male!self fics for the ReiDai pairing (sort of thing) for ages. And thus, we reach this little piece of crap :3
"Yah! How the hell-"
"It's easy." Rei stands, balances himself and struts across the dining room floor, heels never interfering with his balance. The black stilettos look nightmarish to walk in yet the man seems to glide across the wooden floors in perfect timing. "See?" Rei beams at a glaring Dai.
"God damn... Yeah, but you're American, you're supposed to be able to walk in heels, guy or not. I'm British, therefore I dont cou-"
"Dai. Shut up or I'll get Prussia in here. I swear."
"OH GOD NO. NOT PRUSSIA. Although she might just be able to shed some light on these heels..."
A loud, satisfying smack resonates through the dining room as Rei leaves a red hand print on Dai's arm."Dai. Shut up. ANIER, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE. A BITCH NEEDS TEACHING."
...
The entire house goes dark as a door slams open somewhere else upstairs. Rei isnt quite sure if it's just Dai quivering or whether it's the floor shaking from the force of the door hitting the wall, but he doesnt particularly want to find out, either. He stares at the doorway as Dai clings to his arm, cowering in fear. "WHICH BITCH," A female voice booms, manicured nails glinting in what little light there was. "NEEDS TEACHING. AND WHAT DOES SAID BITCH NEED TEACHING SO BADLY YOU HAVE TO INTTERUPT MY KUROSHITSUJI?!" There's a squeak, Rei's?!, before a timid reply.
"U- Uhm... Gomen, Prussia-sama, to intterupt your Kuro time, bu- but... Dai can't walk in heels...?"
One pair of eyes glow red. Another widens. Another is squeezed shut in fear. "GOMEEEEEN! ITS NOT MY FAULT! I JUST CANT WALK IN HEELS! MY ANKLES, THEY GIVE WAY EVERY TIME I TR-"
"What the fuck, Dai, you live with us, you should be able to walk in heels by now." Anier shakes her head and takes Dai by his hand, pale skin meeting pale skin as the latter trips over his own heeled feet. "Damn this, guys... Just... Damn it. Damn it to hell." Rei and Anier look wearily at eachother before sighing.
"Dai. Seriously, shut up. Watch. It's just like you're walking in normal shoes, but you're higher up." Anier struts back and forth through the room before motioning for Dai to join her. "Come on. It's easy." Rei snorts at the remark.
"Come on bb, ill show u how ;D" Is blaring in his mind, but he ignores his inner voices before raising an eyebrow at Dai. "Listen to Prussia-sama. Prussia-sama is good, Prussia-sama is wise."
"...Sure. Of course." Dai takes a tentative step. And another. And ano-
Dai falls on his face, makeup smearing against the laminate floor boards. He curses harshly into the oak before sitting up again, pouting at Rei for his so far short life. "God damn!" Tears well up in Dai's eyes as his tard-in-tin-foil picks him up and kisses his nose.
"Hey... Don't worry, it takes time to learn these things..." Dai pouts again, eyes wide.
"But- But- I wanna be able to walk in heeeelsssssssss!!!!" He whines and clings to his lover, making small sniffley noises into his collar.
Some hours later...
Prussia and Rei look at eachother before sighing and facepalming. "Dai."
"It's."
"Easy."
Dai glares at them both from his newly found "favourite" place on the floor and stands up, brushing himself off and adjusthing his heels for the umpteenth time. "no it's not. And do I really have to do this? I mean, I dont need to walk in heels, do I? It's not exactly a necessary thing, is i-"
"Shut up. Yes it is. You live with us. You NEED to be able to walk in heels, dammit, and we will teach you! Yikes. And I left Kuroshitsuji for THIS."
Rei, whilst he loves Dai, isnt particularly impressed with all of his beloved's what-the-fuckery and decides that, hey, maybe Dai just isnt meant to walk in heels, but the vision of him in tight-fitting, shining black clothes and a pair of black & silver heels soon changes his mind.
Rei decides he needs to help Dai learn to walk in heels. And then either fuck him senseless or take a cold, cold shower.
Prefferably the former.
Rating: pg-13 for a few random sweary-words :3
Genre: Uh... Crack? AU? Ish? Idk. Does male!self count as a genre?
Summary: Dai needs educating and Rei decides to interrupt Prussia's Kuroshitsuji time to teach Dai. Hell ensues.
A/N: Idk with this. I dont particularly like it, but I've been promising my dearly beloved some male!self fics for the ReiDai pairing (sort of thing) for ages. And thus, we reach this little piece of crap :3
"Yah! How the hell-"
"It's easy." Rei stands, balances himself and struts across the dining room floor, heels never interfering with his balance. The black stilettos look nightmarish to walk in yet the man seems to glide across the wooden floors in perfect timing. "See?" Rei beams at a glaring Dai.
"God damn... Yeah, but you're American, you're supposed to be able to walk in heels, guy or not. I'm British, therefore I dont cou-"
"Dai. Shut up or I'll get Prussia in here. I swear."
"OH GOD NO. NOT PRUSSIA. Although she might just be able to shed some light on these heels..."
A loud, satisfying smack resonates through the dining room as Rei leaves a red hand print on Dai's arm."Dai. Shut up. ANIER, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE. A BITCH NEEDS TEACHING."
...
The entire house goes dark as a door slams open somewhere else upstairs. Rei isnt quite sure if it's just Dai quivering or whether it's the floor shaking from the force of the door hitting the wall, but he doesnt particularly want to find out, either. He stares at the doorway as Dai clings to his arm, cowering in fear. "WHICH BITCH," A female voice booms, manicured nails glinting in what little light there was. "NEEDS TEACHING. AND WHAT DOES SAID BITCH NEED TEACHING SO BADLY YOU HAVE TO INTTERUPT MY KUROSHITSUJI?!" There's a squeak, Rei's?!, before a timid reply.
"U- Uhm... Gomen, Prussia-sama, to intterupt your Kuro time, bu- but... Dai can't walk in heels...?"
One pair of eyes glow red. Another widens. Another is squeezed shut in fear. "GOMEEEEEN! ITS NOT MY FAULT! I JUST CANT WALK IN HEELS! MY ANKLES, THEY GIVE WAY EVERY TIME I TR-"
"What the fuck, Dai, you live with us, you should be able to walk in heels by now." Anier shakes her head and takes Dai by his hand, pale skin meeting pale skin as the latter trips over his own heeled feet. "Damn this, guys... Just... Damn it. Damn it to hell." Rei and Anier look wearily at eachother before sighing.
"Dai. Seriously, shut up. Watch. It's just like you're walking in normal shoes, but you're higher up." Anier struts back and forth through the room before motioning for Dai to join her. "Come on. It's easy." Rei snorts at the remark.
"Come on bb, ill show u how ;D" Is blaring in his mind, but he ignores his inner voices before raising an eyebrow at Dai. "Listen to Prussia-sama. Prussia-sama is good, Prussia-sama is wise."
"...Sure. Of course." Dai takes a tentative step. And another. And ano-
Dai falls on his face, makeup smearing against the laminate floor boards. He curses harshly into the oak before sitting up again, pouting at Rei for his so far short life. "God damn!" Tears well up in Dai's eyes as his tard-in-tin-foil picks him up and kisses his nose.
"Hey... Don't worry, it takes time to learn these things..." Dai pouts again, eyes wide.
"But- But- I wanna be able to walk in heeeelsssssssss!!!!" He whines and clings to his lover, making small sniffley noises into his collar.
Some hours later...
Prussia and Rei look at eachother before sighing and facepalming. "Dai."
"It's."
"Easy."
Dai glares at them both from his newly found "favourite" place on the floor and stands up, brushing himself off and adjusthing his heels for the umpteenth time. "no it's not. And do I really have to do this? I mean, I dont need to walk in heels, do I? It's not exactly a necessary thing, is i-"
"Shut up. Yes it is. You live with us. You NEED to be able to walk in heels, dammit, and we will teach you! Yikes. And I left Kuroshitsuji for THIS."
Rei, whilst he loves Dai, isnt particularly impressed with all of his beloved's what-the-fuckery and decides that, hey, maybe Dai just isnt meant to walk in heels, but the vision of him in tight-fitting, shining black clothes and a pair of black & silver heels soon changes his mind.
Rei decides he needs to help Dai learn to walk in heels. And then either fuck him senseless or take a cold, cold shower.
Prefferably the former.