'I spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap...'
'...and thats what you get for falling again- you can never get him outta your head... its the way he makes you feel...'
Woah. Its been quite a while. So fall break was last weekend, and for the most part, it was great. I spent time with almost everyone that I wanted to and I had an awesome time with everyone. Then, my car broke down on the way home. Luckily I was with Lindsey so she just drove me back to Valdosta, but I had to leave Pinky just chillin in some random parking lot til the weekend. Morgan drove me up on Saturday morning. My mom was mad considering I lied to my brother and sister by telling them that I was already home. I didn't want to ask my mom for money. I thought my car would make it. There has been so much drama in my family in the past year- I'm surprised at how close we still are. We keep finding out all of these lovely things that make us just look into the past and laugh- like how we struggled for so long when our money was being blown on blow. But thats another story for another day. I love collective efforts.
Work is good. I love my coworkers- the night shift especially. Everyone is so much fun, and helpful and they're always keeping me in good spirits which is kinda tough these days. The job pays pretty well which will help so much when it comes time to make the payments to fix my car. $2000 for a brand new transmission, but then, eventually I have to figure out how to fix the CV joints, oil change, radiator drained, new tires... is it all worth it? I think so. Kelly Blue Book doesn't know all- ha! School will definitely be challenging next semester and into the summer. I have 16 hours next semester, and then over the summer I have to decide how long I want to stay here... tough choice. I don't want to be all alone down here, but if it will help me prepare for my future- I just need a little guidance.
I'm starting to like someone that I never imagined that I would. He is not like any of the other guys I have gone for... but I don't think he is quite right for me. He is a wonderful person- from what little I have seen- but then again, he seems to put up this front which I don't know if I quite like completely. He seems very intelligent, and well centered for the most part... I'm actually- for once- showing some interest; lets see how far that gets me. Hopefully I will figure this one out, cause its driving me crazy thinking about him all the time.
I have been in certain situations in the past month that are making me step back and wonder what I can change about myself. Not so people will like me better, but more like the character flaws that in the long run, chase people away. I need to start re-evaluating the way I percieve relationships. I need to show that I care about things. I need to stop this baby shit of pushing people away that I care deeply about and this asshole attitude that keeps people from getting in, and getting close to me.
'Morgan, the sky is the same everywhere...' So if I look up into the dark sky and see the moon, you see its face too?
Sit at your window at night and look at a city building, and down below at the street. As the late night turns to early morning you can see the lights go out, one at a time. At first, there are quite a few cars and as the night goes on, the number you see start to dwindle. Around 3am is when the world seems to be the most quiet. One or two lights are still on, and on rare occasion you see a car slowly heading up the street. As the little hand heads toward the 4 and the 5 a few lights start turning on, and slowly, you see the world come back to life. The sunrise signifies life: a new beginning to a new day. You have one more day. Congratulations- you made it through the night and get to try it again. As the world comes back to life, a feeling comes over the one watching the sun break the dark earth- like you're reborn, A sunset can be beautiful- colorful, romantic and a wonderful thing to gaze out at as you sit with a loved one, but it signifies the end. The day is over, and all you can do is hope for another shot. Not as many people watch sunrises. They are truly beautiful- full of colors. The other day, it was almost nuclear. As the sun burns the dew off of the grass and the night- fog lifts, one is reminded of rebirth, renewal. I thank God for cloudless mornings.
I need to share my passions.