Darkest Secrets
Right now... I regret a lot of things in my life.
Like... being so... cowadly sometimes. To find it so hard to open up at some times.
Or waiting so long to tell... anyone... about my problems. If I had told my parents. If I could put that much faith in them a long time ago, we could had gotten good medicine or maybe a good doctor or something. And these panic attacks... yeah, they wouldn't be.
No, no, no.
There is something worse.
My deepest scariest thing.
Did you know, when you died, that you would haunt me? Really.
I mean, I was an innocent little kid. I didn't know who you were.
But I watched you fall into the street.
And I watched your head hit the concrete twice.
And I was scared to look back. I knew you were long dead.
But, its when I look out these car windows.
That I can just see it all again. Your death... will just always haunt me.
But why me? Was there something in my childhood that I had done so wrong to make me have to bear witness.
Witness to something I was not ready for.
Now, I am ready. This place I live in,
I've seen dead bodies under bus benches
And whatever you may call it.
And if I see anything dead, let it be bird on sidewalk.
I twinge in cowardice.
Because you haunt me.
You have died, but you are still killing me.
I can't fucking see straight.
Like... being so... cowadly sometimes. To find it so hard to open up at some times.
Or waiting so long to tell... anyone... about my problems. If I had told my parents. If I could put that much faith in them a long time ago, we could had gotten good medicine or maybe a good doctor or something. And these panic attacks... yeah, they wouldn't be.
No, no, no.
There is something worse.
My deepest scariest thing.
Did you know, when you died, that you would haunt me? Really.
I mean, I was an innocent little kid. I didn't know who you were.
But I watched you fall into the street.
And I watched your head hit the concrete twice.
And I was scared to look back. I knew you were long dead.
But, its when I look out these car windows.
That I can just see it all again. Your death... will just always haunt me.
But why me? Was there something in my childhood that I had done so wrong to make me have to bear witness.
Witness to something I was not ready for.
Now, I am ready. This place I live in,
I've seen dead bodies under bus benches
And whatever you may call it.
And if I see anything dead, let it be bird on sidewalk.
I twinge in cowardice.
Because you haunt me.
You have died, but you are still killing me.
I can't fucking see straight.