(no subject)

[mochamami]

-sigh-, I just gave up the one good thing I had, for nothing, for something so stupid and something I have to keep a secret from everyone even my journal. Aye, I can't keep talking to Emilio it's depressing me, but then again it's my fault, and NOT talking to him was depressing too. I remember one night Julio got so tired of hearing about Emilio he sent me home, lol, but I can't help it. I already know I messed up any chance with him, that whatever he wants to do is what I have to take even if that means being friends and nothing more, but these feelings I have won't go away, and his are already gone, so fast. So it makes me wonder if he was for real at all. I don't know any better, thank god, maybe something's just wrong with me, but that's ok I guess. I don't even know what I want to write anymore...
Back to faking everything again...

I wish I had someone I can be real with.