(no subject)
This is entertaining, because i know people from our grade will end up at half of these schools.
Vanderbilt: Two--one to call the electrician and one to call daddy to
>pay the bill
>
>Princeton: Two--one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician
>
>Brown: Eleven--one to change the light bulb and ten to share the
>experience
>
>Dartmouth: None--Hanover doesn't have electricity
>
>Cornell: Two--One to change the light bulb and one to crack under the
>pressure
>
>Brandeis: The whole school. It would be the most exciting event to
>happen in years
>
>Penn: Only one, but he gets six credits for it
>
>Columbia: Seventy-six-- one to change the light bulb, fifty to protest
>the light bulb's right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter
>protest
>
>Yale: None--New Haven looks better in the dark
>
>Harvard: One--he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him
>
>MIT: Five--one to design a nuclear powered one that never needs
>changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Boston using that
>nuked light bulb two to install it, and one to write the computer
>program that controls the wall switch
>
>Vassar: Eleven--one to screw it and ten to support its sexual
>orientation
>
>Middlebury: Five--One to change the light bulb and four to find the
>perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion
>
>Stanford: One, dude
>
>Oberlin: Three--one to change it and two to figure out how to get high
>off the old one
>
>Georgetown: Four--one to change it, one to call Congress about their
>progress, and two to throw the old bulb at the American U. students
>
>Duke: A whole frat--but only one of them is sober enough to get the
>bulb out of the socket
>
>Williams: The whole student body--when you're snowed in, there's
>nothing else to do
>
>Tufts: Two--one to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how he
>did it as well as an Ivy League student
>
>Sarah Lawrence: Five--one to change the bulb and four to do an
>interpretive dance about it
>
>Swarthmore: Eight--it's not that one isn't smart enough to do it, it's
>just that they're all violently twitching from too much stress
>
>Bryn Mawr: One- because it would be a violation of the Honor Code if any
>more did.
>
>Boston University: Four--one to change the bulb and two to check his
>math homework
>
>Wesleyan: Wesleyan's boycotting GE... you know, military-industrial
>complex and all that
>
>Connecticut College: Two--one to change the bulb and one to complain
>about how if they were at a better school the light bulb wouldn't go out
>
>Virginia: Thirteen--Ten to form student committee to vote on whether
>changing light bulbs is a violation of the Honor Code, one to change the
>bulb, one to hold the keg the he's standing on, and another to attribute
>electricity to Mr. Jefferson.
>
>Bowdoin: Three--one to ski down to the general store and buy the bulb,
>one to take the chairlift back to school, and one to screw it in
>
>Boston College: Seven--one to change the light bulb and six to throw a
>party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time
>
>Santa Clara University: One--but you would never know about it because
>only Cal and Stanford gets press for changing their light bulbs.
Vanderbilt: Two--one to call the electrician and one to call daddy to
>pay the bill
>
>Princeton: Two--one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician
>
>Brown: Eleven--one to change the light bulb and ten to share the
>experience
>
>Dartmouth: None--Hanover doesn't have electricity
>
>Cornell: Two--One to change the light bulb and one to crack under the
>pressure
>
>Brandeis: The whole school. It would be the most exciting event to
>happen in years
>
>Penn: Only one, but he gets six credits for it
>
>Columbia: Seventy-six-- one to change the light bulb, fifty to protest
>the light bulb's right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter
>protest
>
>Yale: None--New Haven looks better in the dark
>
>Harvard: One--he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him
>
>MIT: Five--one to design a nuclear powered one that never needs
>changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Boston using that
>nuked light bulb two to install it, and one to write the computer
>program that controls the wall switch
>
>Vassar: Eleven--one to screw it and ten to support its sexual
>orientation
>
>Middlebury: Five--One to change the light bulb and four to find the
>perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion
>
>Stanford: One, dude
>
>Oberlin: Three--one to change it and two to figure out how to get high
>off the old one
>
>Georgetown: Four--one to change it, one to call Congress about their
>progress, and two to throw the old bulb at the American U. students
>
>Duke: A whole frat--but only one of them is sober enough to get the
>bulb out of the socket
>
>Williams: The whole student body--when you're snowed in, there's
>nothing else to do
>
>Tufts: Two--one to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how he
>did it as well as an Ivy League student
>
>Sarah Lawrence: Five--one to change the bulb and four to do an
>interpretive dance about it
>
>Swarthmore: Eight--it's not that one isn't smart enough to do it, it's
>just that they're all violently twitching from too much stress
>
>Bryn Mawr: One- because it would be a violation of the Honor Code if any
>more did.
>
>Boston University: Four--one to change the bulb and two to check his
>math homework
>
>Wesleyan: Wesleyan's boycotting GE... you know, military-industrial
>complex and all that
>
>Connecticut College: Two--one to change the bulb and one to complain
>about how if they were at a better school the light bulb wouldn't go out
>
>Virginia: Thirteen--Ten to form student committee to vote on whether
>changing light bulbs is a violation of the Honor Code, one to change the
>bulb, one to hold the keg the he's standing on, and another to attribute
>electricity to Mr. Jefferson.
>
>Bowdoin: Three--one to ski down to the general store and buy the bulb,
>one to take the chairlift back to school, and one to screw it in
>
>Boston College: Seven--one to change the light bulb and six to throw a
>party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time
>
>Santa Clara University: One--but you would never know about it because
>only Cal and Stanford gets press for changing their light bulbs.