(no subject)
yes, its been a while, but I haven't forgotten about my journal. I like this semester, but I feel I am not as passionate about my classes. Thats okay, I am pretty into spanish.
I can already tell that these few weeks are going to be the type I look back on and feel nostalgic and college-y. I don't get much sleep and i drink a lot of caffeine. I do all of my homework and go to my classes. I throw snowballs and ski a lot. I like my music and my friends, especially this past week when I have been in one of those extra confident moods. I climb a few times a week too.
I still can hardly believe how lucky i am to be here. Awesome education, enjoyable people, fun to be had, and I get to go live the mountain life on the weekends when I want. shit.
I sometimes have trouble discerning between what I want to believe and what i actually do believe. The only way you can tell is with an actual test, seeing how you react. I tend to suprise myself with my own virtues in tests. When I thought i wasn't going to be accepted to any out of state schools, I didn't cry or freak out. I accepted it. When I didn't think I had the courage to get up in front of a crowd and give a speech to a few thousand people at graduation, I did it. So now I'll think I would do some virtuous thing, but I don't really know if I would when tested. Last weekend I was pleased to see I can put aside my own priorities when someone else needs help. In philosophy class we talked about that today. I love when i walk out of class not talking to friends or checking my phone, but pushing around the knowledge i learned. Thats why i started thinking about what i want to believe about myself and what my character actually is, and how to be sure which is which. The professor said, according to Adam Smith, people operate on two different methods of concern, the highest people are concerned with the things to the right, and the lowest are to the left:
the praiseworthy vs. praise
the blameworthy vs. blame
principle vs. interest
conscience vs. opinion
of course i know what i want to believe. of course i know i'm a human and have crummy sides too. I like to find evidence in either direction when i can, thats why i dont mind tests.
i'm so earnest these days.
I can already tell that these few weeks are going to be the type I look back on and feel nostalgic and college-y. I don't get much sleep and i drink a lot of caffeine. I do all of my homework and go to my classes. I throw snowballs and ski a lot. I like my music and my friends, especially this past week when I have been in one of those extra confident moods. I climb a few times a week too.
I still can hardly believe how lucky i am to be here. Awesome education, enjoyable people, fun to be had, and I get to go live the mountain life on the weekends when I want. shit.
I sometimes have trouble discerning between what I want to believe and what i actually do believe. The only way you can tell is with an actual test, seeing how you react. I tend to suprise myself with my own virtues in tests. When I thought i wasn't going to be accepted to any out of state schools, I didn't cry or freak out. I accepted it. When I didn't think I had the courage to get up in front of a crowd and give a speech to a few thousand people at graduation, I did it. So now I'll think I would do some virtuous thing, but I don't really know if I would when tested. Last weekend I was pleased to see I can put aside my own priorities when someone else needs help. In philosophy class we talked about that today. I love when i walk out of class not talking to friends or checking my phone, but pushing around the knowledge i learned. Thats why i started thinking about what i want to believe about myself and what my character actually is, and how to be sure which is which. The professor said, according to Adam Smith, people operate on two different methods of concern, the highest people are concerned with the things to the right, and the lowest are to the left:
the praiseworthy vs. praise
the blameworthy vs. blame
principle vs. interest
conscience vs. opinion
of course i know what i want to believe. of course i know i'm a human and have crummy sides too. I like to find evidence in either direction when i can, thats why i dont mind tests.
i'm so earnest these days.