BS
this is gonna be a bunch of random shit.
i cant sleep
i've thought a lot about life lately
influenced by music, a book or two, people, myself
life's pointless.
money is one of the stupidest concepts i've ever heard of
it really is ridiculous.
it causes way too many problems; death, legal things, trust issues
but at the same time its important, people have made it so money is key.
you need it to live. if you have more, you're seen as a better person, bullshit.
i'm sure there's plenty of people living off twenty bucks a week, just as happy as those with millions.
someone's shown me once, every bill is the same piece of paper, just with different printings on it, that somehow make it worth more. ??
same person once told me, when you sit down to freewrite, dont think, just write.
so that's what i'm going to do
i don't know what to write right now, my brother's talking to me.
i need to shower in the morning, i didn't do that tonight.
another thing is love
what is it, is it real?
do you think its real?
i can't say i do.
my parents say theyre in love, but idk
how do they know?
why do people treat others like theyre better than them
thats stupid, it happens everyday
the news is lame too
there was a commercial for the news today and the three things it showed you to get you interested were; "the FBI, state, and local police are involved", "three wounded, one dead", and something about a fire.
is that what people need to hear? or get excited about watching?
rarely, do you see good things that people do or good things that happen on the news
my brothers were talking about something along these lines the other day
one got low C's on his report card, he brought them up and got rewarded from my parents
the other, had B's and A's the whole time and didn't get any special gift whatsoever.
is it better to do worst and overcome some obstacle than to be good off the start?
im not tired
my brothers still talking to me, i just want to write this.
school's a joke. sort of.
i think up to highschool is alright, after that, whatever.
up to the end of highschool, you learn a lot, about life, how not to sound like an idiot, etc.
if you don't go to college, you're valued less than someone who does, why?
i have way too many questions.
i applied to BCC, i don't know if i really want to go.
about a year ago, maybe less, my goal in life was, honestly, to be homeless.
i don't care about enough.
i wish i could be a hippie.
i listen to a lot of modest mouse lately, they're friggen amazing.
i can't wait til summer.
no more school, forever. i'm done. i can live my life, the way i want to live.
i've questioned my views on God lately.
as much as i hate it, because i was brought up to believe in Him, i just don't know anymore.
but school is no place to discuss it, so to kids that try posing their views on an entire class saying their view is right, fuck you.
i think itd be nice to have a girlfriend right now, a cute girl, good sense a humor. thats what i need to find.
i dress shitty though, and i'mprolly not a looker.
iwon't change it though. i'm happy with the way i look.
i get crap for it at work though hah.
the shoes i wear, my pants, my shirts, my hairlength.
i don't care though, i really am happy with myself; sometimes.
i don't know how to use semicolons but i just throw them here and there now and then.
people really piss me off sometimes.
i should really sleep.
i think i'll stay up til 4 or so sleep for a couple hours, then i'll stay up the whole day, hopefully.
still, my brother is talking to me.
i've been upset lately.
today i'm a lot better though, no clue why. but it's good.
if school took away graduation requirements, such as having to pass all 4 english classes, a history elective, a certain amount of math and sciences, do you think kids would still try and pass them? i'm sure they would. i don't know if i would. i'm so nervous about whether or not i'll graduate. I really hope I do, or I'll drop out.
I am not going back to that hellhole for another semester.
I need to keep typing so I don't fall asleep.
I'm past the point of getting enough sleep to wake up at 6, but not quite to the point of getting little enough sleep that i wake up at 6.
if that even makes sense.
i play acoustic everyday now.
it calms me down. i love it.
i learned blame it on the tetons by modest mouse, such a good song.
i'm losing weight i think, slowly, but still losing it.
i'm happy, i was pretty chubby and/or fat aha.
i'm probably losing my mind slowly, too.
i'm so unhealthy.
i try and eat healthly, but I can't.
I eat maybe once or twice a day.
I don't exercise.
I smoke way too many cigarettes in one day.
i'm fine with it though.
It's almost one in the morning.
my parents are up i gotta go
i cant sleep
i've thought a lot about life lately
influenced by music, a book or two, people, myself
life's pointless.
money is one of the stupidest concepts i've ever heard of
it really is ridiculous.
it causes way too many problems; death, legal things, trust issues
but at the same time its important, people have made it so money is key.
you need it to live. if you have more, you're seen as a better person, bullshit.
i'm sure there's plenty of people living off twenty bucks a week, just as happy as those with millions.
someone's shown me once, every bill is the same piece of paper, just with different printings on it, that somehow make it worth more. ??
same person once told me, when you sit down to freewrite, dont think, just write.
so that's what i'm going to do
i don't know what to write right now, my brother's talking to me.
i need to shower in the morning, i didn't do that tonight.
another thing is love
what is it, is it real?
do you think its real?
i can't say i do.
my parents say theyre in love, but idk
how do they know?
why do people treat others like theyre better than them
thats stupid, it happens everyday
the news is lame too
there was a commercial for the news today and the three things it showed you to get you interested were; "the FBI, state, and local police are involved", "three wounded, one dead", and something about a fire.
is that what people need to hear? or get excited about watching?
rarely, do you see good things that people do or good things that happen on the news
my brothers were talking about something along these lines the other day
one got low C's on his report card, he brought them up and got rewarded from my parents
the other, had B's and A's the whole time and didn't get any special gift whatsoever.
is it better to do worst and overcome some obstacle than to be good off the start?
im not tired
my brothers still talking to me, i just want to write this.
school's a joke. sort of.
i think up to highschool is alright, after that, whatever.
up to the end of highschool, you learn a lot, about life, how not to sound like an idiot, etc.
if you don't go to college, you're valued less than someone who does, why?
i have way too many questions.
i applied to BCC, i don't know if i really want to go.
about a year ago, maybe less, my goal in life was, honestly, to be homeless.
i don't care about enough.
i wish i could be a hippie.
i listen to a lot of modest mouse lately, they're friggen amazing.
i can't wait til summer.
no more school, forever. i'm done. i can live my life, the way i want to live.
i've questioned my views on God lately.
as much as i hate it, because i was brought up to believe in Him, i just don't know anymore.
but school is no place to discuss it, so to kids that try posing their views on an entire class saying their view is right, fuck you.
i think itd be nice to have a girlfriend right now, a cute girl, good sense a humor. thats what i need to find.
i dress shitty though, and i'mprolly not a looker.
iwon't change it though. i'm happy with the way i look.
i get crap for it at work though hah.
the shoes i wear, my pants, my shirts, my hairlength.
i don't care though, i really am happy with myself; sometimes.
i don't know how to use semicolons but i just throw them here and there now and then.
people really piss me off sometimes.
i should really sleep.
i think i'll stay up til 4 or so sleep for a couple hours, then i'll stay up the whole day, hopefully.
still, my brother is talking to me.
i've been upset lately.
today i'm a lot better though, no clue why. but it's good.
if school took away graduation requirements, such as having to pass all 4 english classes, a history elective, a certain amount of math and sciences, do you think kids would still try and pass them? i'm sure they would. i don't know if i would. i'm so nervous about whether or not i'll graduate. I really hope I do, or I'll drop out.
I am not going back to that hellhole for another semester.
I need to keep typing so I don't fall asleep.
I'm past the point of getting enough sleep to wake up at 6, but not quite to the point of getting little enough sleep that i wake up at 6.
if that even makes sense.
i play acoustic everyday now.
it calms me down. i love it.
i learned blame it on the tetons by modest mouse, such a good song.
i'm losing weight i think, slowly, but still losing it.
i'm happy, i was pretty chubby and/or fat aha.
i'm probably losing my mind slowly, too.
i'm so unhealthy.
i try and eat healthly, but I can't.
I eat maybe once or twice a day.
I don't exercise.
I smoke way too many cigarettes in one day.
i'm fine with it though.
It's almost one in the morning.
my parents are up i gotta go