Does it Sound Like So Much?
I hate seeing people suffer!
I look all around me. All I see is people in pain, suffering. I can't do nothing about it. These people some how after all their suffering get up and start fresh. What about me? How come I never could do that? How is it that others with far worse situations over come things so well?
I try looking at the world in a positive way, because I know I use to, but I can't seem to pick myself up anymore. And I feel that people are just sticking around just to watch me fail in getting up. I ask for their hand and just shake their heads no.
I know that scars heal. But what kind of scars are these that sting and open more?
I'm lost. I have no idea what to do next. I have no next move, I have no other plans. My focus is becoming weary and I just fall apart all over again.
Yesterday was my day off. It didn't feel like it. I felt trapped and caged, like Nikki said, in my room. I feel that is where I belong. Locked. I feel life would be simpler and less complicated if I just locked myself in. I wouldn't be missing anything.
"You have to stay strong for us" Strength, ha, I never felt so weak. It's not just one thing keeping me on the floor. It's many.
"You could focus on school" I see no point in finishing school. School is becoming more and more complicated to finish than anything. And for what future? A degree would not make this emptiness go away. It's becoming harder and harder to get up from bed. It's becoming impossible to keep my eyes from watering to be able to study.
I just want to lock myself up in my room right now. Turn on the TV and drown myself to sleep. Does that sound like so much?
I look all around me. All I see is people in pain, suffering. I can't do nothing about it. These people some how after all their suffering get up and start fresh. What about me? How come I never could do that? How is it that others with far worse situations over come things so well?
I try looking at the world in a positive way, because I know I use to, but I can't seem to pick myself up anymore. And I feel that people are just sticking around just to watch me fail in getting up. I ask for their hand and just shake their heads no.
I know that scars heal. But what kind of scars are these that sting and open more?
I'm lost. I have no idea what to do next. I have no next move, I have no other plans. My focus is becoming weary and I just fall apart all over again.
Yesterday was my day off. It didn't feel like it. I felt trapped and caged, like Nikki said, in my room. I feel that is where I belong. Locked. I feel life would be simpler and less complicated if I just locked myself in. I wouldn't be missing anything.
"You have to stay strong for us" Strength, ha, I never felt so weak. It's not just one thing keeping me on the floor. It's many.
"You could focus on school" I see no point in finishing school. School is becoming more and more complicated to finish than anything. And for what future? A degree would not make this emptiness go away. It's becoming harder and harder to get up from bed. It's becoming impossible to keep my eyes from watering to be able to study.
I just want to lock myself up in my room right now. Turn on the TV and drown myself to sleep. Does that sound like so much?