Stuff from today (23rd Sept) and some creative writing.
Heheh, this window has been open for hours, and I haven't gotten around to actually typing anything in it. XD
I was planning on watching a movie with Cody tonight, like Lord of the Rings, but I am SOOOOO OOOOOO OOO tired, I dunno if I can stay up later. The only reason I'm still online is that I was waiting to see if Michael would get online tonight, which I guess he's not. No big deal, just that we only got to talk for a few minutes this week, since our schedules totall conflicted. XD So I was hoping to catch him on a Friday night when he doesn't have school the next day or something. Oh well, maybe tomorrow. =D
I apparently missed my first American History exam on Monday/Tuesday, and I had no idea about it until Wednesday when my professor sent me a message asking what the deal was. She said I wouldn't be able to make it up unless I'd had an emergency or something, so I was honest and told her that I didn't have the exam done because I was an idiot and I had missed all last week's stuff because I was lazy and depressed, and consequently had absolutely no idea there was an exam to miss. XD Surprisingly, she said she'd let me off the hook just this once, since I was honest and I guess she appreciated my circumstances. So she gave me another opportunity to take the exam. She automatically docked 15% from my score, but I'm okay with that because it's better than a 0. So I was really excited about that, and I did the exam when I got home from work today. I don't think I'll get a full 85%, because I may have gotten one or two questions wrong and I may not have completely answered some of the essay questions, but I think I'll get a passing grade, which is awesome.
Work...blah.... It was okay, actually, but somewhat stressful because we have new everything, including the computer system, so our registers are all different and everything was in different places from what I was used to. I purposely got hardly any sleep so I could get up early to get to work early so I could have time to learn the NewPOS and where everything is now, but no, I was there for 5 minutes and they were yelling saying they needed my help and I had to clock in, which I didn't even know how to do, by the way. Then I was supposed to take orders, and I didn't know how to do THAT....I learned pretty quickly, but when they stuck me in back drive to take half the orders and all the money, I was so slow, because I am just not used to these new registers. I'm used to knowing exactly where everything is on the screen, and my fingers knowing where to go before my eyes could tell me. That's how I was so fast, and since I had to sit and look for all the buttons, it was just... ugh. I mean, the day was okay, all things considered. I got off early, I had a good meal, it wasn't too stressful once they sent someone back to help by taking money (even though it was MY drawer, not hers, and she's not a crew trainer, and even though I will be, I'm not YET so if there were any shortages, I'd get blamed). It was all good in the end.
Of course, even though I submitted my availability form and it says I'm only available Mon, Wed, and Fri from 6-3, once Theresa took over the schedule that went to pot. She scheduled me 10-5 on Monday. Really, Theresa? You CAN read, right? You know your numbers? You know how to tell time? You should, you're a store manager/supervisor thing. Really. Come on.
Luckily, my dear friend Diana is going through a rough time (just bear with me, that's not as bad as it sounds), and she needs as many hours as she can get, so she's been working 12-13 hour days all this week. I asked if she'd switch shifts with me, since she comes in earlier, and she could still come in at the same time and just stay till 5. She agreed.
I'm so glad I can be there to help her out, though, I really am. She doesn't have support from a lot of people, mostly just a couple of friends and her brothers. She's my age, and she has SO MUCH on her shoulders right now. I don't know if I could handle everything she's going through. I really admire her strength. But it only goes so far; she does need a shoulder to cry on sometimes, and someone to tell her it's all right. I wish I could provide something more for her, but I'm happy iwth what I can do for her. If it helps, it's good enough for me.
Ha, it's funny, thinking about being an emotional support for someone else, when I'm something of a mess myself. I'm feeling pretty insecure myself these last few days. I kind of feel like maybe I suck or am not good enough for my friends, except for when they need something from me. Now, I know that's not true, realistically. They wouldn't actually be my friends if they only wanted things from me and that's it. And they are my friends. But I've just been in the frame of mind lately where I misinterpret everything to be some sort of sign that I'm not worth people's time... Oh well, I suppose I'll get over it soon. I'd better. >.>
Apparently I'm not the only one feeling like "freedom of speech" is a little one-sided these days. My brother and grandma, among others, don't like what's happened to America, but if they say it, they get yelled at or called evil or some such thing. Some kid, I THINK someone who goes to school with either my brother or someone we know, apparently was talking to one of his friends at school and told him that he thinks homosexuality is wrong. He wasn't targeting it at anyone in specific, just stating his belief, but the teacher overheard, yelled at him, and sent him to the principal's office. The principal suspended him for a few days, until the parents complained. So his suspension became a 1-day sentence instead. His parents weren't happy with that, so they hired a 1st-amendment lawyer to have a nice chitchat with the school. I guess this is pretty recent, so my dad didn't know for sure if everything had been worked out, but we think it has been taken care of.
It's kind of sad to think I'm not the only one out there who feels this way. The whole "you can be who you want to be, think what you want, believe in whatever, and say it if you wish" thing has had a major amendment made to it. It is now, "You can be who you want to be, think what you want to think, believe in whatever, and say it if you wish, as long as it's something we agree with." And even more than that, it's like the whole world has picked up the same prejudices against the minority, when it claims to be getting rid of such things. Talk about hypocrisy. "It's okay to be gay, it's okay to be Muslim, it's okay to be Hispanic, or black, or Jewish, or liberal, or whatever. We want everyone to feel welcome here. We want everyone to know they're valued. Except if you happen to believe homosexuality is wrong; then you're a homophobe and you're not welcome. And if you happen to be a Christian, well, you're an extremist who just wants everyone to be slaves to your way of thinking, and your way of thinking sucks, so you are not as good as anyone else, either. And if you're white and are doing well, how dare you be so racist and act like you're better than everyone else." I mean, what the hey? "We believe in freedom of speech, EXCEPT if you're going against the grain?" *shakes head*
I just wish more people read my blog, I feel like I'm ranting to people who will dismiss what I say because it's an uncomfortable truth that people these days aren't actually trying to make everyone equal, they're trying to raise the minority up so it's on a higher level than what used to be the majority. And overthrow anything they feel used to be the majority, the oppressors. That's not equality, that's payback.
Anyway, so I'm not alone in feeling this way. So, if anyone out there read my rant post a couple days ago, that's not just me. Other people feel like they're not allowed to believe what they want without being harrassed for it, too.
On a different note, I have schoolwork to do tomorrow, and other things, like working out, so I should go to bed, since it's getting late and I should've been in bed ages ago. I'm gonna end with a little bit of writing based on a creative writing prompt, to start getting me ready for NaNo. ^^
Her laugh broke the silence.
"HA!" It was a loud noise; a hard noise. There was no mirth to it. Daniel's eyes opened wide in surprise, while Jacob merely looked at her, the same stony expression on his face that had been there when he walked through the door.
Chelsea looked right back, her mouth twisted in disgusted mirth. "It's not as if we didn't expect this to happen," she said bitterly, then laughed again. "Who were we trying to fool? The Board of Directors doesn't have time for the likes of us," she said, plucking at her colorful shirt and gesturing to the room around them, as if that were all the explanation necessary.
Daniel looked a bit disgruntled at her outburst, and opened his mouth to protest, but Jacob was nodding in silent agreement, and he floundered for a moment before he found something to say.
"But...I mean...well, why? We were doing so well, and we were bringing in profit for the Board. Why now, why us?" He looked pleadingly at Chelsea and Jacob, clearly not understanding, and just as clearly not wanting to.
Chelsea hesitated, wanting to explain, but hating to shatter yet another of Daniel's innocent ideas about the world. He had changed so much in the little time they'd been out in the world, and she couldn't bear it if he lost any more of what made him, well, him.
Jacob had no such compunctions, however. "We're bad for their reputation," he said flatly. "To them, we're freaks. We don't belong here with the normal people like them, no matter how successful our program was." Daniel's brow creased, and he looked shocked and hurt. Chelsea jumped in, trying to soften this blow.
"We're not freaks, Daniel. We're just...different. We dress differently, and we talk differently. We live differently, and we think differently. The Board has an idea about how things should be, and since we don't fit into that picture, they're getting rid of us. It's not because there's anything wrong with us, it's because they don't understand us."
"They can't," Jacob said, in a tone so final that even Daniel didn't try to protest this time.
They sat there looking at each other for a time, wondering what to do next. They had tried everything, and they had failed. Was there anything left for them? Chelsea worked furiously in her mind, trying to solve this problem, as she had every one before. There had to be something. There just HAD to be.