Feb 03, 2005 01:34
ok... okokokokandok
i fucking hate my life. I thought prozac was the answer but it is not. i am drinking vodka out of a coffee cup cause i haven't had the energy to run the fucking dishwasher. i am having trouble finding the right keys on the keyboard and am hunting & pecking.
jason and i are having the same stupid fucking ass arguments that we have been having for 3 years. we started to talk tonight about what was it all about and it fell apart.
i need to dump his stupid ass but can't.
it's more than three years - it's eleven years at this point. you'd think i'd be over it but i am not. this shouldn't be called bored at work it should be called i hate myself and my life.
5 minutes after i say the absoultly most cuntass thing i can think of to say i realize that all i want to do is hold him and be with him.
those of you that know me probably have an idea of just how cunty i can be.
another poll: just how much of a bitch am I? is it inherant in my personality? is it something i should even worry about getting over? Nick - I know what your input will be but try to be objective about it.
i want to throw myself off the roof. i won't. i have a DR's appt tomorrow and will speak to him of my troubles.
i feel like i am an inherantly good person.
why does asking why have to be so shitty